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A fearless Warrior
http://re3.mm-a4.yimg.com/image/1138787290
“The Fearless Warrior”
As he faced his death, Heart and mind filled with Stress
No matter is the tactics were less, He knew he had to do his best
Mind captured, he should surrender but he’s not a coward
He was puzzled; not sure so he took some steps backwards
Just as he closed his eyes; “Charge” was yelled frantically
Hearts of a broken soul as he thought;” Bombs could really land on me”
I started shooting a lot, I felt like a destroyer but I wasn’t
The dreadful sight cant be pleasant, Everything came so sudden
Did I Black out? My visions were terrible with beloved anger
My wife: Wow I miss her, I fault fearless, death was not a stranger
The captain never lied, he promised I wouldn’t die
As much as I tried, every warrior who passed I would cry
Half of us are dead the tension causes a decrease in trust
Screaming and dust, this must be a dream cause it’s so envious
“Don’t fall”, my captain yelled again, but as we remained to win
Impossible, our enemy battle jets found a way to come in
So we aimed at the sky in order to stop them, Its now a must!
But what we don’t realize was the ground army was attacking us
“Fall back”, said our captains; They are almost gone: Let em die in peace
I went all out killing all the enemy until there numbers started to decrease
“Now go all out” I yelled we attacked full our fantasy has begun
And 45 minutes later we have finally won
Two piece max on the front page; closing the one with the least responces.
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Dont sleep yal..Come on now
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yeah sup fucka ./ fuck a a war .ha
the overall write was tite aand in a readable form.or how else you spell it).............
had some gppd rhy mes here and there.ehich showed elevation skills..........
emotion seemed to be there and carried well....... multies was decent......
imagery was there.......
/Good/
flow was there.............on point...........
wasnt quite deeo enough in its concept for my liking tho/just me i guess being deeper than thou..formaT WAS TITE.BUT I GUESS A LITTLE BORING..NOT ALTOGETHER.DONT GET ME WRONG I'VE WROTE LIKE THISD ON MANY OCCASSIONS ON MY STAGES OF WROTING .SO IM SAYING THIS SHIT WAS TITE ALL THE SAME.BUT NEEDED SOME MORE Variation and excitement added
check this shit out -
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=315291
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Nice OM drop here....imagery was well displayed as the story kept me reading...hmmm this is the first OM i've read from you so you suprised me because i didnt think it was going to be anything to read....the way you wrote it was very urgent...like when i read it i felt like i was at war with them ya know...that's good stuff....with a few minor workouts this piece could've been better but it was dope none the less...good drop...
if you would plz vote on my crew battle in my sig plz...appreciate it...
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Re: A fearless Warrior