She Said,

[SirusX]

edit cuz i re-read my shit-


She said something like this,

"its been a long time X, how yah been?
herd the law been gettin closer, i feel it. my brother is dumb too"

sometimes i think that its all good, and that you'll come thru...
so i keep the lid off the liqour untill im all alone, break of dawn i come 2
no missed calls, but i didnt call you first, and worse
i swear we can talk without words but still make it hurt
cell phone has been charged for days, never left the outlit
dinner reseverations cancled, but i still got the outfit
sweatin over this so call game of love aint doin me justice
accusations lume like ashtray smoke, but i still just 5th
amen. Dont you think it gets deeper every day
when you swimin in a jacuzzi surrounded by white tip'd fins
yola 2 bowl, higher than soaring eagle eyes 2 prey
all day every way. i did it you did it 2
cuz our time limits were in a minute, hours ago
hours did go, shit hit fans clapped loud for someone somewhere
some day, some time, somebody better tell me how 2 get there
love it till love seems sour, love seems like some time lost
found before you misplaced it, so grimiace if you can taste it
All this, when im wasted... over some girl, some dime, some fine beauty queen, some notch, some cutty cuttie, some girl, some boo, somebody you might know 2, some are bitches, some hos, some trick for the doe.


but this was some rhyme done some time for some dime that i let go.

.. two links to have this reopened.

- Atty

[SirusX]

hey, thats feedback4u.

[Tragedian.]

hmm..this was okay. looks rushed to me and didnt look like you put alot into it. alot of spelling and grammar mistakes. along with some lines that we're forced and you came pretty played with the topic. but you did come nice with rhyming ie. flow and wordplay and you knew what you we're doing with your vocab..i guess just work on coming more...lets say fresh with your topics. sorry this is so slept on, thats om these days.

[SirusX]

its slept on mostly cuz i got banned b RXL right after i posted this in a drunken stuper.

its cool, its suposta b full of mistakes cuz its about a girl