1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 3

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  1. #1
    Gotta be Tardi Fresh's Avatar
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    1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 3

    1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 3



    ***IMPORTANT UPDATE***

    Some of you lazy bastards need to stop being lazy bastards. We will no longer be accepting shitty ass votes!!! Look below for examples of shitty ass votes that will no longer be counted:

    Quote Originally Posted by Krucial Th1rt3en View Post
    v/og maestro. better bar
    Quote Originally Posted by Basic M View Post
    V/Knowp...harsher
    Quote Originally Posted by Basic M View Post
    ---Thought Crack had the harder bar

    V/C. Morris
    Quote Originally Posted by Heise View Post
    Smog got it, other dudes was trash

    I will not be accepting votes like these anymore. There was some other votes that were shitty too I just posted the worst of the worst. Explain your reason why you voted who you did other than "other dude was trash". Lackluster votes will not count towards final score of the battle and will not count towards the 5 votes you need per week. See below for examples of a good vote:

    Quote Originally Posted by OG Maestro View Post
    13 I like how you took your time with the punch, but you gotta work those lines and double up on your entendres in order for that type of style to hit. i suggest you look at some of Smack's battles, or Joog's swag and flow battles where they both use the short bar style pretty effectively. and remember, there's a difference between an entendre and word association. like all the apostrophes you kept putting around your words were just small time associations, nothing really clever or mind blowing.

    Long story short, you gotta use multiple plays on words and puns for that style to work the best. which is tough to do, i can't see anyone in this league pulling off. maybe you can if you work hard enough.

    Basic, you did your thing. i didn't like the bar but it was executed better than your opponent's so you get my vote off that fact.

    Vote: Basic
    Quote Originally Posted by Smog View Post
    Both of these were weak, I felt basic was lazy n didn't put much thought into executing the concept better, cuz def coulda been fire.. kru dropped a weak scheme with terrible structure.. I mean it coulda been worded better for more impact but with the way it stands I got M edging this..

    Basic
    Quote Originally Posted by Requiem View Post
    Neither really had anything special. Basic, well was pretty basic. I don’t particularly like punches that are aimed at ones team/crew/gang etc because these is supposed to be one on one personal. Yes I get that his name plays into it but just a tired concept.

    Kru 13 had a decent idea, I’ll give him a round for being a little more original but at the end of the day it was far too wordy and not executed very well.

    Tough call here but my vote will bring to Basic M by a thin margin.

    Vote - Basic M
    Intro

    I've updated a couple of the rules, if you want to check them out again. Basically 5 vote requirement (instead of voting on every battle) and contenders and champ are mandatory to vote on. A couple of you were slacking on the voting, so next week I'll be looking over everything and penalizing everyone who didn't meet the minimum voting (including those who leave shitty ass votes).

    Battle Summaries

    Smog vs Requiem

    Quote Originally Posted by Smog View Post
    Fuck ur "I get no respect" rant, just peep the truth n believe me, dummy
    That^ phrase ain't why ur Rodney Dangerfield.. ur him cuz beatin u is Easy, Money
    vs

    Quote Originally Posted by Requiem View Post
    Come on dude ... these personals are glum son, none-em add up ...
    Sad fuck...
    I make millions clown, U makin “Penny - why’s” lookin’ like U suck dick for crack, slut
    Smog took this one comfortably. He had a good personal which connected and got the job done. Requiem had an ok attempt at wordplay but his execution was way off. I woulda gone something like "if for every time he gets a penny, why's this clown still broke" or something like that (coulda mentioned him living in the gutter in the first line to add to the correlation) to be more effective. I can see Requiem getting a lot better by the end of this season though.


    Witty vs KnowP

    Quote Originally Posted by KnowP View Post
    You sneak dissing in the chat like a rat, nothing to get your brim hit
    Keep playing me stupid and one flash will make your lights dimwit
    vs

    Quote Originally Posted by Witty View Post
    I hate this faggot fucker, I'm an avid puncher with a savage hunger
    I'll crack his structure with a jab to every part of his body like acupuncture.
    KnowP had a mehhh nameplay whereas witty had a non connecting similie. By non connecting I mean the punch didn't connect with knowp. The correlations within the bar connected but it wasn't harsh nor was it a proper punch imo.
    KnowP took this one fairly easily.


