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Thread: pureness

  1. #1
    You've Earned a Custom Title! mc pyro.'s Avatar
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    pureness

    upon first meeting eyes of green and brown were mixed
    love had to be fixed perfection of thier unsepretable lips
    their nations differ at war but with them it's only peace
    at least they can be openly together when they decease
    but they have found a secret place their own santuary
    the woman grows weary of this war so the man carrys
    ... her through the morning grass with droplets of dew
    he's told her that she was the only love he ever knew
    he as he whispers to her I on to her and he on to you
    one day this'll be over.. their departure return to lives
    instead of these love lies that will never be inscribed
    the sun dissapears behind a radiance of amber an gold
    he knows one day they will be killed and their story told
    across all nations when their are peaceful as a legend
    she mutters to him i will stay forever wit u in this heaven
    still the darkness aproaches but it will bring a new day
    plants erupting from the soil in the meadows they lay
    hearing the distant percussion and calling from a sea
    hoping they stay in each others arms for all eternity
    the man continues to worry he feels he has to belive
    that this love shall never perish that they wont leave
    that night a child was concievied..........................
    but from the everyone else that truth was sheathed
    the woman always feels total joy always in pure bliss
    she never thinks of this knows their are limits not risks
    and the woman.. she deliverd perfectly and gave birth
    to a child with infanite potential, greatness, and worth
    willows drooping they stare intametly across flower beds
    in their heads they know that they finally, secretly wed
    and their child. continued to grow more and was raised
    sun danced, haze this place seemed all pretend a daze
    the days that followed the dreaded day was apporachin
    that the couple and thier child will be seprete by ocean
    hope one day they'd meet again at the ends of the earth
    the child would go with his mother cause she gave birth
    they knew that the day was there when they saw ships
    one last kiss before they boarded mouthed wit they lips
    they bid eachother one inveditable goodbye and farwell
    they could already tell that this seperations was a hell
    she tells her father that she found the baby on shore
    her father accepts this and brings the baby on board
    both crying for days in their rooms for what once was
    because... it branded them and thats what love does
    if she see's him just once more she'll be happy only then
    but tears will flow between them until they meet again

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...90#post4662990
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...95#post4662995
    Last edited by mc pyro.; June 30th, 2006 at 12:46 PM
    hit up these om's wit some feed

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  2. #2
    You've Earned a Custom Title! mc pyro.'s Avatar
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    uppin some feed on this
    hit up these om's wit some feed

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  3. #3
    Black Dot Biography!
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    What's 'deace'?
    PE|WV

  4. #4
    Planet of the Rapes. Evolve's Avatar
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    Thats not a word... lol.
    Rappers sound the same man, found 1 game plan & ran through it
    They all got that Geico flow.. Cause even a cave man can do it

    ArtificialIntelligence









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  5. #5
    You've Earned a Custom Title! mc pyro.'s Avatar
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    sorry bout that decease is what i meant plz leave feed though
    hit up these om's wit some feed

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  6. #6
    Planet of the Rapes. Evolve's Avatar
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    decease still doesnt make sense...shouldn't it be "when they are deceased"? You used decease as an action. You don't decease. When you are dead.. you are deceased.
    Rappers sound the same man, found 1 game plan & ran through it
    They all got that Geico flow.. Cause even a cave man can do it

    ArtificialIntelligence









    AI

  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by Evolve
    decease still doesnt make sense...shouldn't it be "when they are deceased"? You used decease as an action. You don't decease. When you are dead.. you are deceased.
    damn thats just what i was gonna write, i mean sometimes you can pull certain lil things off, but that threw it a bit i thought,, got feeling into the piece though... decent job

  8. #8
    Black Dot Biography!
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    Actually, you can 'decease'

    When you end life, you decease. Hence 'Your father has deceased' would be the past and present tense, and to 'decease' would be future tense, maybe borderline present, depending on the rare occasion of weird grammar

    He used decease to describe their deaths in the future, so yes, as much as we both hate to admit, the little guy is actually right.

    Damnit, is it just me or did RB just get slightly smarter?
    Last edited by Dat; June 28th, 2006 at 01:03 PM
    PE|WV

  9. #9
    You've Earned a Custom Title! mc pyro.'s Avatar
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    sorry fine i'll change it again but plz leave some feed on the acutal peice
    hit up these om's wit some feed

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  10. #10
    You've Earned a Custom Title! mc pyro.'s Avatar
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    uppins
    hit up these om's wit some feed

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  11. #11
    S.N.I.C.....is no more... Don Q's Avatar
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    it was a good piece. dont worry about what they said, its really just one era you overlooked but otherwise it was good. the rhymes were kinda basic but the piece was once again, good. the story was very long i dont know how they let you off on that part.
    I'm not necessarily the original, more like the new but don't ever compare me to another.

  12. #12
    You've Earned a Custom Title! mc pyro.'s Avatar
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    thx uppin some feed
    hit up these om's wit some feed

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  13. #13
    You've Earned a Custom Title! mc pyro.'s Avatar
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    hit up these om's wit some feed

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  14. #14
    You've Earned a Custom Title! mc pyro.'s Avatar
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    plz leave feed on this
    hit up these om's wit some feed

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  15. #15
    You've Earned a Custom Title! mc pyro.'s Avatar
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    cmon plz feed on this
    hit up these om's wit some feed

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