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Thread: Survivor

  1. #1
    BRB, Jumping Ship Baron Mynd's Avatar
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    Awards 1-2 Punch HW Champion Legendary Member Legendary OM OM HOF SS HW Champion LLL Champion - Award Request Accepted

    Survivor

    TOPIC: Your on a plane to enjoy a vacation with your wife/girlfriend/fiancee. Your on your way to the Bahamas when the planes engines start smoking and the plane crashes. When you awake your the only one alive and your stuck on an island by yourself. What do you do? Progress...




    Thunder crackled. .engine failed, we were going down
    I blacked out. Next thing i remember was coming round. .

    ...Gradually i stood. . my sickened stomach in knots
    Bodies scattered, shoulders hunched, w/ holes in their guts
    bones crushed beneath the wreckage, passengers neglected
    Most of them id never met and yet i felt strangely connected.
    Thoughts swept in my head as i bled, searched for survivors
    But all i found was despare and bodies piled cold and lifeless.
    My mind switched off as i turned over the body infront of me
    Only to uncover the Scolded Flesh on the Face Of my Family
    It got Harder To Breath as the Petrol Smoke Filled My Lungs
    Reality Sunk In, Chances are - only id Survived The Outcome.
    Try Picturing A Field Of Blood, Scattered w/ Shrapnel Shaves
    Bodies twisted out of shape and with no help of being saved.
    The only way id escape this Nightmare was a Rescue Service
    so i gathered various metals and wood to help aid my purpose.
    Hours passed as i worked spelling out "HELP" on the beach
    in letters 8 feet high . . hoping passing helicopters would see.
    Eventually i gave up hope, hours had passed but to no avail
    Darkness settled in, i was forced to spend the night in this hell.
    Hollow inside, i swallowed my pride and slept among the dead
    Mentality Broke. . i was too shook to Pay any sort of Respect.
    Broke into a cold sweat, isolated . . stomach on empty, yet...
    The only Sourse of Food available to me was human Flesh.
    Arms and legs lay motionless - a painted canvas of suffering
    Shivers of Hate, tears Wither and Fade into Pools of Nothing.

    Four days later. .

    So i Sit, Watch and Wait . . Staring At The Interface
    In a Shield of pain, hungry, vision faded, eyes glazed.
    Weaker by the Second, Dehidrated . . my Last Stand
    and what your reading are the words of a dieing man. .



    Peace!
    Last edited by Baron Mynd; July 19th, 2003 at 02:27 PM

    WORD P e r f e c t !


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  2. #2
    WOOSHY
    Guest
    hay cam nice drop dogg lines flowed well, intresting concept, the story line was sum what unusal but i liked it, peep this dogg http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...threadid=66819
    much apperatied Woosh

  3. #3
    BRB, Jumping Ship Baron Mynd's Avatar
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    Awards 1-2 Punch HW Champion Legendary Member Legendary OM OM HOF SS HW Champion LLL Champion - Award Request Accepted
    ^ Will Do. .

    WORD P e r f e c t !


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  4. #4
    9 Millimeter
    Guest
    yo nice shit

  5. #5
    BRB, Jumping Ship Baron Mynd's Avatar
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    Awards 1-2 Punch HW Champion Legendary Member Legendary OM OM HOF SS HW Champion LLL Champion - Award Request Accepted
    ^ carefull with the one word replies, Sand will bann you. .

    WORD P e r f e c t !


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  6. #6
    BRB, Jumping Ship Baron Mynd's Avatar
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    ^ Thats Werd...

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  7. #7
    Slutbag ToNe-E's Avatar
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    bones crushed beneath the wreckage, passengers neglected
    Most of them id never met and yet i felt strangely connected.

    Nice .. ^

    Worded dope, i liked this .. it had some cool imagaries ..
    i felt like i was there .. good job sweety .. multi's were
    pretty nice, vocab good .. and you stayed on the topic
    well, what else can i say .. you wrote a iLL open mic bro ..

    Good Job ..

  8. #8
    BRB, Jumping Ship Baron Mynd's Avatar
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    Awards 1-2 Punch HW Champion Legendary Member Legendary OM OM HOF SS HW Champion LLL Champion - Award Request Accepted
    Gyeah! I Got Props From Mister Tone! Im Now Dope : )

    WORD P e r f e c t !


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  9. #9
    NONCENTZ AKA WORD~PERFECT noncentz's Avatar
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    you captured an emotion that one can only assume was ging throught the minds of the individuals in that situaution that is real talent pa this was by far top notch wrk if you have time peep my drop ORDO ABACHO
    to love something,is to die for it ,if you do, your a martyr , but these days music is morbid, false carters ..prohet's for prophet no lie, look how our last martyr was crucified. to put it in it symplicity, you aint true...you wouldnt sacrifice a few dollars for authenticity..

  10. #10
    BRB, Jumping Ship Baron Mynd's Avatar
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    Damn you 28 views and 4 replies. .

    WORD P e r f e c t !


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  11. #11
    BRB, Jumping Ship Baron Mynd's Avatar
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    Awards 1-2 Punch HW Champion Legendary Member Legendary OM OM HOF SS HW Champion LLL Champion - Award Request Accepted
    Uping so dao can reply : )

    WORD P e r f e c t !


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  12. #12
    triztwarrior
    Guest
    Sorry i didnt reply sooner,
    That was some dope shit you dropped there,
    Peace

  13. #13
    BRB, Jumping Ship Baron Mynd's Avatar
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    Awards 1-2 Punch HW Champion Legendary Member Legendary OM OM HOF SS HW Champion LLL Champion - Award Request Accepted
    ^ Cheers Bro. .

    WORD P e r f e c t !


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  14. #14
    Banned MiCsYcKlE's Avatar
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    this was a banger
    9/10

    keep it up

  15. #15
    S.O.L.D. ENTERTAINMENT BLuNT's Avatar
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    ok, .. I thought it was good... personally topicals aren't my usual "cup of tea" or what have you, but this was a'ight.. I did like the really great imagery you used, I could almost smell the char'd flesh of my family (mmmmmm).. I didn't like the spelled help Idea, not very origional, you watched ummm, I forget the movie.. with tom hanks.. lol.. over all I'd say it was worth reading, but I've deffinately seen better from you.. check out my shit..
    <center><a href="
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