Starve for the Camera, Please. (Feat. Passive)
Bold Italics-Illus'Artis
Regular-Passive
It starts as a whisper in the
back of the mind
gnawing
Photo shot whisper plots
evil hymns were perched for eons
yet putting work in like peons
nerves pinch with patience
a steady ache cramps mind
silence creeps grasping cleverness
stabbing the right side of head
trying to allude as it gets worse
yet feasting, such a beast
it's rage starts.....
Eating away, plaguing the
thoughts slowly until you
do not know what is real
and what isnt, setting in
paranoia
hence mind aching, directions lost
scrambled, hand covers skull
whisper of sadistic winds a tone
of soft words yet the subliminal hurts
subconscious broken conscious hurting
eyes filled with vines of lines
from voices bleeding words
inside a mine. I yell for peace
just added pure anger to fire
where you come from?
It's voice grows louder,
berating you until no more
can be withstood. Hair pulling
hatred and loathing, self seething
anger rips through the flesh
until death is longed for.
Suicide
it calls from the depths of
darkness.
Wicked pits terrible mist
fills the circumference of head
Banging thoughts against walls
frustrated of when words came
forth. Kkiill your s e l f.
end li fe rekindles every time.
Voices stabbed through cortex
from past.
You are called childish by family,
for they do not understand for the
voice isnt always in your head.
That voice is the man who married
you and he keeps his volleys of
putridness falling upon your ears
until the voices in your head are
shouting at one another.
Make them shut up!
Regretful hymen haunts me,
foul and gruesome shall diminish
caste away for if not I'm finished.
An anchor shackled around ankles
leaving spirit down. What can I do?
echoes throughout my ears.
Battering me is a voice of torture
voice of waves beating against a shore
a voice of needles poking
eating my flesh away.
Perhaps the only way to end it all,
is for you to perish into darkness.
Then there will be blessed silence.
I thought he loved you, he married
you after all. Does he know what
love is?
I am nothing
I am feeble.
stupid
freak.
I am unstable, deserving of nothing!
This pain is my punishment for the
troubles I create. I deserve death.
Yes crown myself with bars,
bars of entrapment is the way to
arouse your skin, I'm a masochist.
Incompetent being, I am worthless
widow not worthy of a womb.
Self pity for weak individuals.
Hatred rules inside
clinging from a precipice my life,
voice from a pit yells jump and
watch my body fall as a leaf.
Make them stop please! Years
of voices compiling upon one
another until one day I fear I
just may snap.
The laughter is over
none of
this is funny any more. Please,
just leave me alone. Let me be
me, Im not a fucking light switch!
Vivid images flickering
six sense won't stop.
It just wont stop, long as
an abyss. I yearn pavements harsh
end. Please stoop! my hair
is yanked with anger from skin.
Just stop my heart is pummeled.
Gasping for air sweat drenches feet
I weep, I'm tired, I hate what dwells
inside. Inside of me I hate.
I hate what I am, I hate myself.
I used to love myself, that wasnt too
long ago but the voices are coming
back and are taking over. Too much
pain, too much anger, too much hate.
I am a shadow now
I need out of here
I must be free of these bonds
death is freedom.