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Thread: Duel of Honour (ft. Aeschylus`)

  1. #1
    Still in the grave Johnny 6-feet's Avatar
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    Duel of Honour (ft. Aeschylus`)

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=263223

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...=263026&page=2




    Duel of Honour-

    They say the blood of a man turns cold at the time he kills his own.
    Aeschylus`- The Mission

    The banging of thunder.......I crash as lightning on the nestlings
    Because the best time to deliver is when they are unsuspecting
    The crimson water runs to the depths of hell and my pain is ceased
    This thing for keeps, i collect and dissappear to the depths
    With this one job left, me and my comrade can finally rest
    The King and his men, surrounded by the entire french army
    But for a quick time in the day, they may not unarm me
    I delivered the blow, a sort af Thwack that left the king trappped
    "Fuck the royal family"
    He couldn't believe it, one of his closest friends would stab his back
    Hell brought to life, an inferno around just the three of us
    not room for much, so we started our job, but the king was mighty in fact
    Every blow my comrad sent, his sword would send two back
    Fuck that, we attacked a stab and it was all the king could do to say
    "We were family......how could you do this to me?"
    .
    finally
    that ended the chapter, i was free... but i felt as cold as a stone...


    Johnny 6-feet- The Escape

    They say the blood of a man turns cold at the time he kills his own
    ...And that once innocence is lost it always feels alone
    The rebellion was sounded by the spark of gunpowder
    Walls caved in with falling masonry, cries returned much louder
    The king gurgled, a red river pouring from his spine
    Soldiers swarmed the assassins, anger roaring from the mind
    The castle was swarmed, royal battalions were drawn
    Into columns to stem the mercenaries, parrying harm
    The killers made their escape across rooves and balconies
    Dodging muskets shot from marksmen, and were about to leave
    But a unit barred their way, swords gleaming, fire in eyes
    Knife throws and razor steel made them expire and rise
    The sunset matched the intensity of the building ablaze
    And the new age was dawning at the end of the wave
    It was a honourable duel but with dark intent
    A dicatator overthrown and his spark was spent





    Word.

    SS League Record 31-8
    SS HW Champ
    14 x OM HoF



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  2. #2
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    dope......................no words to describe------------DOPE

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    Thnx, uppin for feed eeps nice verse johnny

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    You've Earned a Custom Title! Donald Trump's Avatar
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    yeah man dope evry part of this was dope flow,Image good shit to both Johnny did a dope hjob on his part n so dis Aes keep em coming

  5. #5
    All Things Must Pass. Issue's Avatar
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    ^STFU. To the 'Dope' dude.

    Ahhh, Smeagol , I liked your verse, man, I told you already. i liked your take on it and it almost fell into poetic form in parts, a nice read too with some interesting vocabulary. Johnny Pothead, as always, an interesting verse with plenty or real imagery and a nice multi to finish it off.

    Sorry for the light feed, playing LOTR with Sinner! Hahahahah.

    Oh, and

    William Nolan

  6. #6
    El Pistolero Keyser's Avatar
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    Hello there...........

    Cool piece this was, you both had good imagery in here and a nice flow throughout each of your verses, i think the concept isnt the easiest to pull off but you did it well, keeping it intresting throughout with good vocab and consistent imagery, aes i liked the way you kind of changed style to make it more poetic (well thats the feeling i got) as we all know part of poetry doesnt have to rhyme as long as there is feeling there in which you succeded in most parts......Johhny i think the most comfortable thing about reading you verse was the flow and you got the feeling across in a pretty short verse very well, also enjoyed the rhyme scheme probably more so than aes's verse but despite two contrasting styles imo helped it.

    Good writing both of you.

  7. #7
    too good to be true
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    This was very good. Flow was on point and imagery was there. The vocab was very good too imo. I liked the topic and enjoyed the read. It is rare for a colab to both keep the topic going, but you two pulled it off quite nice. Keep it up.

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=263357
    ^Feed would be appreciated.

  8. #8
    You've Earned a Custom Title! 2_sides_of_life's Avatar
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    The banging of thunder.......I crash as lightning on the nestlings
    Because the best time to deliver is when they are unsuspecting
    The crimson water runs to the depths of hell and my pain is ceased
    This thing for keeps, i collect and dissappear to the depths
    With this one job left, me and my comrade can finally rest



    The killers made their escape across rooves and balconies
    Dodging muskets shot from marksmen, and were about to leave
    But a unit barred their way, swords gleaming, fire in eyes
    Knife throws and razor steel made them expire and rise
    The sunset matched the intensity of the building ablaze
    And the new age was dawning at the end of the wave




    Nice

  9. #9
    Ass status_unknown's Avatar
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    This was original, clever, and interesting. Abstract could fit in the picture, as well. The one thing i didnt like about is the lack of detail as far as a storyline goes -
    this type of piece could have definately had some more direction; a beginning, middle and end, so to say. Apart from that, however; it was a good piece. Interesting to read but not articulate enough for my taste.

    Props though.

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=263389

    Return

  10. #10
    lyrical messiah
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    nice peice. both of you had great imagery an use of words an some vocab but i would like to read the beginning of how this got started so i think you should make the intro

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    Dope Lethal Lyricists
    hip-hop's finest souljaz

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    this my boo.......guess who it is

  11. #11
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    Holler, uppin fellas.

  12. #12
    GENIUS
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    ye word. nice imagery, n d collab stuck together. it wuz a tight piece. a gud read, keep it up. n rtf on d gates of hell piece in my sig please.

  13. #13
    You've Earned a Custom Title!
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    hall of fame material,
    this was dope lads,
    from the flow down to the structure and vocab
    this piece was very very good

    keep doin ur things
    I'm So ILL I'm Terminal!

    Vote On My Battles


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    Leave Feed On My Om's

  14. #14
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    thnx guys....uppin.

  15. #15
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    yuppin.......

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