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Thread: Rate This Song / First Time Post

  1. #1
    Back By Popular Demand... ELEETE's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Location
    San Jose (Bay Area), California
    Age
    42
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    837
    Battle Record
    1-0

    Rate This Song / First Time Post

    -Ive Lost It-
    -ELEETE-

    yo,
    this song is dedicated
    to a certain individual,
    you know who you are

    weve been together but i never really had a clue/
    guess you know by now, i know the truth about you/
    its true, after all this time, i finally figured it out/
    you wanna go ahead and tell me what this is all about/
    you wanna tell me the reason behind all of your lies/
    you wanna tell me for so long, why you kept him in disguise/
    but fuck it, its just my luck to be in this situation/
    gave you my dedication, to meet your expectaions/
    but now i walk around full of anger and rage/
    cause of you i live a life of eternal torture and pain/
    todays the day im turnin around and walkin away/
    all the feelings i had have burned and faded away/
    guess thats how you feel when you been fucked over an played/
    shit hurts like a muthafucka, wouldnt you say/
    guess you wouldnt know cause you invented the game/
    its over, you win but im no longer going to play/

    ive lost it
    -the one thing i never really had-
    ive lost it
    -the lies that quickly drive me mad-
    ive lost it
    -you never been through what i have-

    ive lost it
    -the one thing i never really had
    ive lost it
    -the lies that quickly drive me mad
    ive lost it
    -you never been through what i have

    was this just one of the things you forgot to mention/
    cause im searching for answers to all these fuckin questions/
    guess you can say im feeling lost and confused/
    never thought someone can make me feel so broken and used/
    but you succeeded where i thought no else could/
    and if you could do it again, i know that you would/
    theres times where i fall asleep and wish that id never wake up/
    god take me while im lying in bed, im fed up/
    with all the bullshit that ive been through in my life/
    like Em, i dont wanna die a normal death, i wanna be killed twice/
    how is it that someone like you, can turn so deceitful/
    thinking to myself, you out of all people?/
    when it comes to us, there will never be a sequel/
    always keep in mind, that love backwards spells evol/ (evil)
    so angry inside im feeling my blood tingle/
    im givin up on bitches, i rather stay single/

    ive lost it
    -the one thing i never really had-
    ive lost it
    -the lies that quickly drive me mad-
    ive lost it
    -you never been through what i have-

    ive lost it
    -the one thing i never really had-
    ive lost it
    -the lies that quickly drive me mad-
    ive lost it
    -you never been through what i have-

    yo i dont like to live life, an live in regret/
    my decisions in life, i will never forget/
    but fuck it, im at the end o' my rope/
    i got nothing to live for, im livin wit no hope/
    im mad enough to kill, theres no more deceiving me/
    careful who you lie to, the devils' unleashed in me/
    this is the end o' my story, this is the end o' my book/
    this is where you fucked up, the precious moments you took/
    but fuck it, all in all this is the end/
    no more of this bullshit, no more pretendin to be friends/
    i will never again bend to attend to your needs/
    i rather stand back, sittin, watching you bleed/
    cry your eyes out bitch, tell me what do you see?/
    a turned demon full of fuckin hatred and greed/
    i was once human, one never again you will see/
    im no longer fallin for the bullshit you been feedin to me/

    ive lost it
    -the one thing i never really had-
    ive lost it
    -the lies that quickly drive me mad-
    ive lost it
    -you never been through what i have-

    ive lost it
    -the one thing i never really had-
    ive lost it
    -the lies that quickly drive me mad-
    ive lost it
    -you never been through what i have-

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  2. #2
    NONCENTZ AKA WORD~PERFECT noncentz's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2003
    Location
    j-ville florida
    Age
    44
    Posts
    5,352
    Battle Record
    7-14
    i liked this alot keep doing your thing twin you only elivate but this is a good drop and i think you will do great things further down
    to love something,is to die for it ,if you do, your a martyr , but these days music is morbid, false carters ..prohet's for prophet no lie, look how our last martyr was crucified. to put it in it symplicity, you aint true...you wouldnt sacrifice a few dollars for authenticity..

  3. #3
    Back By Popular Demand... ELEETE's Avatar
    Join Date
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    Location
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    Battle Record
    1-0

    I appreciate

    I appreciate that WORD.

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  4. #4
    Newbie
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Posts
    39
    Battle Record
    1-3
    to be honest my attention was wandering, but not because ya verse was boring. that verse was dope man, keep it up.
    the chorus was dope as fuck. best one ive seen in a long time.
    first verse was really dope, after that i didnt read becuz im really tired and cant keep my eyes on the page.
    sry, will post more feedback tomorrow when i read it all

    -dope. enhance.
    Upgrade your flow, hoe.

  5. #5
    You've Earned a Custom Title! Manimal!'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Posts
    198
    Battle Record
    1-1
    i felt this, very nicely written, the flow and internals were there and kept concept going nicely, good imagery and emotion displayed, the hook was also a nice touch, the first verse was my fave of the three and you finished it off nicely at the end with the "no longer fallin for the bullshit your feding me" - i felt that. All in all a good piece, you'll make for a nice addition to the site, so welcome and props on this piece!

    Replies To Mine Would Be Appreciated: http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...threadid=77159

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  6. #6
    A-Glock
    Guest
    dats deep my yute

  7. #7
    Newbie
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    Where I Can See You?
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    abc
    Last edited by Crulley; May 3rd, 2011 at 11:40 AM
    BIGG-CEE

    im like fat joe coz im gud wit livin big
    mess wit me and hav 1000 ppl all up in ya crib

    Bigg-Cee + D-Lishuz = The U/T

  8. #8
    You've Earned a Custom Title! west's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Age
    40
    Posts
    1,162
    Battle Record
    9-2
    ^what,Anyway,hook was quality,vocab was descent,wordplay wasn't really required here,expression was there,message was there,flow was there,liked this peice coz we all been there dawg,lol.Keep'm cumin.

    Peace

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  9. #9
    tsheff112
    Guest
    Sick shit, I've heard about this, but never took the time to read it. Good shit with the whole keeping focus through the whole thing issue. That's the shit. Tight hook on this. Keep that shit up, and hit up some of my shit if you can get away from that notepad...

    Laaate.

  10. #10
    Ken Dawg
    Guest
    Everything looks decent..didn't like the content much..but it could be worked on ..peace

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