Alright this is a three way battle...good luck....
Topic: a thought, a vision
due date: saturday
judging ends: monday
When voting, rank the competitors verses. For Example
1st: Competitior A
2nd: Competitor B
3rd: Competitor C
Alright this is a three way battle...good luck....
Topic: a thought, a vision
due date: saturday
judging ends: monday
When voting, rank the competitors verses. For Example
1st: Competitior A
2nd: Competitor B
3rd: Competitor C
softfocus
while you write to rapbattles I perform on stage
How's it feel to lack in comparison?............
cha cha checkin.....this is Deacon aka Mack the Knife hows everyone feeling tonight...(claps)...good, good...who wants to see a fist fight?
-1-
softfocus
while you write to rapbattles I perform on stage
How's it feel to lack in comparison?............
Last edited by Thrust; November 10th, 2003 at 07:41 PM
I dont agree w. the guy im facing choosing the topic, that kinda gives him the advantage but its whatever. .
WORD P e r f e c t !
RESERVOIR GODS
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Didn't choose the topic mayne..i had some people help me with topics....are you alright? pshhhhh
-1-
softfocus
while you write to rapbattles I perform on stage
How's it feel to lack in comparison?............
This is a partially a true dream i had....enjoy
witnessing( ~vision~)
journey with me to a place chained and laced with hatred...
where god and satan can switch places so fast they mix faces...
For a split second and im stuck with seconds become extended..
The rooms illuminated from this new delayed combination...
Now im sitting in the corner with the lights out sippin ice house...
I got the rogue 45, sleeping pills and a knife out...
Im sick of life now..I need the light to find a way out..
Everywhere i look is dark i feel my brain split apart..
Then my mind wanders and drifts to the thoughts of one little kid..
Who was robbed of gods gift to live that im so ready to give...
blood drips from the sky down to the pages im writing on..
I look into the clouds at all the faces of my brothers who are gone...
I continue writing on...ink now smeared with blood and tears..
in a form of a dream my dead brother really appears..
an said "god gave you this gift dont let the devil take it from you".
I felt a crack loud as thunder my soul flinched and pained from it..
But i aint touch the gun yet i see the devils face plummet..
And the rise of Jesus Christ light shined brighter than a sunset..
The battles been won but yeah the war aint done yet...
Cause everyday a war is waged for the soul of the lost prophet...
realize-exceptance (~interpretation and thought of vision~)
A lost soul at the crossroads pain is like picoso's
i had a vision of an apostle who knew all, i forgot though
moving full throttle your role model with a bottle..
takes life straight no chasing, no later, no tomorrow.
See i didnt know apathy could be so patient to capture me..
i could see it coming after me never cared if it captured me.
behind my back they laugh at me point fingures at my master piece.
I look for my reflection i see a stranger staring back at me..
Are things as they have to be or was it contentment catastrophe.
is resentment blasphemy for the role that god cast for me...
Did i let destiny test and then get the best of me.
for twenty something years ive seen my life as an empty street.
Now all the time even im pretending me..
sometimes i pray for the end of me but i fall for no enemy...
-1-
Last edited by deacon; November 7th, 2003 at 05:20 PM
softfocus
while you write to rapbattles I perform on stage
How's it feel to lack in comparison?............
A Thought, A Vision
The Thought: A World Without Problems
The Vision: How I See It Is, The Reality
The Thought
What If. .
I could relieve the World or problems, erase all Thats Wrong
What would our Lives be Like if we could All just a Get Along,
in a Perfect Bliss.. Where A Kiss can Symbol Beautiful Caress
Between two humans of different ethnicity in Mutual Respect.
it'd Neutrealise Arrests, the Crime Scene would Decline, See
the Need for Speed, coke and Weed'd be put Behind Thieves.
all Lying would Cease. . & Honesty's the Policy im Promoting,
to Show 'em Ropes &, its a chance to keep ur Opinions Open,
without conforming to a government, or a Political Campaign
id offer u all a chance to stand up, not Listen from Backstage.
a chance to Voice ur Thoughts, a Choice of sorts, my brother
a chance for the Blacks and Whites to show our True Colour,
in a Bloomed Wonder.. an Eden of Love, Peace & Tranquility
to solve all the problems n shed Blood the Streets Did to Me.
An earth Rid of Thee.. hatred, the Drama n Poverty Stopped
How hard can it be to achieve the one thing everyone wants?
The Vision
see its an Entertaining Thought, that you can Live Respected,
but the whole Image Flips 180 when you Switch Perspectives. .
The fact of the matter is, that no amount of law's enough,
& criminals'll co-exist, long as they can make a quick buck.
yet im Feeling for your Sons. . Searching in Need of Hope,
cuz that same Needle in the haystack,
could be Feeding Them Coke.
What if all of the Hate Risen from Racism, no Longer Existed?
and now each culture combined, to fulfill each Other Wishes?
