No Family To Care For.

[Hugh Jazz]

Based on a true story I saw on TLC.



No family to care for...



School's out, the bell rings and kids start to get heading home
So weak and prone, grade sixers get offered ice-cream cones
By a stranger standing alone, avoiding other children's parents
The kids knew better.. They were warned about guys like this
He makes a move, the child shudders and avoids eye contact
Stepping back, the man grabs his hand before he could react
"What's wrong son... Someone bullying you around again?"
To scared to act a plan… he just exclaimed "yeah.. Dad."
*
The man followed him home before he brutally murdered his father
Waited before raping his mother, leaving him mentally slaughtered
"Fuck me harder" is all she muffled on tape with her mouth stuffed
And as if that wasn't enough... He forced the kid to watch snuff
Day after day, he threatened the same stuff, "keep ya mouth shut..
Or you’ll be under your mother’s tombstone, with a changed month”
*
No family of his own, he adopted a slave to raise…his standards
He was a man handler, but in his head he was… Ned Flanders
Slandered by the slip of tongue, kid was handcuffed in a tub
Then the man drew his gun, and filled it with a pool of blood.
Then it was done… he realized a family man’s a man of wealth
Rich himself, he sewed the wound and nursed him back to health
*
Weeks of hell, the kid’s had enough “I’m losing my fucking mind!”
“What…After all I’ve done for you?! You wanna go… that’s fine.”
“Really…? I can leave… no gimmicks or doubts?”
“Yeah but first you gotta let me take the bullet out.”
*
He handcuffs him to the downstairs kitchen table, injects shots and throws
Blood pouring from the nose, there goes another pair of clothes.
He digs the knife into the kid's back and makes the incisions
Cuts rip through due to poor decisions, all because of one ambition
He wanted to have a family of his own, he was too lazy to chase it
Digging the knife into his heart, the last he sees of this family…is the basement.


http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...85#post2504785
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...71#post2505271

[Da Joker]

wow, this JAY guy is pissin me off, the only thing he says is, get links are it will be closed, he doesn't say anything like, this was bad or this was good just get links for it, but he doesn't so fuck that!

This rap was good, i liked the flow and rhymes and the good structure.. good job, man. keep it up.

[Hugh Jazz]

well if you ont get the other link this will be closed

you suck.

[Hugh Jazz]

bump this................

[Hugh Jazz]

eh.....................

[Hugh Jazz]

feeeeeeeeedbackkkkkkkkkkkk

[Lyrical .45]

This was nice.. I enjoyed it, honestly. The vocab was the weakest part. You were able to paint pictures with the words which is the ultimate goal of any topical poem/verse. Great job.

[Hugh Jazz]

thanks for the feedback

[Vertikle]

Good verses man, like the way the structure made the piece flow as I read it.Plus the imagery was ok and vocab was average.........Juss work on getting a little creativity and originality.

[Casi Aquel]

yea i liked this
it kinda reminded me of myself becus it was like what jay z said about rap
i do what i wanna do
i like how ya went off and on beat but never lost the flow

[Hugh Jazz]

bada ba ba ba......im lovin it

[Vicious Breed]

i say it was pretty discriptive show picture well but pretty bad vocab.. if u coudl make the vocab better u would come to a lot better piece..
structure and flow were solid
but enjoyed it good job

[Hugh Jazz]

thanks....................

[I suck @ OM!]

hot shit even though i aint read tha whole thang vato

[Bronx]

good dawg i liked it