LOTR-Return of the King(Mag...)

[Mag...]

2. You are reading your favorite book for the x100th time.. when all of a sudden.. you find yourself sucked into the story.. but not as the hero.. YOU are the villain.. - what do you do?

The pages flipped swiftly through the manuscript
I barely read it, because the memory always sticks
these words and lines many times i've traced design...
even if blind I could recite it straight from my mind
A fellowship of nine in quest so impossible
through mines impassable and odds improbable
All to destroy one thing, one ring, evil's heart
a start i get each time i read the final part
perserverance over dark of will and courage
lurid demon in the soul of man, Sauron couldn't stir it

Suddenly shuddering! the windows a thundering?!
Wondering what's happening..that's setting me stuttering..
I hear muttering, incantation of the most vile variety
prayers of holy piety doesn't save me from the anxiety
Then a FLASH! of brilliance knocks me down to floor
Pulled more and more into a book that's now a door!!

awakening and shaking and for god's sake i'm wet!
Eyes take to the dark as if made to see sillohuette.
Gollum! I gasp... my gnarled hands clutch on my throat
A strangled cry escapes my lips, Oh lord I've lost all hope
then a memory.. as I scamper and grab for nearby jewelry...
A fool to be dazzled by the sparkling clutch of foolery
infectious this ring and it's even singing to my flesh this
ring is bringing me to it, it's so precious... yes my PRECIOUS!
Oh so treacherous I lash out at my desires for power
But the need is so dire I succumb to it's fire and cower
become one with the one to find them and bind them
now I'll destroy them all.. and in this hour I'll Grind THEM!

Another Flash and it's rip back to reality from insanity
Maybe a dream it was overwrought imagination vanity
Whatever... I pick up the book and for my place I look
But, the end had changed, Middle Earth's fate I had shook
I must've mistook cuz I torn apart Tolkein's greatest script
My fated tip unbalanced the scales and now the ring was in evil's grip

[Mag...]

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...16#post1462316

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...14#post1462314

[Tactixx]

Beautiful.....I too am infatuated with those books....read 100x too!!.....I liked the viewpoint of Sauron...one line really stuck out as Im sure anyone else who read the book would see "become one with the one to find them and bind them
now I'll destroy them all.. and in this hour I'll Grind THEM!"

Nice little wordplay on Tolkien's original poem...Nothing really wrong with it...good structure flow and story...Props...another nice piece....Keep at it man....Peace..

P.S....If you like those books....read J.R.R Tolkien's "The Silmarillian"....It's better than the lord of the rings I think....A little tougher of a read...but its ancient middle earth...you find out where Sauron Gandalf and other characters come from...Again...dope piece...

[west]

Pretty dam good idea here,nice imagery and expression,some internals and mulites,solid structure,wordplay was good when used.overall very good peice.

[Mag...]

thanks guys... I actually burned this out in 20-30 minutes...

to meet a deadline... It could have been much better and more epic ...

meh... maybe I'll try something along those lines later...

[Brother Blue Collar]

very nice drop you got here i like how you did from the villian's point of view cuz most people would have done it from the hero's vocab was on par great use of a story felt it all the way thru again nice drop

[Mag...]

thanks... and up

[DALC]

shit was pretty good
I too enjoyed those books

['PercepTion']

^not a proper reply...

Your flow here was pretty impeccable,
some really nice internals, They really
fitted in well with the piece and kept
it fluent and consistent throughout, big
props on that aspect. Imagry was
another major addition that really caught
my eye..you used some nice vocab, some
nice adjectives and really gave a good
insight into the topic, without losing
flow or my interest.

I liekd the topic, don't think it's been
done before, so original which is always
a good thing..lol. As i said your captured
it well and you also gave some nice complex
and depthful rhymes, nothin to simplistic
here...dope.

"I hear muttering, incantation of the most vile variety
prayers of holy piety doesn't save me from the anxiety"

Another Flash and it's rip back to reality from insanity
Maybe a dream it was overwrought imagination vanity"

^^^ two nice bars, but there were alot more!

"4.3/5"...nice piece.

if you could return the favour:
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=132746

[Johnny 6-feet]

excellent, great subject matter and viviid imagery, strong vocab. what can i say? its stuff like this which raises the standards in open mic.

could you do me a favour and reply to one of my pieces? id appricaite it.

[Mag...]

thanks.. i'll get back to you guys with replies when I get a bit more spare time