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Thread: Beyond Deaths Horizon

  1. #1
    Banned SIX6's Avatar
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    Arrow Beyond Deaths Horizon

    Beyond Deaths Horizon

    Derived from the basis, look'd upon, from the eyes of replacements
    Forms the ties of lies.........arise.......from the lives of abasements*
    Obligated and anxious, I strive...................for high approbations*
    This feel'n of Apprehension*....................aspire's my assignation*
    I bow to his graces.........................and vow in loud supplication*
    Sanguine*, he'll atone me........................from past pertubation*
    First and last of creations......pearly gates.......the last of locations
    Died and now face to face.....................what a massive occassion
    But soon an emotion correction................from un-spoken deception
    He speaks.."I know you've sin'd, but before i ask im open to questions"
    I spoke with respect.........look'd up........words thrown in direction
    I started small......................."Is this where souls are collected?"
    He froze in objection....stated..."I made you, your known for deflections"
    "Fear not thee..........cuz in the end..........im your only projection"
    I took note of the messege.....thoughts gleaned*....i've chosen his methods
    Asked "Can I see my life, viewed from eyes, and closed to discrections?"
    My hope's again lessened....................I was tested with the cause
    Did my best for the cause....................but was left with a pause
    "Too much stress for me God".............."Neva messed with the laws"
    "If my gifts a curse.....then why should i be blessed with these flaws?"
    Garrulous*, but still i was imperturbable* he said "No reason to grieve"
    "Cuz in your times of need..............came and kept faith inside me"
    So its not when it seems............................when i start realize'n
    It's just you, him, and words......................behind deaths horizon

  2. #2

  3. #3
    da-one
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    dat shit was mad hard dawg
    i liked dat shit from begginig to da end
    keep dat shit coming

  4. #4
    Banned SIX6's Avatar
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    WoRD^...................more feeds.............

  5. #5
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    sum gd shit drop
    flow was decent
    rhymth was cool
    atructure kk
    keep@it

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    Shit Happens
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  6. #6
    Banned SIX6's Avatar
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    More feeds............ppl..............woRD<

  7. #7
    You've Earned a Custom Title! A.O.D's Avatar
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    It had a wonderful message to it, wordplay was awsome..not to fond of the stucture but it worked in this case... nice job

    BTW the vocab...OMG it was blended in wonderfully!!!!

    Did my best for the cause....................but was left with a pause
    "Too much stress for me God".............."Neva messed with the laws"
    "If my gifts a curse.....then why should i be blessed with these flaws?"
    ^^ My favorite

    LATE
    I'm not back...I'm simply bored out of my mind.
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  8. #8

    My Boy is on FIRE

    Man, that's hotter than LAVA! Aint to much real out there! I gotta say that's the real deal.. Keep on keepin on!
    Cali Conz

    www.caliconz.com

  9. #9
    Banned Rancor's Avatar
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    Nice flowing and wordplay, the vocab was unique and so was the rhymes, the structure was aight and fitted well with the concept and rhymes, good message and good OM, keep going at it

  10. #10
    Banned SIX6's Avatar
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    good looks.............................more feeds...........word<

  11. #11
    bobericc _Lyrics's Avatar
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    lmao @ your last line "behind deaths horizon" shudda said beyond*.
    vocab: 9.4/10
    concept: 8.8/10
    interest: 9.2/10
    storyline: 8.8/10
    imaginary: 8.3/10 <<<shudda made it longer describing heaven a lil bit more.

    i luved it, it was a nice piece. only sicc's6 ppl cud think of it. many props. nuttin new, or extra from my expectations, dont get gassed.
    ~1~
    GreaterDesignGrowers.com

    Im not a rapper, im a gardener

  12. #12
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    i enjoyed this piece man real dope right here
    good flow,wordplay, the vocab was also dope so good job man

  13. #13
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    WOW!Very powerfull piece. It inspires me to open up my Bible and come back down to Earth.
    Om's

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  14. #14
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    Drop kk
    Structure alrite
    Flow nice
    Vocab improvin
    keep@it

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    Shit Happens
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  15. #15
    Banned SIX6's Avatar
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    WoRD^

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