Space As I Know It

[I Am Unreal.]

They say aspiring astronauts are admiral souls
Advocating life’s questions by amending a role
They’re consoled by a zephyr’s breeze… eased
By a better tether chaining Earth to human beings
Space is perceived as
“The infinite extension of the three-
Dimensional region… in which all matter exists”
But to me it seems to be an end to a means
Where bliss escapes me and explores my needs
I employ these themes, different as contrasted, but
Sometimes I wonder…
“Does space go on forever?
Or do we just make it such?”
I had a hunch, go in search, find truth and live life
But as infinite was defined by…
“Unlimited in spatial extent”
…………………………………My insight died…
I knew I’d never know the answers until life passed
Or else I’d be chasing something that didn’t exist.
.............................
Will you ever resist the tale of a child so weary,
To ask out a girl that he loved so dearly?
He’d write “sincerely, anonymous” to sign his post
It was monotonous; clearly a girl can’t see a ghost
So she stopped looking, and the boy lost all hope
And the story goes; it’s the same for every timid boy
But how is timid defined?
If you say “Lacking self-confidence”
You’re out of your mind.
See, being timid is simply being shy,
Some would say that clouds sometimes hide the sky…
So we see eye to eye.
Because there are stars out there just as shy as our great sun
And another life form is likely taking to every one…
So one day when I become my own shooting star
I’ll talk to a wise and aged poet…
I know it’s not fact. It’s just space as I know it.

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...94#post4040294
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...70#post4040470

[J.Christ]

They say aspiring astronauts are admiral souls
Advocating life’s questions by amending a role
They’re consoled by a zephyr’s breeze… eased
By a better tether chaining Earth to human beings

beginning was alright , i was feel'n it .


The drop was nice, stayed on topic and that's what matter's keep it up . but i wouldnt buy your album if you had these lyrics on song personally .

Keep at it, next time give me something i can get hype to .

[I Am Unreal.]

thanks, not tryin to make an album though, just some creative writin' to keep me goin..

[+Glich+]

Yeah I liked the beggining alot but then it started to drop a little bit but it was still nice man decent drop in my opnion not alot of multies but it was cool I'm a multi dude thats what i like to see and I like to write nice creativity on this piece overall decent drop but on your next one add some multi's so I can enjoy it more okay ~1~

[Spekz]

Alright u started nice much like they said then ur middle got a lil schetchy, other than for the middle part of ur drop.....u had some good flow,ok vocab(could be upd a bit), wordplay was decent...seemd more of a poem in some parts, could use more multies or internal rhyming (which u did have here and there)....i think the main thing that hurt this piece was consistancy.....cuz u had some nice imagery in certain parts aswell and fell of in others....you need to be able to keep the topic at a full sprint...juss powerful from start to finish



Space is perceived as
“The infinite extension of the three-
Dimensional region… in which all matter exists”
But to me it seems to be an end to a means
Where bliss escapes me and explores my needs
I employ these themes, different as contrasted, but
Sometimes I wonder…
“Does space go on forever?
Or do we just make it such?”
I had a hunch, go in search, find truth and live life
But as infinite was defined by…
“Unlimited in spatial extent”
…………………………………My insight died…
I knew I’d never know the answers until life passed
Or else I’d be chasing something that didn’t exist.



^^THIS PART however had some nice info,and was very like well spoken for...was not well written.....no good rhymescheme,flow,wordplay.etc


HOWEVER...

FAVORITE LINES:

They say aspiring astronauts are admiral souls
Advocating life’s questions by amending a role
They’re consoled by a zephyr’s breeze… eased
By a better tether chaining Earth to human beings
^^just flowd nicely,wrdplay etc...overall nice

I’ll talk to a wise and aged poet…
I know it’s not fact. It’s just space as I know it.
^^no overally complex..juss liked it

KEEP ON WRITING...got some things 2 work on ..but keep on keepin on igh


****PLEASE HIT UP MY OM.."BARBARIC BRILLIANCE", LINK IN SIG!.....already got 1 nomination for OMHOF!..so plz hit it up

[Atti]

I really like this man... Now I know what you mean when you say we have similar styles, Im thinking its because of that poetic side that we both have. Loooooooooved the flow and how it complimented the content beautifully. It never really got to predictable which I really like. The content was very nice aswell, original and to me this was very heartfelt and didnt feel like you were striving for anything... But rather just writing from the soul. Great piece man, and ya... We're deffinately going to have to collab sometime (AIM: Brownnumber18) Get at me sometime and we can set something up.

[Breannah]

wasnt too bad
i'd just say that u need to work on stronger flow to this and structure mainly ineteresting piece though good imagery

[Ryan]

this was a dope piece pimpin...keep it up

[Automatic.]

Wow, this was pretty impressive. I wasnt feeling the topic at first about space and all but u flipped it and took a nice approach to it. I liked the drop alot, flowed well and was easy to read. It had a poetic style to it which i liked. Nice piece all together. Keep it up.