Revenge Is Bloodshed

It seems ridiculous to those ignorant few who can't grasp the pain that my young heart went through,
To those who've long forgotten, and even then barely knew, the helpless life that I lead, the day I almost lost you,
It sounds hysterical, but only when it falls on deaf ears, those who don't care, and are oblivious to fears,
Who have not yet loved, or been burnt in an anguish of tears when heartache sets in, and death wishes appear,
Words taste almost sour, when you don't want to share with arrogant people who think their stories compare,
Who shead tears for no reason, and rip out their hair, to gain evil attentions that really shouldn't be there.
Its hard to hold back emotion, when your encommpassed by lies, that scald and upset those that are angels in your eyes,
That cause only more crying and contamplating demise, that drive innocent people to commit harmful crimes,
Its so hard to tether yourself on a thread, and hold back from following the violene running wild in your head,
And spitting inside when streaks of anger run red, and remember the lines that the Bible once said.
So hard, yes its very hard indeed, to calm yourself down when your tied to such a short lead,
And the next 'word of wisdom' might provide the incentive you need, to lash out on the bully that worships only greed.
So satisfying, when you see their face smash on the curb and it makes you forget all that name calling you heard,
And you'll hit them again, because its what they deserve, they messed with your head, severed your last nerve,
And it all seems well worth it when police load you into the van, and you stare at the blood now all dried on your hands,
With 25 years ahead of you, living out life on remand, no hope of a future: But at least now your a man.


i replied to Credz latest :) thats worth two links by itself..and I also replied to 'toss a dollar'

Wow, Very well written FanTa...I really liked this piece, I thought the flow to it was pretty nice the way i was reading it everything pretty much fell together on its own, Vocab was very nice and steady through out the piece one of the good qualities of this piece, vocab all over the place lol...Overall i cant really say anything bad about it though i mean it was good from what i read!..Like it a lot.

That was a really good piece man...
Flow: The way I read it, it flowed very smoothly, something hard to pull off with long lines like those..8.5/10
Multis: Excelled so much here, just plain awesome..9.5/10
Vocab: There wasn't anything really crazy I saw, but the piece didn't need it...8/10
Topic: I really liked it, you did it well...8.5/10
Overall: An excellent drop man...keep writing cause you got skills ...9/10

Favorite line
And it all seems well worth it when police load you into the van, and you stare at the blood now all dried on your hands,

hit up mine...
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=144763

Whyte..

Liking the Piece alot moved me a bit the flow was on point and flowed very nicely and didnt have trouble reading also liking the vocab you added to the piece made it a very interesting read keep up the good work

Be Kind Peep Mine

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=144140

thanks guys..:) love y'all...and if i get a spare moment, i'll reply to yours..

Yo Fantazee da is a real gud thred u ever thort of makin t an audio cuz it cud make an iimpact na meen.
Ite da marks
Flow: Ite da flow was tight at least 8.5/10 mayb hgher
Vocab:Rite people mite say ders not a lot of initense vocab but if there wer long complicated words t would ruiin the flow so ill give ya 9/10.
Topic: U kept tha topic movin n dint keep on a beat 4 too long so 8/10

Fantazee da ws gd thred so keep on droppin.

nice drop doggy, i had a beat on an i spit ur drop in my head an it went perfect to the beat, well written
i liked this drop
1