Brother, listen. . i agree with there is no 'Dominant' Race,
But its the Individuality that makes Us Who We Are today.
and Taking that Away from us, aside from our Colours Tone,
We'd all Look, Act and Think the same.. like Cultured Clones.
So dont let that Take a Hold. . our seperate cultures fine,
just Earths become Glaucoma.com ..a Site for Sore Eyes.
Where the Poor Die, Young and Hungry, its everywhere son,
cause Brenda's Got A Baby. . she cant afford to take care of.
from There On there's the third world, their Starving Away,
Where Food's Scarce. . so all they've to Harvest's the Pain.
the Largest Display of selfeshness? within the Wealthy Seeming,
their all for starting campaigns, but wont help Unhealthy Beings.
& that's Imprisoned my Thought, its why i feel like giving in,
in reality. . the Visions Torn,
Its a wonderful world were living in.
Last edited by Baron Mynd; November 6th, 2003 at 12:41 PM
WORD P e r f e c t !
RESERVOIR GODS
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Shit! My bad...
Didn't realize it was a 3 way dance...
Very sorry!
Last edited by Born To Kill; November 7th, 2003 at 12:33 PM
^^^ you got to wait till all 3 drop their verses!
Jim= the vision
Hakim=the thoughts
Counclor
My visions are beautiful predicaments
The outcomes appear somewhat equivalint
I envision myself applauded by crowds...
My acting career is what's shown to me now
Imaginations cleanse into my grasp...
Everything i dwell on rests on my lap
Pen to paper, I create heart-feal poetry
The ink is my thoughts...the biggest part of me...
Be truthful, Especially to yourselves...
The high standards you can't meet don't help
It'll inflict depression upon your troublesome life
Let it out, Tell me what life is really like...
Back to reality...I only picutre doom
I spend a quanity of my time cryin in my bedroom
Every day enduring the emotional abuse...
Jokes bout my speech inpediment don't run outta use
Tragedy has been waiting extensively
I'm potentially the most lauged at this century
I'm Arabic in an area so damn racist....
The distress occurs each time i meet new faces
How ya handle these problems Jim?
Can you picture the world without em?
Just tell me what you've got in store...
Hakim, when do u think u can't take anymore?
Opportunities are still within reason
The good in the world knows i'm to be believed in
I can take the pressure, In fact man handle it
I make progression on the script w/out stutterin in it
Only if i get my chance...Will i make my stride
Which'll be granted i see, N' conqour the pain inside
Hope? Sure...If i was in the Middle East...
America does nothin but drop shit on me
I've thought about returning back home...
N' on the way i make some poetry n songs
I'm respected there, kids even idol me...
But i remain here...
So the tragedy drastically begins to increase
All i have is all these thoughts i posses...
N' they all contain sadness n lots of dread
I'm not suicidal, But soon enuf to be in a caufin
Students plan to take my life...
n it'll be done wit great caution
Jim i'm glad you thrive for your future...
Keep your head up...there's more 2 come next year
Hakim I suggest you try n do what's needed
Stay cool n' collected whenever racist go ya heated
Take advice from Jim, He's overcome the hatred
And i don't wanna see a t-shirt...wit ya face paintin
Last edited by Thrust; November 7th, 2003 at 04:50 PM
Alright lets get the votes rolling...
-1-
softfocus
while you write to rapbattles I perform on stage
How's it feel to lack in comparison?............
can you choose DIFFERENT colors....
please
I cant read the verse
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are ya sure... cuz deacon read it fine?
if ya can't read please don't vote
but if ya highlighted it...it would appear just fine...
ya know?
votes please
props to each battler
Decon...
the verse was a good read, flow wordplay and all were good BUT something about how you did the topic really really REALLY didnt go with me...while it was an easy read i got bored a few times...its like watching the godfather...its a great movie just not captivating (at least for me)
Baron...
your flow hasnt changed even though the name has...the flip on the topic was nice but didnt hit me all that much...vocab and wordplay were very good
Hi My...
We are all lazy so i dont want to have to highlight the screen to understand what you are saying...with that aside...how you came from 3 different views was well done, could have been much better had they each had a different style (flow, rhyme scheme...)
good verse, topic approach wasnt great but not bad
final vote:
Baron God
Hi My Name Is...
Deacon
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Liked what I saw from everyone...
Thought that Deacon and Baron didn't come too originally.
Can you say, John Lennon's Imagine?
We all have those ponderances.
Hi came up with a very unique and personal way of delivering his interpretation of the topic.
Kudos for originality. Vocab needed picking up.
Flow was off in some places.
Ending was a little WTF? But I liked it nonetheless.
Deacon came with very good flow, sick like...
I was really impressed with it.
I thought Baron used a couple of metas/wordplay that just didn't fit.
Looked more like battle-speak, but it was ok.
I guess for personal preference, I'll go with...
1)Deacon
2)Hi
3)Baron
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