SS: christopherblack12192007

[Chris Black]

christopherblack12192007

Dear diary,

my heart;


Living from paycheck to paycheck, not knowing who to pay next - boss on my neck , shit job, so I stay stressed. I stay pressed for cash, & want to ball up in my sheets. My grandma called, scared cause I ain’t called her in weeks. I payed for the bus ride in dimes & I’m falling asleep, as I write every bit of my heart on these sheets. It’s getting harder to speak. . . easier to spazz out, or chew up pain killers & drink ‘til I pass out. It’s hard to stay clean when the drug game’s the fast route, but I’m trying to change & help my people. I stopped saying nigga, it’s the way I delt with evil. I want to tell my family: “help, I need you,” but I’m a man now, so I’ll suck it up & suffer before I accept a handout. This life isn’t working, I need a backup plan, now. And it kills me to say depression’s got me, I’m hurt. . . Don’t know whether to kill myself or everybody at work. This can’t be all that I’m worth! I post on a rap board to escape reality. Joke around with kids, who focus on talent, G. It stops me from grabbing the cal to squeeze. In this world I’m God cause I can write well. It’s Heaven but reality is more like hell. My talents means nothing & I fail. College is taking too long to get through, so it’s hard for me to switch moods, ‘cause I look in the mirror & noone’s as talented as this dude. Yet I’m here, too broke to get food. My mom knows her child is stuck. I want to cry when she asks why I don’t smile as much. My entire lifestyle is fucked. My hard work isn’t paying off & fuckers use me. . . . The sleeping pills are starting to work - drugs pumping through me, as I spill my heart in a text battle that means nothing to me. . .

Lost in this world, don’t know what to do
Except use hip-hop to tell the fuckin’ truth

The sleeping pills are starting to work - drugs pumping through me,
as I spill my heart in a text battle that means nothing to me. . .

;my heart.

Dear diary,

christopherblack121907

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...pt-355771.html
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...-355063p2.html

[P. Mortuus]

I hope this isn't fully fact na mean..cause that would be fucked and depression would be getting at you bad.

However, I liked the different style, it seemed you didn't hold back here, or try and make it sound or read good, you just went out on all cylinders. The general theme was relatable, morbid at times but showed the helplessness of the person. Another thing I liked was the presentation of the piece, it was written to be read as an om but presented as a diary entry. Overall, it was good work man, I liked this quite a lot.

[Vincent Maestro]

this was good i loved the theme.....and fuck what Mortuus said.....this is the same lifestyle me and all my firends are trapped in.....working shitty jobs and always being caught between being dealers or blue-collar workers......this wa a real ass Rhyme man felt it on all levels...u ain't the only one going through it.....So please don't give up....cause then all us losers are just losing In Vain nah'mean.....keep ya head up homie...keep being a man...death before dishonor my nigga


10/10

[P. Mortuus]

this was good i loved the theme.....and fuck what Mortuus said.....this is the same lifestyle me and all my firends are trapped in.....working shitty jobs and always being caught between being dealers or blue-collar workers......this wa a real ass Rhyme man felt it on all levels...u ain't the only one going through it.....So please don't give up....cause then all us losers are just losing In Vain nah'mean.....keep ya head up homie...keep being a man...death before dishonor my nigga


10/10

What are you on about, did you even read what I had said..I never saw no negative comments there.

[Chris Black]

It's 100% fact. Thanks for the feed.

[Garth Elgar]

Dude, first of all, I don't know your religious beliefs, but since i am sure this is true, I'll be praying for you man. That's a pretty screwed up situation you're in man. Anyhow, the emotion drove this piece straight to my heart. It was really, REAL. I dig that about a piece sometimes, when it's done right. I think you captures your emotion well like I said and followed that up with solid wording and even better imagery. One of the best pieces I have read since I've been back. Nice to see that man. Really enjoyed this. Hope things smooth out for you bro. Peace and be blessed.

hit this up please Chris Black
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...se-356152.html

[$MONEYMAN$]

wow...that some real ass shit right there, speakin from the heart
i like that...nicely wrote i feel da same way on some parts

[Cosa Nostra]

I aint writing this because i need my "2 links" but yeah that shit was real and i can relate man. This actually inspires me more and makes me wanna write another piece. FAve lines:

christopherblack12192007

Dear diary,

my heart;


Living from paycheck to paycheck, not knowing who to pay next - boss on my neck , shit job, so I stay stressed. I stay pressed for cash, & want to ball up in my sheets.

And it kills me to say depression’s got me, I’m hurt. . . Don’t know whether to kill myself or everybody at work. This can’t be all that I’m worth! I post on a rap board to escape reality. Joke around with kids, who focus on talent, G.

It stops me from grabbing the cal to squeeze. In this world I’m God cause I can write well. It’s Heaven but reality is more like hell.

My talents means nothing & I fail. College is taking too long to get through,

The sleeping pills are starting to work - drugs pumping through me,
as I spill my heart in a text battle that means nothing to me. . .

[Infinite Intelligence]

this was a real nice read, excellent flow. raw in a sense which is actually really dope to me. it seemed like everything you were spittin was truth so i have no reason to doubt you. you have a certain way with words and the way you translated your thoughts into this piece was inspiring. stay up man, really nice read.

[Infinite Intelligence]

damn... my bad for the double post, my computers just fuckin up so please just dont mind these extra posts.

[Orc]

I agree with Mortuus, I respect the fact you went all out and didn't follow a structure that would be usually used. I liked how you set it up like a diary entry. I actually feel for you man, a piece doesn't usually do that to me. Rage ebbed from every line of this drop, but subtle, inner rage. It flowed great, but in all honesty it didn't need to because of how personal it was, emotion was really great, too. I also think this is HOF, but not because of the concept or anything, but because of how it's written & how personal it is. Return the feed, please.

[Johnny 6-feet]

It's sad that you feel this way, but the way you expressed it it was nothing short of poetic man. Despite the structure, which was bad for an average OM but perfect for the mood of the piece, you brought a great flow which never became difficult to follow. The verse was jam packed with dope multis and emotional content which made it a breeze to read. Great topic, great work.

keep posting fella.

[(GoRilla)]

I liked this peice it flowed excellently and it was real. Shit just came together perfectly, good job man



http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...me-356321.html

[Ntalek]

yeah...overall this was dope..and very relateable...you just tackled this piece with emotion..and that really worked well on the reader..I'd agree with Baron on the presentation of the drop..it worked better..and really made it read like a diary entry..as you went on about common life...from shitty jobs...to college life..to the toss up between drugs...and work...this was put together well....good drop...keep writing...

[Born To Kill]

Well...

I hate the structure...one big block-like paragraph...

Made it kind of hard to read.
I mean, I see why you did it...it's a diary entry, so you wrote it like one...but still...cut that out.

But the shit was nice...good desperation displayed.
Real good portrayl of hopelessness.
Good shit...for being so simple in rhyme...not many metaphors, no real wordplay.
And get over yourself with the whiny...
But good shit.

Peace