The Fault In Stacking Flat-lines

[Moniker]

Drop seeds on a parched tongue
and see lips part to kiss parchment.
Excitement only grows it's own mold.
I hold seven stolen scrolls bound with
rope and smoke the ancient text
like brimstone.

Heaven is all alone now,
a cold home only known to those
who sold souls for improper profits.
Misfits missed the lost tips;
tripping over old prophets that
listed the cost of their options.

The stars started to construct an arc
based on instructions from the dark arts.
Mark the location to embark.
No remark came when our sparks
separated the sacred incarnated name
of God; charting pentagram hearts.

Futuristic isn't it?
When humanastic fulfillments insist
we're just dust and ashes.
The past is yet to come.
I've spit blood into the sands of time,
breathing whirlwinds from my lungs.

Well, what can we make of mud.
The ocean spoke as I rubbed shells together,
telling me the sea smells like revelation.
Ripe with weeds, cracked rocks
and dead reefs reeking of society.
Feed on your starved sense of passion.

This vast abyss is dense with inaction.
Count the abacus backwards
so square heads won't roll.
We've flattened the earth while Atlas
consoled the whole cosmos
to prepare for global geometrical control.

[Matt Millsaps.]

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=307020
^ get at this for me

Well, what a great storyline. Even though it's a poem you depicted your thoughts very clearly. I have seen only one of your other poems and I also enjoyed it. You have a very nice diction and your wording is absolutely stunning. Vocab was simplistic, but it seemed as if the simplistric vocab was necessary to depict this. Nice piece you have here and I must say that I like the style as well. Most poems on here, people rhyme, which is cool, I do it myself, but this is a nice style. Keep it up man!

[Spoken]

The stars started to construct an arc
based on instructions from the dark arts.
Mark the location to embark.
No remark came when our sparks
separated the sacred incarnated name
of God; charting pentagram hearts.

Futuristic isn't it?
When humanastic fulfillments insist
we're just dust and ashes.
The past is yet to come.
I've spit blood into the sands of time,
breathing whirlwinds from my lungs.

Well, what can we make of mud.
The ocean spoke as I rubbed shells together,
telling me the sea smells like revelation.
Ripe with weeds, cracked rocks
and dead reefs reeking of society.
Feed on your starved sense of passion.

This vast abyss is dense with inaction.
Count the abacus backwards
so square heads won't roll.
We've flattened the earth while Atlas
consoled the whole cosmos
to prepare for global geometrical control.
^^
really got into it here....i loved the storyline and the flow of content and how you spread out the balance of emotion and feel to the story....the wordings and use of vocab expressed in this piece was just fantastic...really unqiue mindless AGAIN!...

RTF on the link in my sig

[Cody Nash]

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=307721
^this is for you ...no body's even peeped it yet ..wtf

ok, so you're like a x10 PSHoF'er, maybe more..and quite frankly, this was not your best material. i really loved how this was written though. Original/Fresh topic, deffinatly never written about before here, very nice choice of words. It even had a bit of a FLOW to it. words collided nicely. storyline was pretty tiight, like i said ..nicely written. i'm sorry to keep this so short, but all i ask for is at least this amount of feed in mine. i've gotta get going, just aknowledging that i read it. good read, thanks.

if you want proper and better feed then pm me. if this is ok then cool.

- Nash

[Prince Escobar]

Wow...im at a loss with this one Mindless, throughout this poem i just felt the power of your words, your choice of vocab was, as it always is, phenomenal and the imagery was great. One thing i noticed is that at times it seems as if you overextend your imagery and lose the reader, however through most of this piece you avoided this flaw, and your play on words was strong. This particular part of your piece is what i found most inspiring, "Well, what can we make of mud.
The ocean spoke as I rubbed shells together,
telling me the sea smells like revelation.
Ripe with weeds, cracked rocks
and dead reefs reeking of society.
Feed on your starved sense of passion."
Wow, let that be a microcosm for the whole piece and you see how good it is, great job man, keep up the good work, because it is being appreciated by your peers. 1luv.