No Life.

[Tragedian.]

I feel bad for this kid He had no life and no food
No job and no school…
So he went on life in being rude.
In love wit dudes…
He met a man he actually like.
Wanted to see him more…
Every day half way around the city he biked.
Just to see this man…
Who he had no idea even knew who this kid was
And you’re here to see me because?
Is what the man asked..
He said “cuz sir I have no education im to stupid for class”
As he bent down to show the man his ass…
The man kicked him outta the house…
Then this young kid noticed his dick is smaller than a mouse..
And he got a computer and thought he was thug..
So he started talking shit….even to his own rug..
As he tugged and pulled…and he couldn’t get it off the floor..
He said “hey maybe myspace can hook me up wit a whore”
Met a young girl named Sabrina who didn’t look at him
So then he started to try being a thug and stop being neglected
He tried saying he loves her…asking her out..And kept getting rejected…
So went on talking shit to every kid he saw.
Then met more pals over msn..and sucked them off threw a straw…
Now he has his own lil fake bang full of lil bitches..
But just one thing…don’t most gangs try to avoid snitches?
It doesn’t matter any more…the beef is on..
And im just so glad that my name was the next to be drawn..
Well this was a good time reading but now im done..
Time to leave this kid behind..like his father shouldve done

fucka hadi lolz fuckin wanksta

[Tragedian.]

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=303832
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=307060

[Tragedian.]

upp...

[Engivale]

This is not that good, to be quite honest, but I can see you trying, here. It just needs some elevation. You need to keep reading and writing, and try to keep away from the very simple rhymeschems, like tug with rug and other such things... You also don't use any internal rhyme schemes to help your rhythm, and the vocabulary is just a few levels down here for me to save the content... You're mostly talking shit to some character I don't know about. But, okay, a lot of people do that when they start rapping, they think that's what it's about.

I see you have a lot of other OM's, maybe this is just kind of a weak one, I'm not sure to your level on one piece, but i didn't like this too much.

[.InSanity.]

Man.. I dunno about the other man ish, kinda homo. You could use more work on your delivery and vovab. Keep wrokin and elevatin

InSan