    Basic M vs Krucial Thirt3en

    Quote Originally Posted by Basic M View Post
    You comment on battles like ur talented...ur trash, its no debatin'
    I'll drive by & let the ratchet hit Kru...but it wont be gang retaliation
    vs

    Quote Originally Posted by Krucial Th1rt3en View Post
    this week i have a new 'Top Job'...
    i gotta 'Bag' for this 'Basic trash',
    shotgun...
    if he act 'shady on my stage',
    ill put more 'holes in M's/Em's face' than 'Slims jason mask'.
    I wasn't impressed with this battle.. I think basic m thought this would be an easy win so he dropped a very sub par "kru" nameplay that had weak correlations and just seemed rushed. His first line talked about his talent and how theres no debating he's trash then his second line goes to shooting guns and a weak flip off of kru. Make sure your entire bar makes sense not just the last line. Krucial dropped a weird punchline that was just wayyyy too wordy and didn't directly attack his opponent. You could have used basic trash and done something like "we know basic trash, s'why I got this battle in the bag" (just a quick format don't judge me) and it would have been better. All that extra "shady on my stage" and "m's / ems face" and "slims jason mask" just took away from the basic trash concept (which was already worded horrible). I know you thought you had some type of thought provoking punchline that had all these angles, but really it was overkill and took away from any potential it might have had..

    boston vs Joe Boston

    nothing

    vs

    Quote Originally Posted by Joe Boston View Post
    Fag wants to be on that romantic shit, prays it gets him in the sheets hes hoping
    Tries to express his love with a Rose now he got eight women accusing him of groping
    "prays it gets him in the sheets hes hoping" is redundant like smog said. Takes away from the impact of the punch by having shit like this. All in all an okay punch, nothing crazy but it was a classic Joe Boston 'take something from the news and turn it into a loosely correlated punchline usually with no personal factor to it'...

    plethora vs Bomb Bard

    Quote Originally Posted by plethora View Post
    ur periodic table punch was missin many elements including zinc & brass
    also Hydrogen Bomb.. and hopefully north korea drops one on ur bitch ass
    vs

    nothing

    plethora had a nice punch this week. Decent namelay with a personal tied in as well. Not much more to say about this battle, plethora wasted a decent punch on a no showing faggot.

    OG Maestro vs Crack Morris

    Quote Originally Posted by Crack Morris View Post
    i'll stun yahh life, got a crew of loyal psychopaths.. do work with a gun or knife
    my team like a cult following... with one nod they stabbing the shit out of this manson an wife
    Quote Originally Posted by OG Maestro View Post
    Listen.

    Knife game on horror movie, so he bleedin to death on the first time like I couldn't spare a virgin
    It's only fair I'm purging, but Morr's stab wound had Twists & Turns that even scared the surgeon
    I dunno who crack morris is but he had a decent punch i thought with a wordplay and current event tied into it. I honestly felt crack morris should have taken the dub here, but voters felt otherwise... so what can you do. Either way it was still close and OG had a decent punch too. One thing I didn't like about either punch is that they were both longgg as fuck lol try and shorten them up. The more you can fit into less, the more it'll have impact.

    Diso vs. Heise

    nothing

    vs

    nothing

    Faggots

    King Los Freestyle

    [youtube]RbimBJJiGUA[/youtube]

    Week 3 Top Punches

    5. KnowP

    Quote Originally Posted by KnowP View Post
    You sneak dissing in the chat like a rat, nothing to get your brim hit
    Keep playing me stupid and one flash will make your lights dimwit
    4. Crack Morris

    Quote Originally Posted by Crack Morris View Post
    i'll stun yahh life, got a crew of loyal psychopaths.. do work with a gun or knife
    my team like a cult following... with one nod they stabbing the shit out of this manson an wife
    3. OG Maestro

    Quote Originally Posted by OG Maestro View Post
    Knife game on horror movie, so he bleedin to death on the first time like I couldn't spare a virgin
    It's only fair I'm purging, but Morr's stab wound had Twists & Turns that even scared the surgeon
    2. plethora

    Quote Originally Posted by plethora View Post
    ur periodic table punch was missin many elements including zinc & brass
    also Hydrogen Bomb.. and hopefully north korea drops one on ur bitch ass
    1. Smog

    Quote Originally Posted by Smog View Post
    Fuck ur "I get no respect" rant, just peep the truth n believe me, dummy
    That^ phrase ain't why ur Rodney Dangerfield.. ur him cuz beatin u is Easy, Money

    Congratulations to @Smog and @plethora for holding down the 2 top punch spots 3 weeks in a row now!

