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Thread: The Assassination of Christianity

  1. #1
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    The Assassination of Christianity

    The Assassination of Christianity

    A shadowed silhouette shifts sediments unfurls as he walks
    a cloud around him shrouds a morbid thought contorted like whores
    a rogue in a war, revenge is still his only recall, a rose and a thorn
    The death of Christianity sought


    within imbedded cryptogram his fall is scripted in hymns,
    stripped of its skin, revealed and saturated in sin, particular lines,
    inverted flipped and twisted aligned, meticulous signs, articulated
    ripped and defined, sedated it brims, equated in ornate idiom

    the assassination equation takes the form of a maiden
    soul, heart, and the mind his final demise


    The Daughter

    an abbot stabs a granit tablet hammers accurate passages
    the hand of a pacifist “uneasy” quivers and stammers
    immaculate massacres “revealed” the world of an anarchist
    deliverance clambers, as he fathoms, stricken with panic….
    its to late… he levitates, incarcerated nirvana,
    prenatal stigmata, his navel rots the birth of a daughter
    the order, watches in horror, celibacy and honor,
    now they lay in the corners “contemplating”
    chinks in their armor

    with two hands amidst the carnage wrestled cracks in the floor
    a yellow eye beneath the cobblestones enamored in awe
    he grips the child in one fist, the face of anarchy born
    releasing demons in the monastery… “pfft… kill them all”

    The First born

    He raped my mother, my own father, mercy help me my lord
    “what this emotion is it fear, I’ve never felt it before”
    this can not be, I don’t believe you were not part of my plans
    and yet your beauty supersedes the artistry of my hands
    she drops to the floor, crawls towards the base of his feet
    bathing them weeps “raises” I’ll do anything please
    the seed of lust infested his core ,molested his sword
    she sucks his soul digested and raw, injected a spawn
    which rips his heart, the chest getting torn,
    the dead setting dawn, his son walks in the sign of hope,
    then cuts his neck with a saw

    "it started with one thought"

    The Father

    I couldn’t have it id established ruthless habits for years
    mankind needed to see the reasons my procedures sincere
    Judis easily seeing treason kept deceiving you eagerly
    he believed in me … I dominate control all my scenery
    had the Romans allegiance see how they whipped you repeatedly
    you looked up at me begging me father give me the energy
    I remember smiling at you thinking suffer the penalties
    sacrificing you did more than any fucking atrocity
    simple truth is you became a challenge to my authority

    The Son

    A shadowed silhouette shifts sediments unfurls as he walks
    a Cloud around him shrouds a morbid thought contorted like whores
    a rogue in a war, revenge is still his only recall a rose and a thorn
    The death of Christianity sought


    brother seek out my mother, love her under cover of night
    lust of our father must be garnished by the damned and divine

    “it will be my pleasure”




    ..........~ManSin~...........

  2. #2
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    Last edited by ~Mansin~; November 13th, 2006 at 01:51 AM

  3. #3
    Banned Ace of Aces's Avatar
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    very long, but well, very well worth the read. do you have an alias? it's obvious you have writing experience. the multies in this were great and they did not stagger the meaning a bit. the entire personification of the concept was unique and well staged. emotion was overwhelmed by the technique when most times its the other way around. great piece, one of the best i've read this week. until i know your alias, i don't think i've seen a piece from you before, keep writing though, and if you're looking for a crew, Pandora's Box is available to ya.

    peACE

    also, return the feed on my piece 'inseparable' thanks.

  4. #4
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    a few years ago my alias use to be GRIM, though i was real fresh
    and a million people had it at the time, i havent dropped anything
    of note on the net in a few, and the site i used to frequent is ghost
    thanx for the feed, and invite to ya crew, but i dont know if i should
    commit right now, if i can stay active ill get at you ...if thats strait
    peace thanx for the feed will check your piece out after some eats
    hungry as fuck lol...

  5. #5
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    raizin hell,

    yall know the deal, leave links will def return the feed...chea!!!!

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    born and raized...

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    Is a ninja Lauren.'s Avatar
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    this was a dope piece even though it seemed long. Your metas and multies were sick and the topic was original...kinda disturbing though lol. Really though, the wording and phrases were amazing, and the flow was pretty good throughout. Your rhyming and structure sometimes confused me, but the way you showed different perspectives is cool. This was definitely a complex piece with good vocab. Good job on this one

  8. #8
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    thanx for the feed, just leave a link...will def...rtf

  9. #9
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    Re: The Assassination of Christianity

    leave links, i will mos def return the feed

  10. #10
    Compositional Standard Spoken's Avatar
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    Re: The Assassination of Christianity

    this was a great amount of skill and use of vocaba nd wordage nah maean man seriously you dropped very very good and the content you executed was great. your story was just unique as it is so you elaborating on the detail word ofr word and emotion tagging along was justa nice mixture and it really ashowed through the writing in this piece man great piece and a well worth read man really nice. you have a nice structure and vocab nothing really seemed forced nor over-used so nice job man

    RTF
    link in my sig man!
    ARTIFICIAL | PO'ETHICS | INTELLIGENCE

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    Re: The Assassination of Christianity

    ..WHOA.
    The concept of this piece was amazing. written well with fine structure. also the topic was eye poping. the flow was okay but you showed some good vocabulary. mos props to that fam. Your carried out some good emotion, flowed deep into details. good job showing that good science.

    peep the sig...
    J-RocK

  12. #12
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    Re: The Assassination of Christianity

    thanx.... really appreciate the feed^^hit both of your links,
    leave links, i will mos def return the feed

  13. #13
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    Re: The Assassination of Christianity

    Shit this was long lol but i congratualte you on a very good piece...you can clearly notice that you have writing experiance and your multi's worked nicely in this piece...emotion in this piece was very good and it flowed well my friend...This had good vocab and was a good complex piece...Good Job.

    -Thomas
    Legend.
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    Meta. Convicts.
    18-0 Crew Record, 06-07 Best Crew.

  14. #14
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    Re: The Assassination of Christianity

    Fucking Wow.
    Amazing emotion, vocab., internals, multies,...

    Imagery was like I was there. It was a bit long but after the first lines only a fag would've slept on it. Lol.

    You had an interesting rhyme scheme which kept my attention to the piece also. You had consistant rhyming but it wasn't overdone. Despite the insane vocab. it didn't seem forced. The story of it just blew me away man. Fav. lines...

    I couldn’t have it id established ruthless habits for years
    mankind needed to see the reasons my procedures sincere
    Judis easily seeing treason kept deceiving you eagerly
    he believed in me … I dominate control all my scenery
    had the Romans allegiance see how they whipped you repeatedly
    you looked up at me begging me father give me the energy
    I remember smiling at you thinking suffer the penalties
    sacrificing you did more than any fucking atrocity
    simple truth is you became a challenge to my authority
    ^Nice.

    There are a few lines that had some akward wording but, that was extremely minor. Excellent piece man. Keep up.
    -Insert Sig-



  15. #15
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    Re: The Assassination of Christianity

    thanx appreciate the feed Mazerka, just leave links mos def RTF ^^ hit all the links

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