Twisted

[Borzoi]

http://www.rapbattles.com/forums/sho...65#post4946565

http://www.rapbattles.com/forums/sho...d.php?t=306377

my excretions seap thru your cerebrum to secrete the matter for feedin' me
slimey heathens are seeds breathin' within your semen seekin' a platter for teethin' beasts
I find incisions are deep cleavin' the skins for seasons leavin' a scatter of beef in feastin'
mind and visions are weak greedy with sins and dreamin' , needin' a gat on the streets when meetin'
spinal lesions start leakin' litres I'm bleedin' in reason , grief is the fact of leavin' the eatery
violent demons spark heated beatings , feenin' for freedom is belief you can act on deceit defeatin' thee
file in two teams cast metered readings on sealin' beliefs by competin'
bile spewed in streams masked discreetly unsheath revealin' streaks of a genius

[Borzoi]

Uppin'

[ferocity.]

well first of all, this wasnt a bad attempt.

its a good thing your here to elevate and learn. your flow could use some very fine tuning as it seemed reallly extensive at some points.

all of your other aspects were average, but you getter better as time goes by.

overall// a good peice man - keep up the good work.

[Endeva.]

whats with your bars? if i was you id cut the length down, it totally hampers the flow of things although you can still get it, just not as good as it could be... and the whole 'twisted' evil shit is done over and over, come with a more interesting concept next tmie and make it longer so you can really get going into it...

all in all, just keep at it