K and Nahlidge - An Apple Never Falls Too Far From The Tree.
Nahlidge
K
To fear love is to fear life, and those who fear life are already three parts dead.
Bertrand Russell
Brought up on Nintendo and T.V. dinners, cause livin` was tight
Parents workin` different shifts, like passin` ships in the night
Visions of white America dreams, often buried and threw
On a dinner table stacked with bills, cause it barely gets used
Unfairly accused, of bein` the cause of a broken house hold
He hides himself behind a smile, escapin` through that mouse hole
That he often calls home, it`s where he goes to be alone
To get away from the world, a place that he can call his own
Wishin` life was a roll of dice, so he could gamble it right
But drunken fights is the closest he got to family nights
And Sunday dinners, were more like KFC and a movie
Grantin` him a happy home, like he`d seen in the movies
So he`d dream it, but truely, hardships had scarred the kid
But nothin` could be worse, than mom and dad`s arguments
Sometimes he`d ask why they fought, they said he was the reason
And as the hatred grew stronger, he started to believe them
So everyday he took longer, to find his way back home
Wonderin` if they`d even notice if one day he was gone
Most of his days spent in his room, in the dark with a stereo
Blastin`, wishin` lucky charms were more than a box of cereal
Still he grows older, thinkin` that this is what love is
Seen `em punch, kick and yell, but barely knows what a hug is
Every night the fights grew a little worse than the last one
Til` one night sumthin` happened, this fight would be the last one
His dad comes home from the bar, car`s in the driveway smashed up
Yellin` bitch where the fuck are you?, slammed the door wake your ass up
I`m tired of your bullshit, he yells as he aims at her with a full clip
Little does he know, the safety`s off the trigger when he pulls it
Clueless, he drops the gun, unaware of what he`s done
A murderer, but still a father in the eyes of his son
Holdin` his wife, the boy thinks, Mom, it`s the first time I seen `em hug you
Watchin` his dad pick the gun back up as he whispered I love you
Bang
Now he`s growin` up afraid to love, torn, with a part of denial
Becomin` a grown man, still livin` with the heart of a child
More like the heart of his child, hood, and who`s to blame
But his experience as a young boy, and not wantin` the same
Fate as his parents, shallow, but the depth is apparent
A foster child happy on the surface, lackin` the depth of a parent
Stoppin` himself from witnessin` the passion of when toungues touch
20 sumthin` odd years old, only now experiencin` his own young love
My worries in-depth, buried deep within my chest, nested under skin
The cell formed by my rib-cage doesn’t prohibit the happenings within
Visions of sin, I skim through existence, with a resistance to float
Weighted by every worry, my 3rd person and soul harbor my boat
With remote agitation, my devoted patience to ignore my past runs cold
Scolded from coal, why not add to the fire instead of cindering old
My soul is departed, a self labeled retarded corpse with a pulse
Karma will come, like farther like son joining a murderous cult
Further result, I walk bewildered, chilled with a gusted breeze
Each spine freezing current, excites me in resemblance of my mothers scream
Extreme scenes of violence spiral with a persistence so twisted
I ram fingers down my throat being sick, now I must pick my victim
To christen my insanity, single handedly I clutch a braid of her hair
Hugging, juggling the vomit from my mouth, resisting the lords prayer
I share my nightmare of thoughts that ought to send her above
Catching droplets of blood on my tongue, I taste what it is to be loved
Shoving the jaded blade way beyond as I fondle her carcass
With one burst of passion, I fashion a pierce in my skin of darkness
Heartless, but from what I was shown, this is what a heart is
Expressin` my love to her, the only way I know, a torn apart kid
Stop, he never stopped, so why should I? I thought you loved me
Closed my eyes, reminded of my mother, the way that she touched me
With her last breath she cried for help, with a lifeless look on her face
Now I`m a grown man, relivin` the same past that I tried to erase
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