Bastard's Bible

[warchild]

I inhale the devils air and exhale jesus in his truest form
Now you can picture the world as it is just a judas storm
The bible is the way to control those who are scared of self
The reason i dont reside with religion is that im bare of wealth
My soul is still stirring and my mind is the spoon
My voice is my safety but my rhymes are my doom
Im hardheaded so my mind will not change over time
So dont assume that im intoxicated this is my sober mind
If god does exist how come babies are still dying?
And how come a lot of these ladies are still crying?
When their husbands put their fists to their face
Then they go back and put risks to their fate
People getting filled with bullets over sneakers and chains
If you havent been through struggle im the teacher of pain
My life is like a curse but without the gift
My knife is like a verse but without the wit
Innocent and an angel are words seldom used to describe me
I feel like the devil and a better life walk right beside me
Im close to the devil a better life is hard to reach
My reach is weighed down by my rage i guard my speech
FUCK THAT i gotta point out you gotta treat the world with caution
im probably gonna perish quicker than my kid after my girls abortion
Im a loud mouth prick so excuse my odd sentence
Look at the life youve lived do you still believe in gods presence?

This just a verse i wrote 10 minutes ago kind of a questioning piece.
Take your time with it dont skim through it actually read it .

[warchild]

Links:
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=185081
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=185075

[momo]

the flow was ok but , niggas need to quit rapping about jesus,the reason u dont reside with religion is your personal choice all the things u listed are the same things rappers have been saying,"if god exist why are babies dying,"etc thats all been said and thats wack, why are u even alive if god doesn't exist, why do u have the gift to rhyme, they are all why questions and i mean i wasnt feelin it but like i said we all rap diffrent we all from a diffrent place if u came to texas niggas would laugh but like i said u rap diffrent that aint bad i just wasnt feelin that flow dog .

[Germ]

yes, that is first thing i will mention, flow at the start was choppy, but it picked up later....i feel this was a very emtional piece and tell you have lived the experience, i also found most of it to be very true and this was a very relatable piece, which is a good way to write....since it was done in 10 min, i wont nag on structure or multies and what not, strong piece man, keep up

[bluntman66]

flow did start off slow but came together.
nice drop, worth the read
peace

[elementdeluxx]

A man i dont got no prob. with u rappin about jesus. anywat that shit was hott and it was different so keep it up. Labels luv different things

[warchild]

There aint nothing wrong with the flow in this piece if you actually know what flow means my flow is mad nice. UPPIN.

[Ħŷċōŋčëþťś]

That was nice overall. Some lines played out, but damn, how can someone be so original in dis got damn fuckin bitch ass world! Impossible, its like Jesus and hell mixted together hellno, it willnever happen. Hy

[$iNi<AL.<iTY]

It's an ok verse, like the others say "your flow needs help" so dont say its "nice" cause its not, dont get me wrong this was a nice verse, with imaginary, but little emotion, upp your vocab. People "do" really need to stop rapping about jesus cause it's getting played out, yes "played out".


Pz

[warchild]

My LIFE is like a CURSE but without the GIFT
My KNIFE is like a VERSE but without the Wit
My soul is still stirring and my MIND is the SPOON
My voice is my safety but my RHYMES are my DOOM
People getting filled with bullets over SNEAKERS and CHAINS
If you havent been through struggle im the TEACHER of PAIN
FUCK THAT i gotta point out you gotta treat the WORLD WITH CAUTION
I'll probably perish quicker than my kid after my GIRLS ABORTION

Ive wrote in big bold capitals the words which show you my flow my flow aint ok its nice most of you dont know what flow is FLOW IS GOOD SYLLABLE RHMING CHECK THE SYLLABLES AGAIN ARE YOU FUCKING BLIND?
YES I THINK YOU FUCKING ARE.

[Ink Thesis]

dope shit..

but i believe in God tho..

but still, rap is rap and i respect any dope shit posted no matter the topic..

keep it up.

peace

[TProphet]

NIce Concept....You Tryed Hard To Carry It Through...But You Didnt Really Explain It Very Well....I Had To Read Through It A Cuple Of Times To Make Perfectly Sure That I Was Correct In Seeing Wha You Was Askin...Fucc This Flow Arguement...If Tha Flow Is All Good In Your Mind And In How You Say It...Thn Tha Flow Will Be On Point...I Liked Tha Different Questions You Asked Throughout Tha Piece And Als Tha Different Metaphorical Lines...Nice Drop

Thnx For Tha Feed On Mine