User Tag List

Showing results 1 to 9 of 9

Thread: Blinded By Battle

  1. #1
    .:Fuck You:. Reeco's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Posts
    1,175
    Battle Record
    18-5

    Blinded By Battle

    Blinded By Battle
    Written By Timeless

    Into the night their weapons fired; and the
    Night grew into day
    The soldiers marched into the battle
    Heads held high,
    Elite, were they

    Countries challenged other countries
    Oceans crossed, the lands destroyed
    United, soldiers marched in battle
    Naval ships and jets employed
    Tens of thousands would be heroes
    Raged against their fellow man
    Young or old, it made no difference
    Over countless hills they ran
    Fearless in their quest for victory
    They stood tall and took their aim
    Hit and felled intended targets
    Ever strong the soldiers came

    Blinded in the rage of battle
    Loosing not, to claim defeat
    Into war, they carried onward
    Nameless faces on the street
    Donned with guns and bullets many
    Officers to guide their way
    Never fearing, they moved onward
    Lighting darkest night to day
    Years of careful preparation and
    The best of weaponry
    Half the world enjoined together
    Engaged in battle to be free

    Only one can be the victor
    Now the final hour’s here
    Each man stands against the other
    Each refuses to show fear
    Yielding never, they continue
    Endless gunshots fill the air
    Dying soldiers fall beside them
    Masks of death, their comrades wear
    Every man no longer thinking
    Numb and blind beyond compare
    All or nothing!” scream their leaders
    Resounding shouts, “the victory’s near!”
    Early morning light arises
    Killed and wounded lie in wait
    In the final stage of battle
    No one recognized their fate
    Guns once roaring, now are silent
    ~and with the rising of the sun
    Screams of pain have all grown quiet
    ~a war was fought, but no one won


    In The Country Of The Blind Only The One Eyed Men Are Kings
    Last edited by Reeco; August 5th, 2004 at 11:46 AM
    .

    -An Original RB Member: Yes, We're That Much Doper Than You-


    .

  2. #2
    .:Fuck You:. Reeco's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Posts
    1,175
    Battle Record
    18-5
    .

    -An Original RB Member: Yes, We're That Much Doper Than You-


    .

  3. #3
    Fear Before The March Foreshadow's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Location
    Portland, Oregon
    Posts
    3,107
    Battle Record
    8-8
    This was real good you know. I like how you did the sentence on the side of it and it turned out real good. You had nice imagery and your details were great nice work.

  4. #4
    .:Fuck You:. Reeco's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Posts
    1,175
    Battle Record
    18-5
    thanks..............i'll reply to yours soon..............uppin
    .

    -An Original RB Member: Yes, We're That Much Doper Than You-


    .

  5. #5
    .:Fuck You:. Reeco's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Posts
    1,175
    Battle Record
    18-5
    uppin
    .

    -An Original RB Member: Yes, We're That Much Doper Than You-


    .

  6. #6
    .:Fuck You:. Reeco's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Posts
    1,175
    Battle Record
    18-5
    i cant belive this is getting slept on after all the poem's i've replied to
    .

    -An Original RB Member: Yes, We're That Much Doper Than You-


    .

  7. #7
    In The Shadows... ILLusions's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Location
    Pittsburgh
    Posts
    400
    Battle Record
    2-0
    Nice concept....I have seen some of these but this one definetly stood out from the ranks of the rest. I mean the vocab, structure, flow, everything seemed to fall in place.

    I mean the message and story you got across was good to read plus it didn't get boring when you read it. Nice drop man.......

    "Only one can be the victor
    Now the final hour’s here
    Each man stands against the other
    Each refuses to show fear
    Yielding never, they continue
    Endless gunshots fill the air
    Dying soldiers fall beside them
    Masks of death, their comrades wear"

    ^^^^

    Good part!


    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=140645

    ^^^^

    Feedback would be appreciated......
    ~Understream~


    Lost somewhere...


    "Striving for excellence motivates you; striving for perfection is demoralizing."
    - Harriet Braiker

  8. #8
    .:Fuck You:. Reeco's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Posts
    1,175
    Battle Record
    18-5
    up................................................
    .

    -An Original RB Member: Yes, We're That Much Doper Than You-


    .

  9. #9
    Word is Bond Sublime D's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Buffalo, NY
    Age
    37
    Posts
    3,744
    Battle Record
    1-12
    this is very good, i enjoyed it much, simple flow, but it wa sa near flawless simple flow and structure...this is up to your usual standards, and i liek the acronym effect..even though it's nto an acromyn, i forgot what those poems are called where u have the lettes at the beginning of each lien say something..i knwo what it's called, but i can't remember, adn i dont feel like trying to think of it...anyway..very good, simple

    9.3/10
    Bittersweet

Similar Threads

  1. Blinded From Truth
    By zelf in forum Poetic Scriptures
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: April 12th, 2015, 04:36 PM
  2. Blinded By The Light
    By The Nav Man™ in forum Open Mic
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: December 14th, 2010, 09:07 PM
  3. Blinded by the Light
    By Arkan in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: January 2nd, 2009, 03:40 AM
  4. Blinded
    By the_origin in forum Open Mic
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: May 1st, 2008, 11:44 PM
  5. Blinded.
    By Twixn... in forum Open Mic
    Replies: 15
    Last Post: April 28th, 2006, 10:49 PM

Posting Rules

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •