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Thread: Dear God!?

  1. February 5th, 2004, 06:55 PM #1
    Daz
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    Dear God!?

    Dear God,

    My problems are piling up…i think that you must be missing them…
    Why do my prayers fall on deaf ears? Aren’t you supposed to be listening…
    Or is there some reason you keep forgetting them?..
    And where are all the answers?…don’t you care about me man?..
    How can you save a divided soul if you don’t give a damn?..
    Consider me a fan…yet somehow I go wrong…
    And I read about your love…so I just play along….
    Yet it’s been so long..since you were there for me..
    And I will scream it to the stars..DO YOU CARE FOR ME!?..
    Why aren’t you here for me…when I need you the most…
    Why does this pain boast of successfully maiming my hope?…
    Now I hang on this rope..in my hand it lays..
    Why didn’t you repair all my damaged dismays…
    All my shattered days…and all my stolen loves….
    Why do I have to box Death…with these broken gloves?
    Healed by his blood…that’s exactly what I read..
    Still I cant stop the train of thoughts from crashing on the walls of my head..
    Yes its been said…that all I had to do was ask you…
    But why are MY PROBLEMS ALWAYS SLIPPING PAST YOU!?..
    YES IM GLAD DUDE…YES YOU GAVE ME LIFE…
    YET YOU GIVE ME NO OPTIONS..BUT THE OTHER END OF THIS KNIFE!
    ITS JUST NOT RIGHT…ALL I ASK IS A FRIEND…
    YOUR SUPPOSED TO BE MY SHELTER..FROM MY WORLD CRASHING IN!..
    AND IF SOMEONE LAUGHS AGAIN…ABOUT HOW THOSE CLOTHES ARE NOT MINES..
    I”VE BEEN ON EVERYONE..SEARCHING FOR YOU ON HELP HOTLINES!…
    …WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN!? WHY WERENT YOU NEXT TO ME!?
    WHEN MY FAMILY DIED AND MY GIRLFRIEND LEFT ME?
    …MAYBE IM NEGLECTING..TO MENTION THE FACT I NEEDED YOU!
    FUNNY WHEN I WAS A KID…I USED TO BELIEVE IN YOU!
    YES I PERCEIVE THE TRUTH..OF COURSE I KNOW YOUR THERE..
    BUT MY SHATTERED HEART NEEDS FIXING…OH GOD! DON’T YOU CARE!?
    YOU WONT BE HERE..MISERY BLOCKS THE ESCAPE…
    WILL YOU ANSWER THE DOOR IF I KNOCKED ON YOUR GATE!?
    STILL I RUNFROM FATE..IT WONT GET THE BEST OF ME…
    BUT AREN’T YOU THE MANIPULATOR OF DESTINY!?
    IS IT THAT HECTIC G..THAT YOU KEEP NEGLECTING ME?..
    OR WOULD YOU RATHER LET THESE DEMONS KEEP DISSECTING ME!?..
    ARE YOU WRECKING ME?…BECHUZ I DWELL ON FOLLY..
    …YOUR SUPPOSED TO BE THE LIFE BOAT IN THIS OCEAN OF MELANCHOLLY…
    YES ITS REAL PROBABLY!.. EXPOSE THESE TEARS “SOB”
    SAVE A LOST SOUL..OH PLEASE..DEAR GOD!
    Always Impervious an Axis Power.


    Supermod Me.
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  2. February 5th, 2004, 07:06 PM #2
    set-ignorance
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    Some good stuff yo. Feeling it, it was good man 8/10 enjoyed reading it, no negative stuff. Keep droppin .. Peace
    "Blood 4 Lyf"... "S'happenin mah dawg? .. Got nuttin but love 4 you.."
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  3. February 5th, 2004, 07:20 PM #3
    Penskills
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    This was decent..you had a good flow and content going on...but Daz..I'm only going to say this once..GET RID OF THE FUKIN CAPS!!!!!!!!..other thn that..coo~~~^^
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  4. February 5th, 2004, 07:32 PM #4
    Jacent.
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    wow man..you are gettin better..this was a very touchy subject & it could be whatever you wanted it to be if you put your heart into it..and you obviously did that..the CAPS put a lot of emotion into what you were trying to make a point...the flow was very good...& i think you should do more topics like these...your defintely becoming very good at these touchy topics & i expect a lot more to come in the future...nice work
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  5. February 5th, 2004, 11:29 PM #5
    Xey
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    Damn man, i even started to doubt my Lord and savior, with the emotion you poured into that one. WOW i like it very much.
    "Why does this pain boast of successfully maiming my hope?…
    Now I hang on this rope..in my hand it lays..
    Why didn’t you repair all my damaged dismays…
    All my shattered days…and all my stolen loves….
    Why do I have to box Death…with these broken gloves?" That is some geniius shit right there. Keep it up, and if you're feeling so down about God, i suggest you read the book of Job in the Bible.
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  6. February 6th, 2004, 12:23 AM #6
    MYSTERIOSO
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    that shit was alright........................................... ....................................
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  7. February 6th, 2004, 06:46 AM #7
    Daz
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    umm^^^^..wow.....great feedback...no doubts on God......just expressing more feed
    Always Impervious an Axis Power.


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  8. February 6th, 2004, 08:51 AM #8
    Daz
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    ...........................feed................... ...back...............................
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  9. February 6th, 2004, 10:59 AM #9
    SMZ
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    tight flow, good vocab' - it conveyed your emotions well, one of the better pieces I've seen on here, only thing is to me it seemed some parts were a little too repetitive.

    Overall - 8/10
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  10. February 6th, 2004, 12:34 PM #10
    Daz
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    ................feed...................
    Always Impervious an Axis Power.


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  11. February 6th, 2004, 01:44 PM #11
    Daz
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    ....................uppin.........................
    Always Impervious an Axis Power.


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  12. February 6th, 2004, 02:04 PM #12
    Provoke
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    Yeah what Jacent said..
    A good topic, somewhat old..yet ur approach was fresh.
    In ways..the caps did contribute to the appeal & feel of that particular part.
    Yet...i suggest you dont do it again.
    Use words to point out parts like you did.
    A good piece overall nothin to outstandin but another good piece.
    Elevation beyond time..your goin fast my man.


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  13. February 6th, 2004, 02:05 PM #13
    Daz
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    and you.....idk man i love you kid....lmao...thx ace.....more feed...people
    Always Impervious an Axis Power.


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  14. February 6th, 2004, 10:02 PM #14
    Chris Black
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    This was ill shit. The first 5 or so lines i didnt like. I thought the pice wouldnt be very good, but it got iller and iller as it went. Flow was cool. I think everyone has asked the "why" questions to god somtime in life. I even did a song like this. Its an interesting topic. I thought this was a nice drop. Keep up the good work.

    Please click the link that says euporias kiss, in my sig and drop feed.
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  15. October 13th, 2004, 12:08 AM #15
    Daz
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    uppin oldness
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