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Thread: All I Want...

  1. December 30th, 2005, 04:57 PM #1
    Mag...
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    All I Want...

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=261059
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=261056
    ____

    all I hear is...
    chatterbox... and then some scattershots
    try to decide if the beat running in my head is phat or not
    or is it... bad enough? ... wonder what the fan'll want
    so i skip ahead.... up in my head
    mouth a line then I mime a rhyme, wonder if it's got some cred
    nod my head... check my pencil's lead
    flesh it to the flow... keep it slow
    and if I start to get outta hand... I know it's gonna show
    smoke some dro... just to keep it pro
    pleasingly... it starts to come increasingly
    cuz until recently I had thought I lost all the beats in me
    and the beast in me... and my decency
    the other half know why i keep my hat low
    but nevermind that though because i'm back to phat flows
    and I know that that shows
    so I keep it real... or real enough
    try to cram in as many things that sound like realer stuff
    steal a puff even though it's feelin rough
    cuz weed is real.... it breeds appeal
    if nothing else afterwards i know i'll need a meal
    a blanket and some time to heal
    that's the first part... smooth as birchbark
    from the first spark I know my mother had a hurt heart
    God... if she only knew that I worked hard...

    all I know is...
    back to back... we try to shatterback
    I line em blind like cataracts to keep the blacker black
    jus record that as a matter of fact
    can you stand it? when I get on tangents?
    or how I try everytime to make it rhyme with another accent?
    know you love it... that's how I planned it
    sho nuff set it up... you can't get enough
    got the crowd wavin random hand signs just to 'get em up!'
    but I wonder... did I set em up?
    sure... possibly... or maybe, was it me?
    am I the only one in the room who really doesn't see?
    because I know I wasn't free...
    didn't write it all true... let it fall through
    hey truth! didn't know you was my girl, still sorry I didn't call you
    it's a shame cuz my number's on the wall too...
    not in digits... scrawled in script
    I keep writing even if I know you'll always call it shit
    stand tall or sit... I'll take all of it
    spit it back out... keep it intact now
    a fractured mind is a stones throw from a glass house
    so I'll smash out every pain if a crash now...
    it's not over... it's never complete
    a never ending endeavor set to the latest beat
    if I face hate... well I guess the hate is me...

    all I want is...
    a same ol, same ol... just a plain ol Jane
    someone beautifully vain who's still got some shame
    not much to lose... everything to gain
    listens to the poems and dances to the heat tracks
    she can gimme the beat back while bumpin that sweet ass
    I wanna repeat that... I wanna repeat that...
    but I gotta keep on moving....
    how can I make a statement if I focus on the groovin?
    just keep on boozin... just keep on proving
    show em stamina... show em solidarity
    even I'm down gotta show em nothing is scaring me
    skills varying and they still can't bury me...
    endlessly spluttering... spitting and stuttering
    then the camera clicks quick until I just can't stop shuddering
    can't stop wondering... what if I did other things?
    would I honor my family... pure fantasy
    but can it be? that maybe I could let em handle me
    naw tragically... that sounds like insanity
    back to beginnings... all of my sinning
    my head flood fills with a storm of chatterscatter singing
    eyes are brimming as step into the 9th inning
    chased by the night... I enter the dawn
    all I hear is... nothing... because the truth is all of it's gone
    that's all I know... and now I know that's all I want...
    Hence Forward
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  2. December 30th, 2005, 05:17 PM #2
    Nostradomus.
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    flesh it to the flow... keep it slow
    and if I start to get outta hand... I know it's gonna show
    smoke some dro... just to keep it pro
    pleasingly... it starts to come increasingly
    cuz until recently I had thought I lost all the beats in me
    and the beast in me... and my decency
    the other half know why i keep my hat low
    but nevermind that though because i'm back to phat flows
    and I know that that shows
    so I keep it real... or real enough
    try to cram in as many things that sound like realer stuff
    steal a puff even though it's feelin rough
    Yo these were the most insane lines i've seen from the first page of OM. the vocabulary was multiplex, the imagery was pictured in my mind so elaborate that i felt like i was watching a movie. i enjoyed the read very well, and u deserve the HoF with this peice. great job.....please leave feed on...http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=260790
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  3. December 30th, 2005, 06:25 PM #3
    Drako MC
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    Nice wordage, I can't believe this is slept on, people give feedback here!