    Babes: Miss [insert country here] Edition

    Miss Canada



    Miss USA



    Miss Puerto Rico



    Miss Mexico



    Miss England



    Week 4 Match Ups / Predictions

    Alphabet vs Smash

    Alphabet is back from his door to door vacuum cleaner selling career that never took off and he's ready to take off some heads I'm sure.. Alphabet has been doing this a long time and has many well known names under is belt. Smash is more of a video battler but he can drop decent from time to time. But I think Alphabet is going to take this one easily as long as he doesn't sleep on him.

    Alphabet: 70 | Smash: 30

    Belooshka vs Krucial Thirt3en

    I dunno what's gonna happen here. Belooshka is a troll and may not even show or he may drop something that's capable of beating Krucial. Krucial had an eye opening battle last week as he now has a better idea of whats hot and whats not when it comes to good punchlines.. I think Krucial has the edge on this one though.

    Krucial Thirt3en: 60 | Belooshka: 40

    Joe Boston vs plethora

    Joe Boston still dropping current event lines almost every time he drops so with that being said along with his inability to utilize his concepts properly, I think it's safe to say plethora will take this one. Unless something unforeseen happens like aids and he loses by DQ, I can't see Joe Boston beating him.

    plethora: 80 | Joe Boston: 20

    Smog vs KnowP

    KnowP is gonna have to drop something proper to get the edge here.. He was long ago much higher tiered than Smog. But Smog has surpassed KnowP by a fair amount and is one of the first names people will think of in this day and age when top RB battlers is brought up. A couple years ago I may have predicted differently, but today its gonna be:

    Smog: 70 | KnowP: 30

    Crack Morris vs Allen Knight

    Crack Morris proved he has the mechanics down of writing a punchline, so lets see how he does. Allen Knight is consistently dropping good punches and has a resume that can prove he has what it takes to beat the best. Crack Morris will have to drop fire if he's thinking of beating AK.

    Allen Knight: 70 | Crack Morris: 30

    Requiem vs OG Maestro

    Requiem is one of those dudes who's trash but thinks he's amazing. OG Maestro is one of those dudes who thinks he's a master sensei and that he's got it all figured out. Both of them have heads too big for their bodies, but one of them has the higher chance of being the victor.

    OG Maestro: 60 | Requiem: 40

    The Villain. vs Viral

    The Villain. aka Dagel is a topical guy so I have no idea what kinda shit he's gonna come up with.. Viral is a nobody, at least that will be the case until his alias is revealed (if he's an alias). I think if Viral actually shows, he will beat Dagel but I don't know if he will show.

    Viral: 60 | The Villain.: 40

    Witty vs Basic M

    Witty has shown that he can come up with nice concepts but has not shown that he can form his punches from his creative concepts properly. Sweet multi's and Good metaphors and similies don't win these types of battles too often. Basic M has proven he can drop heat but has also shown he either doesn't always take pride or he underestimates his opponents. Basic do me a favour, and drop like you were against the best so we can see what you're made of. I got Basic with the edge on this one though.

    Basic M: 60 | Witty: 40

    WEEK 1 WTF'S

    WTF @ Requiem crying because he didn't get a contender spot right away?
    WTF @ Amen mingling with everyone but not actual doing anything productive? Sign up for 1-2 you father fucker!
    WTF @ Joe Boston not liking being in the WTF's?
    WTF @ Joe Boston?
    WTF @ Crack Morris getting robbed?
    WTF @ Amen being afraid of midgets?
    WTF @ Alphabet coming back to RB and battling again?
    WTF @ Miss Canada being the best looking bitch of the bunch?
    WTF @ Miss Puerto Rico being the ugliest bitch of the bunch? @Amen
    WTF @ Me lying about Miss Canada? Miss Mexico might be the baddest bitch...
    WTF @ Witty fucking peoples sisters?
    WTF @ Heise and Diso double no show? Faggots
    WTF @ Amen pretending other people wear tube socks but he actually got caught wearing tube socks????
    WTF?!?!?!


