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Thread: Cant stop (My first drop here)

  1. #1
    N-I-Z
    Guest

    Cant stop (My first drop here)

    yo they say hoodie-hoo and pass the dutch//
    you dont know me bitch ask ya slut//
    im whats up, Ive been a rap phenom for eons//
    I pee on peons with my lethal lyrical free on//
    I beat on bitches with a flow we could all agree on//
    I ease on, to record labels to re-up my G on//
    hehe, Yeah, I'll do it like this//
    one of the few white kids you like that wont bite this//
    I write this, and after that I mic this//
    collaberate an album thats chocked full of that tight shit//
    drop a couple of tracks with formula in the back//
    then drop of couple of raps to add on to my stack//
    I gotta knack for this black hip hop culture type music//
    I dont care about racist caucassions I happenned to choose this//
    only and influence a pad and pen//
    Do it one day, do it the next, and do it again//
    I do it to death, the hobby of fucked up knave//
    I'll write a rap for the eulogy before they drop my grave//
    So just in case, Ill leave yall with a lesson learned//
    so preparing now for when I make my return//

    there

  2. #2

  3. #3
    You've Earned a Custom Title!
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    Aiight duke. . This Piece Was Ok, I've Seen Better From You. The Flow Was Off In Places, Structure Was Fucked Too, As Some Lines Were Longer Than Others. . That Throws Flow Off If You Don't Word It Right, Which Sometimes You Didn't. Some Nice Lines Thrown In There Tho, However Most Of The Piece Was Filler. . Definately Not Up To Your Standards.

    drop a couple of tracks with formula in the back//
    ^ ^ ^ Dopest Mufuckin Line. . = )

    Nah. .

    I gotta knack for this black hip hop culture type music//
    I dont care about racist caucassions I happenned to choose this//
    ^ ^ ^ Not Too Bad . . Flow Was Perfect For These Two Lines.

    Keep Droppin, You'll Elevate. . Spit Like You Do On AIM And Shit Cuz.

    -Formula.

  4. #4
    Banned Dios de Hip Hop's Avatar
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    you got skill
    If u audio then thats great and this
    would be a great audio spit
    ur rhyme scheme was off tho
    and some lines were predictable
    and some werent
    vocab could be worked on also

  5. #5
    ... Prince Adem's Avatar
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    it was a kinda boring topic, mostly self glorification, and lots of filler like the other guy said... some things didnt make sense like: "mic this" which doesnt really mean anything.. i know what ur getting at, it just sounds kinda dumb... your flow was off at times, but was ok throughout the whole piece... you used some advanced vocab and some multies, so i'll give u some points for that... you'll elevate with time, peace...

    6/10

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