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Thread: Originality

  1. #1
    Guided by Destiny Dreamer22's Avatar
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    Originality

    originality, Is it a random thought or precisely accurate
    it can describe the essence of life, grip it and grapple it
    but can I master it? or Is it too deep for my mind to spare
    I observe it on a daily basis, through these eyes of despair
    ask, why do I care? because it's the missing link to my chain
    its distance is far from reach, like a blister in my brain
    it could keep me sane, stop my troubles now and beyond
    oh how I long for intellect and to be profound in a song
    somehow it's always been gone & it hurts how I made my scriptures
    smearing a frame with blantant words, trying to paint a picture
    sweating my sweatshirt, tossing and turning to be rare and keen
    blinded the components of originality, like a glare on the screen
    realzing now that it doesn't hit you like pow, seeing is believing
    I used to think of thinking, how to think of the 'next best thing'
    unaware I wasn't thinking, I was just seeking glory and fame
    now I realize it's just a shame
    doing all that just to add more to my name

    .
    .
    .
    .
    Last edited by Dreamer22; September 1st, 2007 at 12:36 AM

  2. #2
    Guided by Destiny Dreamer22's Avatar
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    Last edited by Dreamer22; September 1st, 2007 at 12:26 AM

  3. #3
    Banned Ace of Aces's Avatar
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    Re: Originality

    good stuff here homie. cool lines:

    it could keep me sane, stop my troubles now and beyond
    oh how I long for intellect and to be profound in a song

    best part of the piece was that it rolled off my tongue very smoothly. I don't think it hit home though because it was a bit vague here in there. The narrative pieces are hard to do because it progresses your message quickly, I think if you would have slowed it and said more than the verse would have been better. however the content itself was a bit too vague itself, try to narrow that down. overall though, ima say it was a fun read homie. keep searchin for the originality and writin' for the the right reasons.

    hit my piece up if you see it.

    peACE

  4. #4
    Guided by Destiny Dreamer22's Avatar
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    Re: Originality

    upping for more feed

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