Rain Song

[Johnny 6-feet]

Thought this up walking through a thunderstorm. The beat i've got in my head is just a stamp-stamp-stamp, no frills, march type shit. I might even produce it and make this an audio. Enjoy



Rain Song

Listen to my words until the pain's gone
Stamp your feet with me and sing my rain song
Listen to my words until the pain's gone
Stamp your feet with me and sing my rain song
And stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp
Stomp stomp stomp stomp
And stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp
Stomp stomp stomp stomp

Welcome listeners to the open ceremony
An influx of wisdom you couldn't tell a phony
No need to telephone me, man, i'm broadcasting
A 3rd lung implanted so now the roars lasting
So gather philosophers and astrophysicists
Those who got the gifts, the perfect lyricists
I know you're sick of hearing shit, broken adjectives
Fractured collectives, wise words rejected
Shake off this rain before it soaks your soul
Washes the fire out and leaves a smoking hole
There is hope i'm told, let's come together
Start this tribal dance up to shun the weather
People its now or never, crack these pavements
With a victory march, in plain amazement
Pledge to stay creative, in touch with your native
And ready for the plot twists this living play gives

Listen to my words until the pain's gone
Stamp your feet with me and sing my rain song
Listen to my words until the pain's gone
Stamp your feet with me and sing my rain song
And stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp
Stomp stomp stomp stomp
And stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp
Stomp stomp stomp stomp

Stomp for the fallen, the broken, neglected
Bystanders where the tech hits, those with a deathwish
The mentally eccentric, madness and genius
The herbal pharmacy's that put the weed in us
Those comsumed by greed and lust, pupils dilated
The forgotten warriors whose raging fire faded
And then retired, lazy, stomp for the preachers
Who stand for righteousness and strive to make it reach us
Stomp for the small minded, liars and hipocrits
Who show us what hell is because they're living it
For the TV stars, watched through a glass prison
Camera flashes in bars of light, never reflect wisdom
Stomp for the dead broke, addicts whose head smokes
Inhaling sulphur powder, clutch throats and get choked
And lastly, listeners, i raise a toast of your health
Put a dent in those floorboards and stomp for yourself

Listen to my words until the pain's gone
Stamp your feet with me and sing my rain song
Listen to my words until the pain's gone
Stamp your feet with me and sing my rain song
And stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp
Stomp stomp stomp stomp
And stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp
Stomp stomp stomp stomp



**Floors breaks**




I thank you.

[Ca$$-LOC]

Stomp for the fallen, the broken, neglected
Bystanders where the tech hits, those with a deathwish
The mentally eccentric, madness and genius
The herbal pharmacy's that put the weed in us
Those comsumed by greed and lust, pupils dilated
The forgotten warriors whose raging fire faded
And then retired, lazy, stomp for the preachers
Who stand for righteousness and strive to make it reach us
Stomp for the small minded, liars and hipocrits
Who show us what hell is because they're living it

Every single one of those lines is fuccin retartedly on point with life
i like this shit alot. keep dropin some shit like this and let me know, and i'd love to hear this on audio.
-Ca$$-LOC-

[Facts Machine]

This piece stands out the most from what i've read from you. I'm a big fan of rain sceneries so this caught my attention. Damn, the flow on this was great, probably will come out real smooth on audio. I especially liked these parts...

Welcome listeners to the open ceremony
An influx of wisdom you couldn't tell a phony
No need to telephone me, man, i'm broadcasting
A 3rd lung implanted so now the roars lasting
So gather philosophers and astrophysicists
Those who got the gifts, the perfect lyricists
I know you're sick of hearing shit, broken adjectives
Fractured collectives, wise words rejected
Shake off this rain before it soaks your soul
Washes the fire out and leaves a smoking hole
There is hope i'm told, let's come together
Start this tribal dance up to shun the weather
People its now or never, crack these pavements
With a victory march, in plain amazement
Pledge to stay creative, in touch with your native
And ready for the plot twists this living play gives

^just real great content and i loved the character's way of speaking.

The mentally eccentric, madness and genius
The herbal pharmacy's that put the weed in us

^dope rhyme, liked the herbal pharmacy shit, altho it isn't completely original.. relating illegal drugs and the pharmacy has been done many times, but u pulled it off.

For the TV stars, watched through a glass prison
Camera flashes in bars of light, never reflect wisdom

^damn, glass prison?.. i wish i thought that, dope shit here... i think it would flow better if instead of TV u said television since it rhymes more, but it's w/e floats your boat.

