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Thread: //<The Value of Abstention>\\

  1. #1
    ...practice makes poetry
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    Lightbulb //<The Value of Abstention>\\

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...=115818&page=1

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...=115771&page=1

    k ima drop now...

    By Magnificent and Lisa Hill

    It is often suggested that abstention is tolerable
    Because it’s expression thus tacit and desirable,
    Registering distaste through this conceived mechanism
    An eloquent expression of contentment with the system,
    Such is counter-factual, speculative and often problematic
    Non-voters are twice as concerned with issues democratic,
    And diplomatic, they’re unsure of social mismanagement
    Now they’re locked in a cycle of alienation and abandonment,
    For democracy this represents a civic deficit statistic
    Strong negative correlations exist as voting characteristics,
    Presidential election campaigns aimed at social isolation,
    Geographically relative lacks of community and education,
    Low levels of efficacy and high levels of marginality
    Immigrants, employment and residential instability,
    But abstainers are facing obstacles to participation
    Emotional, subjective and beyond rational calculation,
    Silence is at best ambiguous, it can mean many things
    It may mean “I am homeless” or “I live like a king”

    This is very high vocab for most… so don’t feel bad if this went way over your head…
    Hence Forward

  2. #2
    ...practice makes poetry
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    cmon this deserves a look... upupup^^
    Hence Forward

  3. #3
    ...practice makes poetry
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    really... no one wants to reply and give me an honest feedback... *tsk*
    Hence Forward

  4. #4
    Newbie Vise Versa's Avatar
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    this was decent for a keystyle.
    it flowed pretty well...it was on point.
    rhyme scheme was ok, kinda basic.
    vocabulary was aight, ya know.
    im sayin it was good, no doubt.
    its just kinda ehh, ya know what im sayin.
    i say the only thing you work on,
    is your originality and creativity.
    other than dat, shit wuz kool.
    props.

    if u can check out my new peice called,

    " The Dream Stalker ", http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=116277

    feedback is appreciated, thanx
    pz.

  5. #5
    ...practice makes poetry
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    thanks... the reality is that this is just me going loco while doing my 10 page poli sci paper on compulsory voting for my university class.... no imagery at all... just facts... like an essay...
    Hence Forward

  6. #6
    Free, As A Bird
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    It felt a little too short for me....

    Although, ther were allot of nice vocab crafted here...But vocab isnt the most important thing....
    You allso had nice Multies...Internals- The usual...

    I coudnt get the real point of it thought....

    Non the less, you dont lack the basic needs......From my point of view, try and relax with your pieces...Dont put complex words there cuz u HAVE TO...Do it as it comes out, Naturaly...
    ArcBiggEZ

    Heavyweight Penis Crew

  7. #7
    ...practice makes poetry
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    i should reiterate.. this was done from a university paper... all of the big words have significant meaning... it's not an easy thing condensing the sum of a paper into 16 lines
    Hence Forward

  8. #8
    ..Truth.. rule's Avatar
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    wasn't a bad piece...try and capture the reader of your first bar..makes for a better read...the flow structure was basic..the story was pretty good for a this concept...imagery was basic..decent drop...keep it up pz
    Soft Focus
    ..Returns..

  9. #9
    ...practice makes poetry
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    I should say this isn't a story or anything like that... it's informational... im tryin to teach yall about why abstaining from voting is a bad thing... i was hoping some of the elevated peeps could really pull that out and wonder if maybe they should vote this spring...
    Hence Forward

  10. #10
    ...practice makes poetry
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    lookin for one more elevated look... no newbs reply only want comments from those who appreciate a quick lesson in voter privilege...
    Hence Forward

  11. #11
    ...practice makes poetry
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    k last up on this...
    Hence Forward

  12. #12
    You've Earned a Custom Title!
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    whats up mag....yeah this was pretty coo....how come you didnt spit like this when we battled?? (a battle no one would vote on of course)..i dont know maybe you felt you didnt have to....but anyway immabreakitdown.......i think my favorite lines were "Silence is at best ambiguous, it can mean many things", and "Low levels of efficacy and high levels of marginality
    Immigrants, employment and residential instability"....kinda makes you think.....but this was kinda short...and im not gonna hate on your vocab or nothing like some other peeps did...you might have been going for a certin style on this piece....the only thing i would say about that is...dont use so many of the "tion" words....those are too easy...but anyway keep spittin...im out

  13. #13
    ...practice makes poetry
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    thanks although i only dropped 4 total words that ended like that... but i think it's deserved... if i was just gonna flow a neat little song... it might be different... use more multiple word rhymes... but this was a educational piece so....
    Hence Forward

  14. #14
    ...practice makes poetry
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    up and up yall
    Hence Forward

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