Poem

[Novacain]

Poem

::
If only I could make it to a land of embraced inspiration.
If I had one chance to get there, I'd take it.
I don't want to be fake, I kno it'll happen if its fate.
And even if it doesn't, I'll create what I create.
Day to Day, I'll face it face to face, dreams'll never be taken away.
Poetry isn't who I am but at times it can be.
It flows through me and helps me express things I can't express in life.
Things I cant confess except when they're compressed in a set of lines.
It helps me get points across, helps me cope with loss.
Helps me explore new places, and remembers where I've been.
Places faces in pictures and things that I've seen.
Spoken word helps me escape smoke and work.
I cope with hurt with a pens help.
Ink helps me tell the paper what I've felt.
Most of all, poetry helps me cope with myself.
::

As always, thankful for ALL feedback.

[Novacain]

uppin this...


Anybody?

[Tourniquet]

I'll create what I create.

What a beautiful line.
This piece was simple and elegant. It had a very humble feel about it for me, with some very beautiful thoughts. It did feel a little dis jointed toward the middle, line by line, but you rounded it nicely and ended with the same grace it started with.
Simplistic yet profound. Nice write.

[Novacain]

Thank You

[PuffNGive]

good poem, liked the message in it... good shit, keep it up....

[Novacain]

thanks man

[Novacain]

4 days seems like a lifetime here, but its still quite recent...

Uppin this?

[Chris Black]

I only read this because it shares a name with one of my favorite pieces. I liked this though. It was redundant in some lines, but overal, it was a nice drop.

"It flows through me and helps me express things I can't express in life.
Things I cant confess except when they're compressed in a set of lines."
-Very lyrical. I like this part the most.

Nice job.

-W1

[Da Professor]

Life, It's an Earthquake, makes my body shake,
My mind quake in fear,
The echoes from the within my heart ,
draw ever near,
Things like this make our families corrupted,
Intervals of time, like life interrupted,
Sometimes Life at the beggining leads to a new end,
What you get is not what you intend,
It's a game of chance, it's a game of life,
Start a family, with a few kids and a wife,
Take that away and there's nothing left,
Sometimes the easiest isn't the best,
Play the game until your last breath,
Live your life until your death.

[Novacain]

I think you should post this in your own thread man, wrong place.

Click anywhere in this section that sez new thread

[Da Professor]

I think you should post this in your own thread man, wrong place.

Click anywhere in this section that sez new thread

Sorry Novacain, but just for my info. how is it plz hit me with some feedback man!! PEACE!!

[Novacain]

Post it in its own thread and Ill post sum feed for you.

[Young BoE]

Good job novacain. Good flow going to it. And i agree, the line i will create what i create, is very very good.

[Da Professor]

Post it in its own thread and Ill post sum feed for you.

Look iN OPEN MIC FOR ONE CALLED fEELINGS BY hOt_siZzLe my first 3 rhymes are there novacain tell me about all 3 plz thnx playa!!!

[Dan Dare]

This was okay. Nothing great, pretty simple stuff really. I liked a few lines a lot, but together it really wasn't anything, tremendously special. You could well have some potential though. Stick around and I am sure you will improve no end. Keep at it, and give this a read, if you have the time: http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=165612