Introduction To Murder

[Moe Sizlack]

Its Time To Meet The Best Men
Who Ever Pick Up Weapons
Yall Was Hard For Awhile Like Erection
Then Got Cut Up Like C-sections
Pistol Perfection
Killing My Profession And Religion
Letting Yall Live Is Out The Question
Plus My Smith-n-wesson Stressing
Bullets Are Confessin, My Hate
For Those Testing, My Weight
Im Flexing My Arms In Ur Direction
I'm Not Talking Gold Gym
I'm Talking Austrian
Porcelin Gats With Hollows In Em
Following Them
Running Wild Think They're Dodging Em
They Keep On Talking Gems
I'll End Up Robbing Them
Murder Them With My Bloody Emblem
Pistol Sizzling Burns My Hand When Its Whistling
I Can Tell You Niggas Aint Listening
Told Em Blood And Adrenaline Got Me Killing Men
Pocket Felling Thin So Im Shooting Them
Then Im In The Wind
I'll Make This Muthafucka Hot
For You Take My Block
Hostile Takeovers
Get Funeral Make Overs
I'd Probaly Kill Myself If I Was Sober
So Pass The Doojah Soldja
And Put The Heat In Ya Shoulder Holster
Cops Is Creeping On Cordova
Watch Ya Back My Nig Things Done Changed
There's All These Fakes Putting Bullshit In The Game
So On All Snakes I Empty Full Clips And Bang
Plus I Hang With A Deranged Gang
We Sell Dope U Can Snort, Smoke And Shoot In Ya Vain
And We Know Whut It Means To Be Wet In The Rain
We Smoke Sherm Then Cover Da Street With Bloodstains
I Always Tell My Boys U Gotta Put One In The Brain
Now U Know They Dead!

[Moe Sizlack]

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=296490
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=296485

[Endeva.]

you need to work on your flow man, and the way it chopped and changed, like your structure, could have worked out good, but you lacked fluidity... try and even things out a bit, i mean it doesnt have to be generic, but...

like i said it didnt come off the tongue too well... keep at it

[Moe Sizlack]

yeah thx, i appreicated the feedback and advice dev

[Stunee]

I liked it, this is more my style. Not complicated at all...your structure is a bit off, but it's not hard to follow at all. Not everything rhymed, and the lines (part of the structure comment) could be stretched a bit for more of a description maybe...I like some of the vocab you used, not the same old rhymes over and over. Like I said, its more my style and I like it, good job.

[Il' Romeo.]

i dant like this i dnt get wat it was about,the flow wasent the best and the lines wer to short,u shud have made them longer.i dant like the 2 word lines then u followed it up with like a 5 word line that went on throught the peice,because the lines dant make sense it didnt flow and dant sound right wen i was readin it

keep rytin and tryin to improve g/l