Formula - Open Your Eyes. . .

[FormulaSquared]

I tried to teach you man...

People is fucked up, hungry for money if the Price is Right..
Sell their soul to the devil, `cause the Price was Nice..
There`s a Price to Fight, and the price you`ll pay..
Equals our debts today, the right`s wrong in every way..
And whatever you say, is held to you in a court of law..
Freedom of Speech ? - You have none at all..
The dumb will fall, ignoranance may be bliss..
But if you swing at the system..
.. You ain`t aiming at the fence, you aiming to miss..
Claiming you this, banging w/ that, fall off track
And like a train broken down, you can never get back
On it, so you pawn it, your hopes and dreams flaunted
But once you run out of time..
.. The ghosts of the past come get your ass
.. And have you haunted
Task undaunted, you think your the shit, guess again
You get stabbed in the back by your man..
.. Who was next to kin
You better find the bad step and mend..
.. Everything that went sour
`Cause as you bobble, thinking you bravo
.. Your life fades away by the hour ..

[Chorus]
Reality - A bitch, but brand new for the fucking
You don`t believe it, it`s a shame it`s not bluffing
Please - Piece by piece, create a form of release
And let the demons seeping cease in their reach
For your life and your strife - a definate factor
In the reason you`re being is being shattered..
.. Open Your Eyes ..

Always asking me to understand where you coming from
When I know the place is shit because you running son
It`s nothing but - a broken down shack in a small town
Your dreams of leaving are small now, no mall crowds
So when your album`s out, you may sign two or three
Autographs and sell a couple dozen CD`s for free
That can`t be me - so i`ll travel the farthest lengths
To make sure your mark w/ ink never reaches extinct
But if the precinct is where you want to live, fine
But i`m working my ass off to watch your life decline
I`ve made up my mind, and my choice is to help you
I`m sure you remember when you gave me the demo
I was the only that felt you and I sent out that memo
In the paper, notifying everyone of my discovery
I just don`t need this whole ordeal to fluster me
The projected recovery of jail time is six years strong
And I don`t think I can put off anticipation for that long
My participation in this waiting is hesistating, i`m making
A decision that renders me helpless while you sit in prison
You haven`t lived up to expectations, can`t believe you let
Street issues form a venue in your mind set, just forget
Everything I said, I tried but failed, so listen man
I`m dismantling our relations and you ain`t even in a 'Band'

[Chorus]

I can`t believe I wasted so much time on you.. I tried to teach you shit.. now, you`ll never be shit all.. it`s a damn shame.. what I mentioned in the first verse.. that`s was what I taught you man.. don`t you remember?.. then I know the second verse brought back some memories didn`t it.. Your whole shit described in few bars.. that`s how important you were.. I tried man.. now i`ll see you in six.. you could`ve had your eyes Open man.. but now they`re closed..



http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=128892
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show....php?p=1405292

So - basically this piece is fictional, yes.. but it just describes me trying to help someone out and teach him things he wouldn`t have ever learned.. but in the end.. he fucks everything up.. and ruins his life.. leave links.. i`ll hit them up.. Pz.

[The Beat Mod]

ya noe wat...this piece, I will give you props for.

Basically...I enjoyed it. I'm usually indimidated by pieces this long...but I read this one fully and I did enjoy it.

Your keepin it real...and that's a good thing to see. Even if the story is fictional, this scene occurs in the world almost everyday...Nobody wants to listen to nobody no more...everybody thinks that they have life figured out...and that nobody else's input matters.

Very well-wriiten...it's obvious that you must have been writing for a long time because the words you use, work well together.

Didn't really grasp the imagination tho...But it wasn't needed for this piece. You don't need much imagination when your trying to get a message across. Enough was there so it doesn't hurt your piece.

Overall...I will label this piece as ill. Anybody can disagree with me if they want, but you know wat...You tackled an issue that occurs in modern day society every day, made it very-well written, and the chorus is something that stands out.

Unique style you got there. Keep doing pieces like this.

Pz. God Bless.

[SMZ]

Neat the style switch - Flow was on point - like T said this was a very "real" story and you made it feel that way - Only thing I can say is there wasn't anything that really stuck in my mind - No real strong lines - just pretty good ones throughout - I know you just flow threw this stuff but you should at least try to put some serious thought into just maybe your opening and closing lines - that way something will stick in peoples minds - cause honestly I got'ta say ten mins from now I'm not gon'na remember any of this - pretty nice drop though man - and just trying to give you some real advice - peace bro

[Genocide21]

i would have to say that this piece was dope...from beginning to end i thought it was good...It had a good FLOW...not really any strong lines...you should try to put more emotion on this...so u can feel it...though this was a tight verse
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=128868

[Stephen Mayfield]

ncie shit

great writign imagery all that, im at aschool or i'd give better feed

i'll nominate this for Open mic though...hot shit...deep ass story.

[Spartacus]

Cool shit CJ Reverse

Your alot better than i gave you credit for before

[Big Kountry]

yeah i like the imaginary


a little of topic twaros the middle but you got it back

ending was fenomal i like that shit man

good piece

[FormulaSquared]

imaginary ? the fuck kid.. haven`t been here in a while.. so up this shit until I put something else up.

[Chris Black]

I could have sworn I'd read this before. Maybe at another site? Anyway, this was a nice piece. Good flow and rhymescheme. Good storytelling in the second verse, aswell. This was pretty nice. Keep droppin' this good shit, homie.

My Open Mic:
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...89#post1471589

Ps. You should go check in at the HF forum more often. You aint been there since we accepted you.

-W1

[Chris Black]

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