    Outro

    I hope you motherfuckers drop some bars and we weed out these no showing cock handlers. I hope Amen stops talking shit about how he's the best at text but never backs it up. You had one HOF pic battle with salamander, you aren't top tier you old carrot stick looking ass humpty dumpty crome dome head havin ass bitch. Joe Boston if you post a shadow boxing video I will let you have sex with Witty and Requiems sisters at the same time. Glad Allen Knight is back.
    Beooshka > Kill Spree and Amen combined. Fuck you all. Peace
    Last edited by Fresh; November 28th, 2017 at 03:27 PM

  2. #2
    You've Earned a Custom Title!
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    Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 3

    Dope Mag as usual @Fresh did you pick a cypher winner by any chance did i miss that?

    - - - Updated - - -

    Ohhh shit @ Fresh im nice with the hands and how many minutes do u want this shadow boxing video to be lol

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  3. #3
    PULL UP Zunto's Avatar
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    Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 3

    GOod mag fresh

    Weird predictions tho

  4. #4
    Gotta be Tardi Fresh's Avatar
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    Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 3

    Quote Originally Posted by Belooshka View Post
    GOod mag fresh

    Weird predictions tho
    why's that?

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  5. #5
    Obnoxious Amen's Avatar
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    Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 3

    WTF @Amen being half of the WTF's, lolol...

    Fresh a true fan.

  6. #6
    Reload KnowP's Avatar
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    Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 3

    Mag is ������������ AF bro. Great content my man. Mad props. And plethora got robbed for the number spot last week. Smog is gay.

  7. #7
    Gotta be Tardi Fresh's Avatar
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    Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 3

    Quote Originally Posted by KnowP View Post
    Mag is ������������ AF bro. Great content my man. Mad props. And plethora got robbed for the number spot last week. Smog is gay.
    if his wp wasn't a reach maybe he would have got it. As is though he did not get robbed for # 1 spot, facts.

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  8. #8
    You've Earned a Custom Title!
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    Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 3

    Lol fire mag

  9. #9
    COKE Kill Spree's Avatar
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    Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 3

    Nice job fresh I'll help with the cypher winner of you want

  10. #10
    Gotta be Tardi Fresh's Avatar
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    Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 3

    what

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  11. #11
    Obnoxious Amen's Avatar
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    Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 3

    Quote Originally Posted by Fresh
    I hope Amen stops talking shit about how he's the best at text but never backs it up. You had one HOF pic battle with salamander, you aren't top tier you old carrot stick looking ass humpty dumpty crome dome head havin ass bitch. Joe Boston if you post a shadow boxing video I will let you have sex with Witty and Requiems sisters at the same time. Glad Allen Knight is back.
    Beooshka > Kill Spree and Amen combined. Fuck you all. Peace
    @Fresh - you have a lot to say to me, eh? Say it to my face tho, so I can open palm bitch slap you, wigga.


  12. #12
    COKE Kill Spree's Avatar
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    Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 3

    Quote Originally Posted by Amen View Post
    @Fresh - you have a lot to say to me, eh? Say it to my face tho, so I can open palm bitch slap you, wigga.

    I've ko'd fresh 3 times don't worry about it

  13. #13
    The Beast...P4P Krucial Th1rt3en's Avatar
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    Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 3

    Quote Originally Posted by Krucial Th1rt3en View Post
    v/og maestro. better bar


    my bad @Fresh , cant lie
    since i got them disrectful votes my last punch battle i kinda lost my interest here
    but i wont do it again.
    just being honest bro
    Krucial Thirteen

  14. #14
    Gotta be Tardi Fresh's Avatar
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    Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 3

    Quote Originally Posted by Krucial Th1rt3en View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Krucial Th1rt3en View Post
    v/og maestro. better bar


    my bad @Fresh , cant lie
    since i got them disrectful votes my last punch battle i kinda lost my interest here
    but i wont do it again.
    just being honest bro
    Well you won't get better if you don't stick around. Unless you think ur slims Jason mask line is as good as it gets

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by Amen View Post
    @Fresh - you have a lot to say to me, eh? Say it to my face tho, so I can open palm bitch slap you, wigga.

    I will beat the shit out of you and Kill Spree with one slap, fugoot

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  15. #15
    The Beast...P4P Krucial Th1rt3en's Avatar
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    Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 3

    nah that was quick, on the spot lmao. i thought the wordplay was dope though, 'holes in Em's face, jason mask" ah well, fuck that bar lmaoooooooooo
    Krucial Thirteen

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