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Thread: The Right Way

  1. September 26th, 2005, 05:56 PM #1
    EyeBite
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    The Right Way

    Aint not one think right about smoking drugs
    spinnin rims and actin like wanna be thugs
    The Right Way is to be a rapper truthfully
    not the right thing to do when you bully
    but could be, a tradgety, peeps get mad at me
    cuz i did the wrong thing and i cant turn back
    thats a fact, your rhymes are wack, and i'm black
    still....i can be a bit of Psycopathic rhymer
    kill niggaz in a second on the right timer
    not a good way to live life with a secret
    especially when you seriously can't keep it
    tell in a nano second with no doubt about it
    screamin out of pain but dont shout it
    can;'t get the thought out of my mind
    can you show me the right way home
    thanks, if you can be so very kind.................

    listen to your heart, not sum lady
    are you crazy? to listen to her
    the right way is the way you want
    but if you dont use your heart
    your mind will start to haunt
    make you go ballistic and wack
    talkin smack and walkin black
    but you dont understand.....
    i want respect is all i demand
    dont need jewls only a rubber band
    i'm a smart rapper, not like the other man
    my rhymes are representing the struggle man
    this wrong way is making my mind juggle man
    i need sum help quick, i feel real sick
    like i'm gonna vomet,fuck this place
    just go ahead and bomb it.....


    the right way......listen....
    listen to your heart
    don't change your mind
    listen from the start....
    Last edited by EyeBite; September 26th, 2005 at 05:58 PM
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  2. September 26th, 2005, 05:57 PM #2
    EyeBite
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    http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=235639
    http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=235334
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  3. September 26th, 2005, 05:59 PM #3
    Pharoah.
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    go give feed on what i see in the mirror

    first off the mutlies and the rhyme scheme were sik

    but sometimes the rhymes didnt work out

    this is an original concept too i liked it it wuz ill

    you should have the last 2 bars be a hoook and add a another verse and make it an audio

    8.5/10

    nice piece go give feed on

    "What I See In The Mirror"
    Open Mics


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    Poetry

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    Last Word
    Twizteds Bodyguards


    Quotes HOF


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    Originally Posted by Vamp.
    this is perhaps the gayest thread...ALIVE....
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  4. September 27th, 2005, 05:12 PM #4
    EyeBite
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    uppin this one peeps..................................
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  5. September 27th, 2005, 05:41 PM #5
    ADR
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    multis galour....damn.......and ur scheme was nice as well...some ryhmes didnt really go together or co-inside and u had some nice imagery and deaoth in ur verse as welll nothing to shabby but something that with a lil more work on ur complexity would be dope



    thats whassup fam


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  6. September 27th, 2005, 06:06 PM #6
    "lil Neefy"
     
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    nice ish....

    liked da flow to this
    Roc-A-Fella !
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  7. September 27th, 2005, 07:17 PM #7
    EyeBite
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    aiight, tanks all of youz, uppin this one
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  8. September 28th, 2005, 12:07 PM #8
    The Vortex
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    agh did u make the font bigger? i can read it now...

    first off nice one with format shaping,
    rhymes got a bit too basic and repetitive at times but flowed well all the same..
    i like the ending still that dropped kinder dark n dope...just go ahead and bomb it...(thats what i say)

    works pretty good as poetry hip-hop joint

    stay up


    peep my new joint right here-
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=234988
    .................................................. ......................
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  9. September 28th, 2005, 04:46 PM #9
    mcl
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    i liked this piece
    "cuz i did the wrong thing and i cant turn back
    thats a fact, your rhymes are wack, and i'm black" these to rhymes really stood out as some thing good
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  10. September 28th, 2005, 04:48 PM #10
    mcl
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    oh yea 8/10 for this piece
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  11. September 28th, 2005, 05:14 PM #11
    Nan
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    good piece, but maybe the vocab could use some work, good concept, but felt like it needed some creativity

    good drop though
    .Tell Oomp get the doomp clear the room its now official
    Droppin bombs like a North Korean Nuclear Missile.

    Eastside walk it o-o-out.
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  12. September 28th, 2005, 05:18 PM #12
    EyeBite
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    thanks, i appreciate it, uppin for thr last time
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