Flawwed

Once in a while... i see something that smiles
It`s not rushing to find the way, but running through wild
He`s stuck in denile... of something that`s vile
Disregarding the hardships such a wonderful child
Fuck ups? not in the style, perfect in fact
The words roll off his tounge like the surge from a smack
Superbly he'll rap in fact you've probably heard of this cat
Birthed with a knack for punchlines, punchins, punchouts
9 to 5? he's tryin to keep rhyme alive when he runs out
He smiles and thrives while performin.. while explorin
The form of warrin verbally, with a mind for it
Line hordin fine for it.. tourin silenty
Quiet emcee, outspoken, only tryin to be
The guy who you see.. who rhymes on t.v.
M.t.v. or B.e.t.. so place your bids
For whether or not all the fans`ll hate this kid
Even though he`s made to live, with a sacrid gift
Of flagrent skill and ability to make you sing
Make you cry, make you smile and make you live
Make you see light in the dark, make you hate to die
Makes the lines by which the world loves to hear
Except he`s plauged on stage with a fucked up tear
He struggles to breath as he runs with fear
Puncturing ears with shrill cries of.. "i hate life!"
As yet another great man suffers from stage fright, flawwed.

Links:
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=268983
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=268944

You kind of had a forced rhyme scheme here my friend.The multies were there,but like i said it seemed forced.Also the storyline was basic.it was an easy read,and understandable,but it also matters how you go for the topic.Try to use a different sotryline and also use better rhyming syllables so you can make the multies better.

Over all ok piece,ontopic but basic.

not a bad piece but i like the flow. it was steady the whole time and a complex rhyme scheme to add emphasis. you had an overall good piece man, keep up the good work.

you very nice stuff i like the vocabulary everything was on point 1 up