    O, and if you all have time, can you peep one of mine?
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...35#post3730335
    appreciate it.

    Good job at this one...

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  4. December 31st, 2005, 09:52 PM #4
    Mag...
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    word... I'm always slept on... peeps call me MC Mattress
    Hence Forward
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  5. January 3rd, 2006, 09:03 AM #5
    Mag...
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    you've gotta be kidding me... you fuckin punks need to take your A.D.D. pills and check out this shit...
    Hence Forward
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  6. January 3rd, 2006, 12:42 PM #6
    B1ZK3T
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    Mad shit, off the wall. Great vocab, nice flow, strong multies, and a great message...I'd give it a *holds up a 9.5*...Keep it up, STAY UPPIN'...
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  7. January 3rd, 2006, 01:21 PM #7
    Percept
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    awesome wordage and vocabulary.... mutlies were very awesome... cool structure, liked it.... imagery was good as well.... this would be dopeasfuck on an audio... good job mag.. stay up and keep writng

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=261477

    hit it
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  8. January 3rd, 2006, 01:39 PM #8
    B1ZK3T
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    Tellin' peeps ta put shit on audio is usually my bit...Oh well, guess I'll share the honors, lol...I second that, put it on audio!!! lol
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  9. January 3rd, 2006, 02:53 PM #9
    EyeBite
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    this was goopd..interesting topic but still a similar topic i've seen in the past but this is the best take at the topic...it ws a good enjoyable read.....flow was smooth and rhymes were really good..nice and complex...sick multies and complexity was here......overall this was a tight drop..keep it up..peace-
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  10. January 3rd, 2006, 03:12 PM #10
    Bounce
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    Ill shit mag, I see your still poping in on us with that sickness... Now I wish more of the new kids could learn from examle and drop solid like this. Very well done, the assonace was great rapid fire type structure, and yeah would be nice to hear man. Keep droping dope bro... Long time...

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    We can use all the views we can get, please support the Father/Daughter movement in hip hop. Do us a favor and post on your Facebook walls and such. Thank you


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  11. January 3rd, 2006, 04:51 PM #11
    Po'
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    Wow Mag.. This is the first Ive read from you.

    And I have to say I am in aw. I meen, honestly. I say that Bounce had nominated it, so I figuerd I would give it a quik read. It started off that I liked you title, it led on to something I thought would be interesting for a change, I read the first couple lines, and Im thinking, holyfuck, this is phat. So I continued on reading. By the time I was done, I was pissed, because I wanted to read more, LOL. Your imagiry was sweet, not like a storyline of course, but the concept, the way you were talking about this was in a unique way, not alot of poets can do. The flow, and multies were definatly the best part, every other fucking word rhymed with the word before or after, or soon to come, it was just fucking unbelivable. I loved the way you did it. The structure made it look pretty dope too. Not that it matters, but it helped me follow along and what not.

    Overall dude, this peice was fucking exellent. I loved it, this would sound phat on a mic for sure. This was a very enjoyable read, and I will definatly be reading everything of yours in the future, keep it up man, Im looking forward to seeing more of this dropped here. I wish more kids would drop like this in the OM forum. Nice to see something good come around for a change.

    HoF nomination.
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  12. January 3rd, 2006, 04:52 PM #12
    <Supreme>
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    nice drop
    cant believe it got so little feed in over 3 days

    flow ws gd
    structure ws gd
    content - really liked it
    rhymin - like the rest of the piece - gd

    overall a gd drop

    keep @ it

    can u comment on 'Level Up' - in om plz

    peace
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  13. January 4th, 2006, 04:46 PM #13
    Mag...
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    since i saw it HoF nominated i thought i should up it... i give deep appreciation to those who have taken time to read this...

    it is indeed a difficult structure... but if you get it... then it really pays off

    think like this

    short line
    ............long line
    short line

    the short lines are made of two caustic stabs of rhyme... or they are most the time... and the long middle line is usually running multis

    the effect is intended to be the same as one couplet

    for example i could render every 3 lines into 2 bars... keep in mind that the middle line is usually done at rapidfire while the 2 smaller lines have pauses and are intended to allow breaths

    word to everyone... and check out the new joint called Fate and Chaos... it's even better than this...
    Hence Forward
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