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Thread: .. why shall thou exterminate?

  1. #1
    beyond dope.
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    .. why shall thou exterminate?

    .. why shall thou exterminate?

    .
    .
    .
    sweat and tears, pain and fear, whats next?
    the trains are loaded ..
    even w/ childeren i was perplexed
    by this tension, ''you will all be save''
    ''so now can i have your attention''
    ..oh wait and dead aswell soon

    but that` they forgot too mention
    so what is next? the train just kept rolling
    as the thoughts thru our heads,
    cause of this mind controlling
    ripping our will & believes too shreds
    ..full of bewilderment we couldnt resist,
    just had too go with the flow..
    its not even an option too subsist..
    .
    .
    .

    failing too reach..
    an exhilarating psychological state
    of pride and optimism and our thoughts were bleached
    blindfolded by darkness, and humanity wasnt shown
    the arrival was harsh, the location .. unknown
    .. but no nothing too worry about
    its just a trip, a trip too hell but they didnt tell..
    you will be reunited with your family soon,
    but the truth was just ..this is a farwell..`
    .
    .
    .

    so we continued in a line, the line of the doomed
    trapped,and its cold.. we just failed too grew
    like a flower that never bloomed..
    so they were guiding us too this shower,but nothing will happen ..
    thats what they assured
    ..but thats a undecipherable way of concealing just: too obscure!
    ''dont worry its just too prevent, disease-causing bacterium's ''
    .. but hello
    we are in a state of violent mental agitation,this is delirium!
    promisses made, yet hope just faded away,hours we prayed ..
    but it was useless.. cause those germans deployed..
    and left us w/ our prides destroyed ..there is nothing left
    .. they told us LIVE! but the bastards brought us death.




    a day in history .. a day in Auschwitsz .. another shot at exermination.


    *red is german thoughts/shoutings*
    Last edited by Edicius; April 23rd, 2005 at 06:41 AM

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    - Artificial Intelligence

  2. #2
    beyond dope.
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    replyed too

    Issue
    and
    Bounce

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    - Artificial Intelligence

  3. #3

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    by this tension, ''you will all be save''
    ''so now can i have your attention''
    ..oh wait and dead aswell soon
    but that` they forgot too mention

    dope rhyme scheme dope bar.

    overall this was very nice...schemes were
    up to your scratch very dope....flow was nice
    vocab was decent...structure your normal
    shit and it was nice cuase it makes you think.
    overall a very very nice drop edy...

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  4. #4
     
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    Another nice peice. OM is improving. Some dope concepts. I liked the way you included the quote sorta things in your verse. Nice storyline. I remember doing something like this but i was a herb then Flow was dope. A nice rhyme scheme.

    Fav Bar = so we continued in a line, the line of the doomed
    trapped,and its cold.. we just failed too grew
    like a flower that never bloomed..

    A very nice peice. Again im gonna nominate this

  5. #5
    That Shit Cray Chris Black's Avatar
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    This was cool shit. You probably know I like the topic from the last piece I dropped. Sometimes the rhyme scheme threw me off a little, but nothing major. Nice drop. Keep writing, homie.

    Also, Lol@"failed to grew".
    Hence Forward
    axis powers

  6. #6
    beyond dope.
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    Word, thanks for the replys people `

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    - Artificial Intelligence

  7. #7
    beyond dope.
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    da fuck ..

    go up!

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    - Artificial Intelligence

  8. #8
    Awh.Chew
    Guest
    ..I Like You Structure, Never Seen Anything Like It And Its Very Good, The Rhyme Scheme Is Wonderful. The Imagery And Emotion Is Great As Well. Lacking A Few Things, The Main One Is Vocabulary, But Other Than That, Its Superb..

    Rating: 8/10

    Return The Favor Please, My Link Is In My Sig

  9. #9
    2012
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    This shit was real cool. Deep, too. That rhyme scheme you used was tight. Not to much to say about this piece except that I liked it alot.

    Maybe you could hit this link...

    http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188593

    ...and drop a few pointers for us. Thx.
    You really think ur tough... come 'n try me man
    I’ll get a hiccup that isn’t spasms of the diaphragm

  10. #10
    beyond dope.
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    word, upper

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    - Artificial Intelligence

  11. #11
    beyond dope.
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    cough

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    - Artificial Intelligence

  12. #12
    im on da grind gangsta
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    any battles

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    check this its da movement baby

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