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A Dead Love
Theism, Interrupted…
Youthful exuberance, an insouciant nuisance
When true sense can only be gained
Through years of pain and tears that stain
Your whole entity, as enemies drain your soul’s energy
Your coexisting synergy with mortal and infinity
A portal to divinity eludes your vicinity
Enemies intercede and force hope’s concession
A breeze in the trees is your soul’s dispossession
It’s a sole indiscretion in a life of misdirection
For a simple misconception, my source of present aggression
When I used to believe in creationism, Adam and Eve
And a world populated by a single man’s seed
And a populace vindicated by one man’s deed
A life of confusion, intrusions and disillusions
Problems begat problems, but I found the solution
I used to be a Christian and I loved the Lord
I used to fear omission and now I just ignore
I used to be in Love with a life of piety
Hated by my friends, and spurned by my society
I was drunk with religion, now I see w/ sobriety
And my joy increases an’ never ceases in propriety
A dedication to abstinence and prayin’ arcaic sayins
So my destination would lack the burning sensations
Many generations of man engaged in the dance
Disbelief in chance assigning reason to circumstance
Many slain in vain under the guise of a Holy lance
Cause many claim the same vision of sand as a Holy Land
One of many inconsistencies from supposed divinity
No less a religion than political machine
Forgiveness for a fee, from petty to the obscene
Indulgence and inquisition, the sordid history written
A sorted misery of ethical prison, mysterious missions
Bleeding statues and other asinine visions...
I used to believe, but I’ve divorced without conviction
Grant a good riddance to my enjoyment’s affliction
I used to be a Christian and I loved the Lord
I used to fear omission and now I just ignore
I used to be in Love with a life of piety
Hated by my friends, and spurned by my society
I was drunk with religion, now I see w/ sobriety
And my joy increases an’ never ceases in propriety
And to the epitome of the idiocy…
That one man, could deliver all to divinity
That one God gave a damn about our infinity
That one mob could shed the blood of a God
It’s a bloody façade…*begins to cry*…the sadness is why I sob…
That so many drift in ignorance, just searching for penance
Not enjoying life without a burden of resentment
Because they feel necessity to grovel for repentance
The sentence in this instance is devastating….
Secular Humanistic Leaders are celebrating…
The edict is instituted by the European Union
Open season on Christians with free guns for the shootin…
Hitler solved the wrong problem with his “final solution”
I used to be a Christian and I loved the Lord
I used to fear omission and now I just ignore
I used to be in Love with a life of piety
Hated by my friends, and spurned by my society
I was drunk with religion, now I see w/ sobriety
And my joy increases an’ never ceases in propriety
In the future as the Bible predicts…
The world will be controlled by secular humanists
And Christians will be relegated to the abyss
Our relationship with God riding on the River Styx
We’re already on path and God is growing in wrath
We’ve regressed since Moses formed a snake w/ a staff
We’re less than a half wit…God is Love…
He shared this love with us and we killed it…
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wow that was amazing i loved everything about it. the first verse wrapped me in. you as you know have an excellent vocabulary but i think the highlight in this piece is the metaphors. this was beyond anything i have read recently. you had a nice meter and nice complexity. this is the best thing i have read from you in a while. the chorus is so simple compared to the rest of the piece but at the same time it struck home more then anything. you can really see the breaking point. those six lines not only held the story together but gave people something that they could relate to. also i like how you approached this topic. i probably would have just talked about my wife dying. nice work all around. if this isnt enough pm me and i will go into more detail.
can you return the favor please.
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=166753
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well you had a good flow and an extensive vocabulary but im not really feellin the whole big word aproach........to many big words make the verse seem boring to me. but that just my oppinion.......stay up though man
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http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=166691
hit thi shit up aight^!^!^!^!^!^!^!^!^!^!^!^^^!!^!^
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parts of this were dope - others decent and up - good ish overall - flow started off just nasty - but dropped off as the piece went along - I saw a couple terms used over and over like "divinity" and it didn't seem to be done on purpose - which since I know you have a good vocabulary that was a drawback - you kept to your topic nicely though - things progressed along your point well - the chorus did do a pretty good job tying things together as djb said - closer was nice like I already told you - good stuff - keep at it - peace
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thanks for the replies...
up...
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okay i fixed my verse remember its high punchline peep it now
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Nice, I Was Grabbed Instantly By The First Paragraph
Had Nice Flow And Your Vocab Was Great, Some Words I Didnt Understand
lol
Nice Peice,Keep It Up
