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Thread: keystyled...thanx for feed

  1. #1
    Newbie BIGjoke's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2003
    Location
    U.S.
    Age
    40
    Posts
    42
    Battle Record
    1-4

    keystyled...thanx for feed

    Im feelin' sedated, unrealated to the world as u take it
    Emotionally constipated such that my pupils dialated
    Virtually thaught violated like someones in my head
    tellin me crazy ShIt like Light A fIrE unda the Bed
    Or put ThaT GuN to the Niggas Head that wANNa keep playin
    Stash the body, have a alibi wit my friend on vacation
    but Man im just waitin for the day they push the limit
    its vivid, all the blood on ya walls, i wish you could visit
    the chamber of the joke, the screams of death makes ya choke
    ill drain ya body in my tub, put CD on and Soak.....
    .
    .
    .
    .

    .
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...threadid=93377
    poll battle^
    j/k


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  2. #2
    You've Earned a Custom Title! And Death's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Posts
    995
    Battle Record
    26-2
    This wasn't all that bad for a keystyle.

    Structure was nice

    Flowed well

    Could of up'd your vocabulary

    Maybe slid in some multies

    Good drop...

  3. #3
    Peepers
    Guest
    this was aight, aight.....flow and rhyme scheme was consstent and dope throughout man, a nicely flowing peice. but the content was weak and just jumped around, i couldn't get a singe message at all, that made it a boring read, like theres no reason for me to read it at all.....

    return the favor

    peace

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