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Thread: Leap of Faith

  1. #1
    microcosm spokenoh's Avatar
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    Leap of Faith

    A mirrored reflection; cracked into segments of broken glass
    I'll only cut my wrists with a hopeless past
    Hoping that these traintracks will lead to new beginnings
    Not a tattered wrist, grippin’ my stainless steel decisions
    in a shattered fist; elegant fingers found in delicate bones
    Perception is naked to but veiled to whatever isn’t shown,
    alone I inhale the stale scents of the habor’s bay
    Close to reality as your ghost flows farther away
    I’ll stay, porched like the city street pigeons upon my dominion
    Twenty-five stories, with one life, above the sanctuary called “opinions”
    All these people, stressed and perhaps nerve-wracked
    looking into a parted sky with price-tagged cherubs & seraphs
    funnelling out of condemned buildings where over ten million
    Find the purpose of life in high pursuits of alcohol percents & women
    Imagine. . .what if a phantom just swept their foundation-
    What if the time’s marble beauty was just cracked concrete
    now ancient?
    Vacant parks appeal to the homeless who only own less
    because they hold their beliefs over the reliefs of other grown men
    Understand that David’s herds of sheep have been replaced
    or butchered for the sake that we sleep on the comfort of deaths taken place
    Laugh today, cry tomorrow - prolonge the apocalypse
    we either live, and let die ‘cause I don’t know what the other option is
    We’ll only judge the truth on the virtues we see first
    so I’ll test the people’s faith by stepping off my high standards
    feet first

    I figured I'd leave RB in classic style, dropping a final poem. Enjoy.

  2. #2
    You always say you're leaving, but you never really do.

    Is this real this time?

  3. #3
    microcosm spokenoh's Avatar
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    Yes.

  4. #4
    ...practice makes poetry
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    twas very nice for an om/poem...

    and that really has to be pointed out as far as i'm concerned, classic rhyming couplets that join with multies in the next line, that's my style bitch

    errmm, okay i didn't think this was gonna be about the world and society in general but then it went there and stayed, didn't ramble.

    a fairly obvious way of explaining things, at least to me... some great quotables for sure

    "I’ll stay, porched like the city street pigeons upon my dominion
    Twenty-five stories, with one life, above the sanctuary called “opinions”"
    ^smoking with a steady cadence/meter... i should say, 'flow'

    "Laugh today, cry tomorrow - prolonge the apocalypse
    we either live, and let die ‘cause I don’t know what the other option is
    We’ll only judge the truth on the virtues we see first
    so I’ll test the people’s faith by stepping off my high standards
    feet first"
    ^now this part didn't 'flow' or whatever, granted we have a 'poem' here, but what really struck me was the truth of your statements

    one of the handful of times I felt some real honesty in your work, which is way more than most people have ever showed me...

    kudos and we'll talk later
    Hence Forward

  5. #5
    It's good luke.
    Great way to finish up.

  6. #6
    Word is Bond Sublime D's Avatar
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    good poem...

    flows nicely when read...

    nice vocabulary, adequate...

    cohesive story...progression of events was smooth...

    lines link together well...

    a complete work...
    Bittersweet

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