Yo, what’s up guys. And most importantly, fuck you. Week 6 was a solid week with some of the best battles of the year IMO and a decent amount of voting (still need to work on that).
Majority of the battles could have went either way which was not the usual week.
Ion Metatron vs Wordz AhGod.
First off, close battle and the best bar I’ve seen Ion bring so far but because of wordz concept and being more complex he was able to win this one pretty handedly. I personally thought he won but the majority did not agree and that is what a text battle is decided on. Either way, both brought some of their best stuff and wordz came out on top.
Exalted. vs Bag Mandela
In my eyes it was BOTW but it seems by the end of it most didn’t agree. Bag gun bar+take your cougar concept double meaning did not go over well with the majority and ex ended up taking it with a good concept which in my eyes could have had a stronger connection. At the end of the day, Exalted got it with a funny personal and did enough for the win in the peoples eyes.
Slayerr. vs Desmond Hume
Another very fire battle. It’s unfortunate a winner had to be decided here because I genuinely felt slayers punch was better but I had never seen desmonds move the needle concept so for me he did enough. Slayer came personal and with a good punch but it still wasn’t enough vs demonds fresh comment (even though some commented it was played). Very very high quality battle and was by far the best I’ve seen desmond write while on here and close to the same for slayer since I’ve been back. Very well done to both of you.
Zunto vs Blas
Ah yes, the classic beef battle (I don't actually dislike this legend). I brought a fantasy football/league of your own flip bc nobody showed up to his league but most didn’t seem to appreciate the flip and on a concept I’ve never seen myself nevertheless.. perhaps the personal didn’t make it fresh enough for some. Zunto brought a very fire spongebob meta/double meaning and genuinely was one of the bars of the week for me. I believe me having a personal touch might have got me the win and if I dropped anything bad I likely would have lost. Good stuff & Zunto is still that guy.
R A O vs Plethora
Now on paper pleth took this one somewhat easily but IMO it wasn’t his best showing recently, but he has been dropping a lot of fire so every bar can’t be perfect. RAO came with the best bar text wise I’ve seen him write and is clearly elevating, he even had that hilarious line in the $50 cypher “let me put down my MP3 and find out who gave M,VD”. Keep writing and you’ll only continue to improve.
MV vs FaQEyeReddit
MV imo had a very solid bar this week and FaQ would have been hard pressed to bring enough to beat it no matter what, but my homie is relaxing on a beach somewhere right now and doesn’t give a fuck about this text battle shit. In one sense, respectable, but in the other.. PLEASE COME HOME FAQ. Good stuff MV, salute.
Alright, that’s a brief summary of the battles this week now lets list the top 5 punches (by the peoples opinion)
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Exalted.
1-2's your plaything.. freeposts/swaying? crazy to mod Blas for real cuz ya'll boys
The squeaky wheel gets the grease, bag...& you're a few fries short of a happy meal w/ ur toy
Bag Mandela
Your mums hot, I've seen her at Hooters, I'll catch you out together grab the heater n shoot ya,
Get taken apart Ex like dealerships do when I pull up with the Taurus and leave with a Kuga
Blas
I'm beating this clone. such a lonely bitch, nobody showed up & left this geek all alone
& you winning this is pure fantasy, but at least this faggot is finally in a LEAGUE OF HIS OWN
MV
You really had the most boring beef, without a doubt you had that bitch boy beat
If I’m tired so I need a peep I’ll pray and read the battle Eye/lay, me down to sleep
Desmond Hume
Your dopest is actual junk. & Nobody hypes your bars be thankful the rankings are record based....
Cuz the only time you move the fuckin needle is when you need to find a separate vein
Now personally, if I was going off my own opinion Slayer and Zunto both make the top 5.. but MAJORITY RULES and this seemed to be how the bars were appreciated by you legensds. Moving onto this weeks predictions..
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Exalted. vs MV
Alright, no matter what happens it’s going to be a good battle. This is consistency vs out of the box thinking. Simple but good wording and connections vs wordplay and sicko shit. It will only come down to who brings their best & I look forward to reading both. Gonna go MV here even if it’s somewhat of an underdog pick.
Bag Mandela vs Wordz AhGod.
Wordz has only been getting better while apparently to people bag has only got a bit worse. I personally thought his bar was fire this week, but alas, we don’t all share the same opinions. Wordz dropped a good enough bar as well vs ION and was receieved well, but he will have to do a lot to beat bag. I got bag here.
Ion Metatron vs $pitacular
Well, Ion dropped the best bar I’ve ever seen him write last week but to beat spit he’ll have to do that x10. Not sure how rusty spit is but it’s 1 bar and the guys a RB legend so I’m going to have to go with him.
Slayerr. vs R A O
I know I’ve said this a lot in this mag, but it’s true, slayer dropped his best bar of the season last week IMO if not very close and so did RAO. I have slayer taking this just due to RAOs lack of battle experience but I don’t claim him winning would be impossible. I have Slayer here though. Stay tuned.
Plethora vs Zunto
This will be very good. If pleth writes something near his peak ability this is gonna be tough for Zunto but by no means impossible, after reading his excaliber shit in the other thread it’s clear whoever writes their best will win here. Just hoping both show up and it’ll easily have a chance for BOTW. I’m gonna go zunto here to shock the world.
Blas vs Desmond Hume
Well well well, if it isn’t the man who got very upset I PM’d him about a bar he did not understand even on a base line level. Egos can get fragile sometimes and I understand, you got the battle you were looking for so you better make it good, because I don’t plan on losing. Going with myself here pretty easily, but gl.
Alright guys, quick little mag for the culture. All of you are huge faggots but I love you. DROP EARLY AND VOTE THIS WEEK QUICKLY, KEEP IT MOVING.
Also if you haven’t signed into LLL it starts soon so go sign up ASAP it’s gonna be dope big shouts out to top flight moderator of the world zunto. Lets get it.
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Originally Posted by Desmond Hume