And lastly, listeners, i raise a toast of your health
Put a dent in those floorboards and stomp for yourself

^cool way to end the verse...


as for your chorus, it's dope, but make sure it comes out catchy in the audio.. to me, a lyrical verse like yours should be attached to a catchy chorus/hook.

overall, dope shit, it's tempting to nominate it, but i just need to think more on it.

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...ts-348144.html
^hit this up, please.

[Johnny 6-feet]

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...ve-346071.html

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...ts-348144.html

[_Lyrics]

nice drop, the multis we're on point and the rhyme scheme was more thought out than other pieces i've read from you, props. the imagery was more felt in the chorus. you just painted quite a scenery and mood just by saying that the rain is falling and stomp stomp. i think that would sound pretty good for a hook in audio. the beggining lines were a good buildup too, with the boasting kind of style that we all are so familiar with. the flow had a good rhythmn to it too, i say you should do this audio..

oh and quotables-
Shake off this rain before it soaks your soul
Washes the fire out and leaves a smoking hole
^insightful
People its now or never, crack these pavements
With a victory march, in plain amazement
Pledge to stay creative, in touch with your native
again^

Stomp for the fallen, the broken, neglected
Bystanders where the tech hits, those with a deathwish
The mentally eccentric, madness and genius
The herbal pharmacy's that put the weed in us
Those comsumed by greed and lust, pupils dilated
The forgotten warriors whose raging fire faded
And then retired, lazy, stomp for the preachers
Who stand for righteousness and strive to make it reach us
Stomp for the small minded, liars and hipocrits
Who show us what hell is because they're living it
For the TV stars, watched through a glass prison
Camera flashes in bars of light, never reflect wisdom
Stomp for the dead broke, addicts whose head smokes
Inhaling sulphur powder, clutch throats and get choked
And lastly, listeners, i raise a toast of your health
Put a dent in those floorboards and stomp for yourself
^^i thought this whole verse was great and wouldnt be much quotable to choose lines from it

[Untold.]

damn! every time i read somethin from u, it's always dope. this was another one to. i loved this. like, i'm no where near native american but i love it that u were goin for the feelin of bein in touch with somethin that u but aren't at the same time. like us bein native is a metaphore of somethin more than just an idian.. but more, or somethin in that sense that u can relate with.. thats the vibe im recievin for.

great flow to this piece. it definately sounds like somethin i could hear over a beat to. i loved the endin lines to the first verse.

People its now or never, crack these pavements
With a victory march, in plain amazement
Pledge to stay creative, in touch with your native
And ready for the plot twists this living play gives

^that shit was real cool. it gives me that upbeat vibe. like, makes me proud of what i really am. the delivery was good, the multi's were there flow'd nicely and ur transitions were sick to. great read, yo.

[Derive]

Great piece.

The imagery is on point, and the chorus would be dope if recorded with the right effects. A lot of wisdom in your words, keep doing what you do.


Feedback appreciated:

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...ed-348276.html

[LedgenZ]

Yeah, Johnny you've been writing some dopeness lately. Every idea you've battled with the pen has been sick. This piece was no exception. It had a very political feel to it. Though a lot of it seemed to be subliminal and or candidly written, it still had that " get up off your ass and do something" sort of vibe to it! I enjoyed it. I especially enjoyed the lyrical voice you wrote in, very poetic is some parts and imposingly aggressive in others. Your flow was consistent throughout as well, as too was your content - it never drifted. All in all this piece was sick!


Favorite lines:

Shake off this rain before it soaks your soul
Washes the fire out and leaves a smoking hole
There is hope i'm told, let's come together
Start this tribal dance up to shun the weather
People its now or never, crack these pavements
With a victory march, in plain amazement
Pledge to stay creative, in touch with your native
And ready for the plot twists this living play gives

^Lots of tongue twisters here, but also a lot of dope and clever wordplay in these lines as well. I just thought that entire section was jammed back with great rhymes and dope substance. Great Job!


Also:

Stomp for the small minded, liars and hipocrits
Who show us what hell is because they're living it
For the TV stars, watched through a glass prison
Camera flashes in bars of light, never reflect wisdom
Stomp for the dead broke, addicts whose head smokes
Inhaling sulphur powder, clutch throats and get choked
And lastly, listeners, i raise a toast of your health
Put a dent in those floorboards and stomp for yourself

^Poetic, proactive, and powerful....3 words that describe this portion perfectly.


Look, dude this piece was sick. Enough said. Keep it up!




pZ