The Siren's Deception

[Lucid.]

The Siren's Deception

Her voice, it sings to me an irresistible beckoning
Her eyes, seducing me to return for her brand of abuse
Her lies give me the perfect reason to discard morality
Completing my longing soul, exchanging sanity for escape
Her kisses lull me in a state of rapturous ecstasy
Leading me to a utopia of perverse, sadist dreams
In exchange, I pledge obedience, a pact for my enslavement
My dark mistress of pain, my beloved atrocity
Intoxication of the blood, subjugation of the will,
I am this lifeless, mindless corpse
Don’t want my misery, this imperfect reality
She is the key to my escape
She bleeds me of my essence in exchange for tainted love
She desecrates my soul, with sedation as my reward
She drains my life force, replacing it with poison aftertastes
I am her living art, her mass destruction’s masterpiece
I have nothing to face, nothing to fear again
This venom’s just the thing to cure the virus known as life
My final sacrifice for her virulent paradise
Existence lost its value, I shall engulf myself in my own spite
Intoxication of the blood, subjugation of the will,
I am this lifeless, mindless corpse
Don’t want my misery, this imperfect reality
She holds the key to my escape
And dangles it above my face, as I lie helplessly awaiting death.
Choking on my abhorrence
Before my eyes flash my regrets
Her selfish love has bled me dry, her kiss leave me in excruciating pain
Her once-gentle voice now haunts me in my final hour
My dark mistress of pain, I sing my bitter ode to you
as you abandon me. I slowly fade away and gasp,
”Before you spread your epidemic once again, I’ll sing to you
my agonizing swansong, tyrant queen.”

[Lucid.]

Feedback please.

[...Text...]

damn nigga hot shit man felt this yo mad description def nomination for H.O.F. dopeness

[Lucid.]

mmk thanks i guess.

[Prince Escobar]

A few gramatical errors detracted from this overall product, as did the fact that it dragged a bit in the middle, but those minor flaws aside i was genuinely suprised with the quality of this piece, you wrote extremely well and drew me into your piece from right out of the gate, the imagery was good but what hooked me was your vocab and word choice, really good job man, 1luv.

[Lucid.]

Thank you.

[Spoken]

this was quite a seriously fanatic and suprising read we got here....very complex and very free emotion talking...though minor flaws fell on through this was a great and ENJOYABLE read...i extremely attached from the first line to the last.really set the tone from start to finish and you finished very strong and on a high NOTE!. nicely done dude... keep writing!.

RTF on my piece if possible!

[Liquid Content]

You suprised me here... the emotion and impact of this piece was very good and the way you discriped everything with the imagery and so vividly was great. your vocabulary was a little off and oyur wording was a bit off here and there along with some gramer errors but that aside it was a very good read. deffintly the best that i have seen from you yet.

Return the favor on my piece Crossword

[Messiah.]

The emotion and imagery in this were dope and they impacted on the piece nicely.....Your vocabulary was alryt but could have been better.....your flow was good in this and it read easy.....I did enjoy this piece it was a good read good job.