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Thread: Mindset of the Devil

  1. #1
    TNL Clee's Avatar
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    Mindset of the Devil

    Mindset of the Devil


    Meet the Devil…

    A melting pot, of smelting rocks claiming to be cells
    Causing solitude to follow you, walking through Hell
    Driving evil courage, to unleash thriving feeble urges
    Through the surface of his skull, mere death emerges
    Crafting every drop of blood, he needs to be meticulous
    Anger paves through his brain waves the speed is ridiculous
    Follow the hollow sounds, which are found in his heart
    Up the trachea, and under the face, to where it all starts
    His ideas are a threat, for which you can never forget
    His thoughts are backwards, like his messages on cassettes


    Rip apart his brain…
    …what will you find?
    Nothing would change…
    …except your own mind


    Glances of needed chances…to conceal to him the earth
    What is it worth? A ball of violence, love, and birth
    His veins pump acid rain into the plump clouds above
    Each cell membrane grabs and breaks the neck of a dove
    He looks over the seven seas; he sees something that’s right
    A place, where the face of the sun is always hidden by night
    His folding conscious told him, he could hold a heroes head
    The thought rolling in his brain, and look…our saviors dead
    His mind is blank; it’s time for his rank to truly prevail
    “It’s mine to take”, after he decided it, no way he’ll fail


    The mind is particularly set above all the other body parts
    The Devils origins, of his one lethal organ, is simply “art”


    …Don’t let him meet you

  2. #2
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    aight dawg heerz styepz ta be da dopezt.

    first dawg, aint shuld have so meny text multiez, de shuld SPEEk to u, nayhmsayen? aiont no wakK catz don;'t drop not that meny so not the AKCHEWAL MULTYZ.. try to flow dem of yo tung and hope i heer dem may-b... also the vocabulary wuznt gd.. it shld be like

    RETIRNAGLATION GALVANIZE APPROPRIATE REGIMENTS.. instead of
    Hi I am LaSHAWNda..

    so yeh dawg, pluz it aint have 1 compton refrence so u shuld get skillz from not da tupacinator but hustlaboi himzelf.. da NIGGA PAKAVELI!! he tot me all mi shyt... itz dope now... HIT ME ON MYSPZE!
    IJL!!! - SMGTS
    PAKaVELI aka HUSTLABOI89 - GTS PRETENDIN 2 BITE

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    me textin up Marvin dat hoe

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    I KAN SENTER MI WURDAZ HOW U LYKE ME NOW WYTE!

  3. #3
    -Camera Kisses- P. Mortuus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by tupacpimpblood69

    so yeh dawg, pluz it aint have 1 compton refrence so u shuld get skillz from not da tupacinator but hustlaboi himzelf.. da NIGGA PAKAVELI!! he tot me all mi shyt... itz dope now... HIT ME ON MYSPZE!
    Ya thanks for the shout out soultice,

  4. #4
    -Camera Kisses- P. Mortuus's Avatar
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    This was a good read. Enticing but not captivating. I liked the flow though i read it slow so that's why it may have seemed good to me idk. The storyline was good gave an intellectual account of the whole Devil thing. To me this was metaphorically speaking about art and having a dark mindset. This kinda stuff would apply to heavy rock ozzy osbourne type music or Satanic cult stuff. Ayway, technically i thought this was sound and overall it was a good read. However, it's nothing new or awe inspiring it's good but it's been done before...to me this piece was not as good as your last one but still better than many current pieces. Lastly, keep flowing and Stay up^.

    When you can leave some comments, thanks
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=312655
    Kiss me through the camera lens.
    TNL

  5. #5
    TNL Clee's Avatar
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    thanks for feed Pak.

    and I'll deff. try to make a compton refrence in my next piece.

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...=1#post5213838
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=312804

  6. #6
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    I thought this piece was pretty good, towards the beginning it was better that the rest then as I progressed it sounded like something I've read before but still you kept the flow pretty good and wordplay was nice (Vocab too) so good job.

    If you can return the favor...

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=312790
    -Insert Sig-



  7. #7
    TNL Clee's Avatar
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    I'll hit it later thanks for feed.

    upp.

  8. #8
    The Witness. Witty's Avatar
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    Nice shit dude, I was feeling this peice. you really impressed me here, you came better than I have seen you come before, so props. As Pakaveli stated, this wasn't exactly a captivating read...but I did enjoy it, and I look forward to seeing more of your work as time progresses. You had nice imagery in here, and your multies were impressive to, nice job dude. Props.

    Get at my peice, Fly on the wall'

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    24 x OM Hall Of Fame

  9. #9
    TNL Clee's Avatar
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    thanks for feed witness, I'll hit it later.

    bump.

  10. #10
    . . . Tragedian.'s Avatar
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    this was real good...i was feelin the title which made me wanna come in and read this...the way you opened it was ok...but then i started reading i'm like.."cool"and i got real intrested and then i didnt wanna stop reading so you caught my eye for sure...you had some really good flow in every line...strutre was nice and plain of course easy to read...emotion was real good i could feel it in this drop...this was real good keep up and check out the sig iight man..good drop..peace.
    Empire

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