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Thread: I Write, Therefore, I Am

  1. September 8th, 2005, 03:02 AM #1
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    Quostopher Vican ..?'s Avatar
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    I Write, Therefore, I Am

    I Write, Therefore, I Am

    I've got my mind at gun-point, askin for answers
    Cuz I been droppin lines to the point where I set standards
    Flows been gold for ages, rhymes are almost timeless
    Punches bend audiences inside out until they spineless
    My punches are coated with sugar, and to this day
    All you fuckin biters smile while hatin.. while ya mouth decays
    Now put together that wordplay, if you have half a brain
    Cuz the other half can't comprehend all the MC's I've slain
    And laid waste, single handedly I've dropped crews
    And used to rip keystyles, even split duos in twos
    I write because I am..a MC, a gifted typist
    a thug, a battler, a poet.. even a fuckin white kid
    A man with a tongue, two hands, and a heart..see
    I got a lot of heart, that hits harder then any beat
    And rips apart any MC, from ya hair down to your seat
    Ink isn't what I fuckin dot my i's with, it's what I bleed
    Hip Hop isn't just suitable, it's a crucible
    And I'm lovin it from head to toe, eyelash to cuticles
    I've wrote for a decade plus, so you gotta trust
    That it's not just in my mind, it's deep within my guts
    I write, therefore, I am, if it's a sin then I'll be damned
    These are my thoughts, as the pen rolls through my hands....
    WordPerfect.

    Thinkin bout when we first learned to use rubbers/
    He never learned so in turn, I'm kidnappin his baby's mother/
    My hand around her collar, feedin her cheese/
    She said the taste of dollars was shitty, so i fed her 50's/- Jay-Z
  2. September 8th, 2005, 03:28 AM #2
    Lil Fire
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    this piece was aight i like your vocabulary and wordplay was pretty nice as well the topic i actually did like and this was actually an intresting piece to read i liked the ending it was nice overall a nice piece keep it up
    Say wha??
  3. September 8th, 2005, 03:42 AM #3
    Seedy
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    My punches are coated with sugar, and to this day
    All you fuckin biters smile while hatin.. while ya mouth decays
    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^Dope Line

    But i feel like you came with a basic flow, i mean you didnt come that hard to make me get interested.........I feel like you can elevate alot if you work at it, You got alot goin for you homie........
    PM for battle
  4. September 8th, 2005, 04:36 AM #4
    Vortex
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    ^ `basic flow` ?! hahaha, this flowed like butter man. it was easy to read. the RHYME SCHEME was the basic thing, but that didnt matter in this drop cos that wasnt what he was going for. i thought the verse was cool, lost the pace it had built up towards the end, but this opening section was dope:

    I've got my mind at gun-point, askin for answers
    Cuz I been droppin lines to the point where I set standards
    Flows been gold for ages, rhymes are almost timeless
    Punches bend audiences inside out until they spineless

    on some Copywrite shit with that right there. dope read bro. keep posting.
    I am the rap king, that wears lots of bling,
    Im from the ghettos, of Netto.
    Its the place to be. Come down and you'll see. - Phillip Round


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  5. September 8th, 2005, 09:25 AM #5
    warchild
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    I really liked this verse but the only thing i didnt like was the flow it was weak, if you know what flow means then you know what im talking about.
    If you dont i mean your syllable rhyming is weak, but i liked the piece because of the vocab and wordplay it was really strong so if you can work on your flow your verses could be even nicer. I think this could of stood out more if you added in some crazy metaphors and punchlines.
    Good piece.

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    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=229664
  6. September 8th, 2005, 12:08 PM #6
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    Point out where the flow is weak please. Thanks. You don't leave feed saying that unless you can point that out. I wasn't trying for some out-rageous text flow anyways. I just kept it solid.

    Thanks for the feed tho. And nah I won't peep your shit war.
    WordPerfect.

    Thinkin bout when we first learned to use rubbers/
    He never learned so in turn, I'm kidnappin his baby's mother/
    My hand around her collar, feedin her cheese/
    She said the taste of dollars was shitty, so i fed her 50's/- Jay-Z
  7. September 9th, 2005, 11:12 PM #7
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    spinal food.
    WordPerfect.

    Thinkin bout when we first learned to use rubbers/
    He never learned so in turn, I'm kidnappin his baby's mother/
    My hand around her collar, feedin her cheese/
    She said the taste of dollars was shitty, so i fed her 50's/- Jay-Z
  8. October 9th, 2005, 11:20 PM #8
    youngprophecy
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    IM not gunna lie... that was some of the illest shit.. keep up
  9. October 10th, 2005, 05:42 AM #9
    Johnny 6-feet
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    This has been up for 4 weeks and you haven't left links? I know you know the rules.

    Closed.

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