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Thread: because im crazy

  1. #1
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    because im crazy

    excuse me miss
    but what has this come to
    your sister told me to fuck off
    but i didnt know that was a fuck me from you too


    dumb bitch



    a man sits alone, feelin nothing
    payed 80 dollars for 3 grams of loving
    he hates it, but still relies on it to get by
    doesnt have to shit to look foward too
    so he gets skeezed and high

    packs a loose cigarette, cant eat but he's hungry
    hold its up to not lose its contents
    sparks it and feels numby
    loves me loves me not
    all that he thinks
    appearing to be mad at her
    but inside he winks
    grabs a drink, its a sweet tea
    he taste none of it
    but it tells him you still payed 2 dollars for me

    opens the door, falls comfortably into his seat
    put the key to ignition, and takes the peddles to his feet
    a right on laird, a left on thomas drive
    its 630 and his drop off time was 5

    the fiends are pissed, and always taking shit
    i weigh him up a half gram less
    because he called my bitch a bitch
    using a ziplock freezer
    to make it look fatter
    why they always question my shit
    i could of been a dick and sold them arm and hammer

    now happy, he began their night
    asked him to blow a line
    so snorted some more white
    a car pulls up, its a scion xb
    a girl steps out
    turns around and smiles at me
    she's short not too short but big with in the eyes
    shes about 5 foot 5 with a nice breast and thighs
    thought it was lie, she had dreds of locks with her hair
    an amazing stare, she walks over here
    i guess to compromise with my fares

    walks so slowly, sways in the street light
    ask me what im gettin into
    where im gonna be tonight
    i tell her to get in, to snort some sin
    she touches her chin, opens the door
    and excitingly falls in
    smells of lavender, not lavender but lavender haze
    flips on the head lights
    and trips with amaze


    hello, my names katie
    its real nice to see you
    my friend told me to come chill
    and that id probably like to meet you

    thinking so much, but nothing to say
    i spark a swisher of kz
    i look towards her
    people call me haze, but my names mat g
    i pass the rilo and precide to my striving
    i can feel my heart in my feet
    and my feet in my driving

    i take a left back on laird
    a right on laurie
    another left on 98
    pulling into my drive way
    with no need to hurry
    i get out, feeling polite
    so i open her door
    she stands up next to me
    trying so hard not to be foward
    just another december night
    she grabs for my hand
    i look her in the eye, shake it
    im not a bitch im a man

    out of her purse she pulls a half gallon of crown
    say here im taking care of you tonight
    im gonna turn that frown upside down
    its weak its corny
    but why not
    i have no where to be
    and she's pretty fucking hot
    30 minutes later my buddies arrive
    she's kinda faded
    sitting in my lap
    starring in my eyes
    i lean foward i kiss her
    she looks suprised
    i lean foward and kiss her again
    and my soul dies
    Open Mic



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    "Steadly Deciding...Thoughts Sowing Deadly weather
    I rip verses apart,Yet my flows pulls them together"

  2. #2
    -Enough Said-
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    Re: because im crazy

    ayo u drop sick in every1 one ur O.Ms bro... good shit.. this peice was deep.. nd was mad realistic ... u had nice flow and creativity... overall good drop.. keep it up
    Y should i fear a man if he bleed like i bleed....

  3. #3
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    Open Mic



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    "Steadly Deciding...Thoughts Sowing Deadly weather
    I rip verses apart,Yet my flows pulls them together"

  4. #4
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    Re: because im crazy

    upp
    Open Mic



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    "Steadly Deciding...Thoughts Sowing Deadly weather
    I rip verses apart,Yet my flows pulls them together"

  5. #5

    Re: because im crazy

    This shit was actually quite entertating, you buse great array of vocabulary. You had a substantial flow to go along with your witty wordplay. Noi punchlines I don't think, well I didn't see any. The topic was really great, propz on that. And yeah, it did had alot of realism to it, i wouldn't be surprised if this really happens. 8.5/10, keep droppin`.

  6. #6
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    Re: because im crazy

    it was just another day
    my shit doesnt change to much
    thanks for the feed
    Open Mic



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    "Steadly Deciding...Thoughts Sowing Deadly weather
    I rip verses apart,Yet my flows pulls them together"

  7. #7
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    Re: because im crazy

    upp
    Open Mic



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    "Steadly Deciding...Thoughts Sowing Deadly weather
    I rip verses apart,Yet my flows pulls them together"

  8. #8
    productions :) Paze's Avatar
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    Re: because im crazy

    This was a lot more down-to-earth than a lot of the scripts on here are so it was quite easy to understand which is good. The quality was dope and I liked the structure you had here, rythm went smoothly.
    Story was interesting, I liked how I could select your feelings from this.
    Last time completed it well. A death is a good way to end a rhyme since dying is the end (in my view )
    Nice piece, keep it up

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  9. #9
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    Re: because im crazy

    upp
    Open Mic



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    "Steadly Deciding...Thoughts Sowing Deadly weather
    I rip verses apart,Yet my flows pulls them together"

  10. #10
    You've Earned a Custom Title! The Vortex's Avatar
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    Re: because im crazy

    yeah this was pretty nice i reckon. quite simplistic but crafted well all the same in its simplicity.and kept me lightly entertaned and reading til the end f'sho. a couple of minor grammar errors here and there but seemed to straighten up as it went along.the flow was mostly fluent so props on that tio,,,,,,,,,,
    yeah all in s'good shit

    check out me and Baron's collab

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=322465
    .................................................. ......................

  11. #11
    The Witness. Witty's Avatar
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    Re: because im crazy

    This was alright, not really anything special, but still a decent read. you told a dope stroy, in a laid back kinda way, without too much big words and shit. You managed to get your message across, and came with a peice that is moderately enjoyable, there were some minor faults in your wording and your flow in places. But all in all this was an alright read. Props.

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...28#post5414528
    ^rtf please
    Last edited by Witty; January 6th, 2007 at 04:26 PM

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    24 x OM Hall Of Fame

  12. #12
    Midwest Patriots Da Patriot's Avatar
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    Re: because im crazy

    it wazent da best i've read
    Mak'in History!!

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