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Thread: Why Is Silence So Deafening?

  1. #1
    Banned Eye`'s Avatar
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    Why Is Silence So Deafening?

    Why Is Silence So Deafening?

    Sitting alone in the absence of light,
    Drinking a beer, rocking my chair,
    Staring into a bottomless glare,
    Heart pounding to a red-line blare,


    For days I've been impaired, death became more often caught,
    the uproar of an aid-needed creature soon known was my own thoughts
    my sense of hearing was gone, though the warmth of evil lurks my wits,
    the spit from this monster sunk into my wrists and blissfully healed the slits
    Though not was all good, still-life's soon came to be true,
    not knowing that a spirit could break you down and mentally kill you
    Living a life with no purpose, and when push came to shove...
    we all discover when we hit hell's floor, that we meet tortured angels from above.

    Suddenly, without a conscious care,
    Are weird sensations in a quiet sphere,
    The faintest vibration of long ago cheers,
    Laughter, and intensive images of tears,


    Reflections from mirrors, you'll soon hear the eerie noise of strength,
    I quiver with fear as I'm being tortured, pulled with a rope at arm's length
    deafened by the silence, how can this be, how is it true?!
    Why am I alone in this torture chamber, why did God make the cruel and rude?
    No clothes no food to offer me, the mum of voices were troubling,
    I kept calm and cool, though I saw my peripheral vision doubling
    and with a snap of a stranger's hand, I awoke from my trance and glanced up,
    I asked millions of powerful questions, but just got anonymous answers.

    Someone is lying prostrate on the floor,
    Pleading his case, begging and bare,
    With promises galore, a bargain is bore,
    A seal on the door, but no one is there.


    Mildly cold I find myself, stuck in a dungeon,
    strings attached to my back, I tense my legs, but I'm not even running
    unknown to outsiders, my disappearance was obscure,
    I'm knowingly sure that my life has ended by murder
    my blood was pure, reddened liquid, forming on my skin,
    with tubes stuck through my nose, chest, both forearms and chin
    and patiently waiting for my savior, listening in despair,
    deafened to silence beneath the lair, breath shortened from dirty air.

    History that began as a trickle is flooding
    my soul. Opportunities missed, a word
    here, a word there, a stroking of her hair,
    But in an instant I'm back in my chair.


    I stare through the eyes of man, who is clearly threatened by me,
    so with that excuse he can enslave me for eternity
    and by my knowledge of God, I think of the Holy Trinity,
    because without my loving father I couldn't survive this life for infite
    my divinity was belittled, endurity was underestimated,
    I tried to escape his wrath often times, but now that I've contemplated
    I cannot evade his force, but by the power from deep within,
    I've let loose, grabbed him, and commited the Bible's every sin.

    A quiver shy of the three pounds needed.
    Grinding teeth with chalkboard screech,
    Blind and aching for the cold steel's relief,
    But the fermented courage fades to grief.

  2. #2

  3. #3
    The True Psycho of RB
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    Dope piece, concept was crazy and original which i always like cause originality is rare on this board so you get props straight away just for coming out with something original to write about. You told the story extremely well and them little snippets in between the verses really made the piece even better, the story kept me reading i never got bored with this piece which is always good. You told it from one perspective so it was a very focused piece, some times when people do pieces like this they do a half assed job with it and it really annoys but you kept this dope from beggining to end.
    The vocab was perfect nothing over the top so i could picture everything you was saying in the piece. Obviously your vocab helped you create some fantastic imagery, the line about breaking every law in the bible was a stand out to me. I couldnt quote lines because there would be a lot of quotes, this piece was brilliaint couldnt criticise fuck all except for maybe a few multies mixed in but fuck it this was a great verse.
    Return the feed on my new Om:
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=252317
    I got caught for killing time but then i got away with words-Chino XL

  4. #4
    Banned Eye`'s Avatar
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    Damn, your feed is mad long. Thanks though, bump!

  5. #5
    It's a big FUCK U Frostbite's Avatar
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    Yo u know that waz a dope peice when u posted it u got madd skillz
    I waz feelin evrything in this verse the emotion especially and ya vocab too flow waz sick and so waz ya wordplay

    Fo real u is a dope topical head fam
    Keep it up

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  6. #6
    Banned Eye`'s Avatar
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    Ok, thanks.

  7. #7
    Banned
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    This topic was definately different and certainly creatvie
    i liked the lay out of each verse and then the italic lines
    thats dope and i was feelin all of them..flow was smooth
    made it a easy read..strucutre was even...vocab was tight
    i enjoyed this drop a lot..truley a very dope one

    keep it up and check out ym latest Om honarable in action
    thanks and peace

  8. #8
    Dam..
    <<The real Renegade

  9. #9
    Banned Eye`'s Avatar
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    uh, Up.

  10. #10
    The Audio King .Silence.'s Avatar
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    I really liked reading this piece here.Your piece was really creative and I like that.Also I really like how you opened the piece in this.You also had really great Imagry and emotion in this piece cuz when I read it I could picture and feel what was going on here.And your structure was great.And also you had good use of your vocabulary in this piece.Overall this piece gets a 10/10 cuz its that good.Kepp up the good work I really liked reading this piece.Hope to see more soon.

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  11. #11
    You've Earned a Custom Title! pyro2472's Avatar
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    wow really great peice ill man pretty long thats not a bad thing my oms are long to but i was glad it was got to keep readin it really liked it hit up the battles in ma sig and leave feed on my oms
    war and will i

  12. #12
    Banned Eye`'s Avatar
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    thanks for the feedback.....Upping.

  13. #13
    Banned Eye`'s Avatar
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    word.

  14. #14
    Banned Eye`'s Avatar
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    ......

  15. #15
    Banned Eye`'s Avatar
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    eh, w/e, people sleep on me. pz.

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