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Thread: Rear View Prt. 2

  1. #1
    Apostle OS
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    Rear View Prt. 2

    My earliest memories black, my brother back flat on the ground,
    and I wonder if my mother's always gonna be around,
    what the doctors found now is their best kept secret,
    it paid to break her faith yet she manages to keep it.

    Lost souls left to wonder on the side of the road,
    stolen cell phones, walkin it's a far way from home,
    quittin gettin ripped is a task so I take a hit and pass it,
    take a sip out the glass, hatin time cause no one has it.

    In my eyes they'll see me better when I'm ina casket,
    I'm still a child askin forgiveness for my actions,
    it's a habit to count my blessin like seconds not a fasion,
    my sins are confessions, imperfections have got me stressin.

    Bless my homies soul, Lord I know he's out there some where,
    can't force the want to bond when they wont care, what's fair?
    Second lives, keepin secrets, close my eyes, scared of peekin,
    time to show faith, no room for hope to show late.

    Should I be grateful that my Father's around to break us,
    gotta monster starin in my eyes when I wake up,
    shake the sweat from my chin, my ambitions are gettin thin,
    my night will end in sin if I don't shape up.

    -Chorus-

    Starin at the world through my rear view,
    go on baby scream to God he can hear you,
    can you feel a heart beat fade when it's time to die?
    Gettin high watchin time fly.


    Rear View Prt. 1

    The most wicked things tricklin through my mind, it's drinkin time,
    as the breaker lines whisper to the sirens, I tripped the wire.
    How will the undertaker find us, blinded,
    we used to ride, will losin lives remind us?

    You're quick to speak of your beliefes from what you see,
    but reality was once upon a time ina dream.
    I lost my man *D* to a feind now he's dependent,
    troubles always sneak up from behind you, pay attention.

    Shoulda trained my mind to heed the school hall bells,
    inseatd of gettin high and taggin on abadoned stair-wells,
    and only time can tell if Christian is a name we'll always miss,
    is it worth Mama makin pacts wit the Devil for a kiss?

    Now fellony's a shadow to his name, hallow hollar filled by shame.
    "Tell me what's the bother prayin if all gifts from God are taken?"
    If I'm gone tomorrow will my surrows linger on,
    So much that all your strength is borrowed jus to hear my songs?

    Now Daddy's hittin Mommy.
    I know the Boogie Man don't find me here.
    When I rewind it,
    it can't go passed the closet haven years.
    The brooms behind me,
    a toddler, I'm too scared.
    How did her chest get smaller?
    Can't hide the bruisin wit her hair.

    Quittin gettin ripped is like stoppin breathin.
    I wanna get locked up but for all the right reasons.
    Righteousness and shivaree don't need to have a reason.
    If eyes and ears could talk then maybe y'all would start believin.

  2. #2
    Apostle OS
    Guest
    uppin

  3. #3
    Banned
    Join Date
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    well, this was a pretty good peice homie, rhymes were good, vocab was iight, still work ond at but im not complainin, it was good cuz of the good flow and pretty even lines aka structure, topic was interesitng, nice job homie, elevate on vocab and you 'll be a great rapper, keep droppin

  4. #4
    K.T: The Assassin ~ladie_streetz~'s Avatar
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    Frm Da Nati the 513 area! Sin~city aka Riot City is where i be 513 WalnutHillz D.T.W
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    Awards 75+ Wins
    i loved it... very imaginable n the flow was hot... evrything about it was hot to me nothin bad to say you had it alll son.. loved this drop... jus lik your other one keep it up
    THE FAMILY.

  5. #5
    Apostle OS
    Guest
    word good looks y'all

  6. #6
    Apostle OS
    Guest
    uppin

  7. #7
    You've Earned a Custom Title!
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    This is a very good drop right here. Ima say why....lol...but anyways, this was a very imaginative piece, with one and two combined and that as the story progresses, is the emotion or from what I saw, some sense of fear and paranoia. Also it had a very poetic rhythm to it and I like how you had your structure made for the piece. All in all, very good and hope to read more from you soon.

  8. #8
    Apostle OS
    Guest
    uppin

  9. #9
    You've Earned a Custom Title!
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    I liked this piece i like whats real, heartfelt, and what speaks truth,...

    Lost souls left to wonder on the side of the road,
    stolen cell phones, walkin it's a far way from home,
    quittin gettin ripped is a task so I take a hit and pass it,
    take a sip out the glass, hatin time cause no one has it.
    That was one of my favorite stanzas...
    and from part 1, i liked..

    You're quick to speak of your beliefes from what you see,
    but reality was once upon a time ina dream.
    ...........
    Quittin gettin ripped is like stoppin breathin.
    I wanna get locked up but for all the right reasons.
    Righteousness and shivaree don't need to have a reason.
    If eyes and ears could talk then maybe y'all would start believin.
    thought those were of your better stanzas...
    the rest yet not as good, still displayed the message i think '
    enjoyed it man, nice...keep uppin and elevatin


    Check out my pieve titled INSANITY...its in here By OnUrb..

    Its mad long, ims orry about that, but its worth the read its a Keystyle Story....but a good story,
    peae

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