My Last Rhyme

[The Vortex]

These are my last darts as all turns dark & mysterious
Final prose from the heart, hope it reaches all areas
I exhale breath for the sacred cipher and inhale death
I see the Reaper creep: he says, “You got five minutes left”
Can’t move, this is sum cruel shit, held in an icy cool grip
A flashback on sum bullshit reminisce as a school-kid
Sketchy descriptions of joy; visions suddenly destroyed
Thoughts void of a ploy, decoyed by a demonic android
Spitting fire & brimstone, leeches attach skin & bone’
My voice akin a drone par atone with the methadone
Pain free passage to Dead-land; avert carnage in Bedlam
Tried pursuing a best plan but it led into deaths hand
Peep thru the spying hole; heed the song of a dying soul
Breathless left lying cold in the trenches desiring goals
My pulse pace degenerates… internal aches escalate
I contemplate the mistakes then calculate lucky breaks
Ready to face the music; I would jig but am too sick
Lights diffuse, I go true stiff: now this rhyme is conclusive.

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link
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=228951

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=228702

[Mystery~Murdera]

As I said I think people sometimes get too deep with the OMs BUT this
is good as shit. You carried the topic through very well with the multis
and your lines. Your poem never lost sight of the theme and was peaced
together very very well. Along with a great vocabulary. Superb piece.

[The Vortex]

thanks fosho

ups

[Homesick]

Real nice man. Where 'bouts in London are you?
-Pz.

[Mista Loc]

This is pretty good stuff man. I think it's a little too much "the ghost plays laser fights with the galaxy" nerd ass shit, but none the less it's pretty dope. The style was original but the peice was short and unoriginally undeveloped.

return the favor

[The Vortex]

good looking out

South

ups

[The Vortex]

uppety ups

[The Vortex]

last fucking bump

u shitty shits

[uncivl]

a my man that shit was hot man lik how u mix the way u were
feeling at the time kno wat i mean dude but keep at it..............

[aSap iLL]

Word this shyt was good.. i was really feeling it you had some nice mutlies.. Your vocab and wordplay was okay it wasnt to bad..your emotions and imagery was good it was really on point.. overall it was a good peice..and i was feeling it ..

Nice job

[The Vortex]

^ thanks yo i appreciate the replies