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Thread: Chasing A Dream

  1. #1
    Beats You.
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Age
    32
    Posts
    324
    Battle Record
    2-5

    Chasing A Dream

    People told me the 1st part was dope 'n the 2nd was shit.
    So here's a new 2nd

    Chasing A Dream

    Criticism is motivation, that's ugly and blurred
    Above me its stirred, showed me everyone must be concerned
    Chasing the dream, but there's a new race everyday
    A new struggle to overcome, as many fading away
    The brightest shine through the hex of underachievement
    Believe it, because I'm stuck there between it
    Can't back down from anybody, cause all I need is this game
    I have it to play, and hopefully it leads me to fame
    I'm blind with no cane, trapped in your forest
    The world's a stage, now its my performance
    Never gonna give up, this dream..I gotta have it
    I need to be clutch, yet I roll in automatics
    To be peakin' is tough, when this your love
    Hope blood, sweat, 'n tears, build the vision above
    Though doubted, I've mounted, never be givin' it up
    I pray that skills, will help me slip off the cut


    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=305209
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=305121

  2. #2
    You've Earned a Custom Title!
    Join Date
    Nov 2014
    Posts
    2,903
    I like this shit alot. It was real, you know? Speaking technically, I have nothing to complain about.. I'm lovin' the voice your writing takes. It reads like a person talking. Wow.. Good shit man, very good shit. I kind of suck at feedback when I have nothing to bitch about, so.. Yeah. I'll be keeping my eye out for more of your shit.

    Hit mine up?

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=305393

  3. #3
    Beats You.
    Join Date
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    I'm glad you have nothing to bitch about. 25 views and 1 reply, come on gimme some feed

  4. #4
    Banned Vylint's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2004
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    35
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    'Chasing the dream, but there's a new race everyday
    A new struggle to overcome, as many fading away'

    sick


    Very nice flow, a decent wording throughout the whole peice. You did pretty good with this if theres a first part i missed i'd like to see it. Your multis really matched up a bunch and that helped so much. Good shit my dude 7.5/10


    return the favor on On Top Of The World

  5. #5
    Beats You.
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
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    32
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    Battle Record
    2-5
    Thanks man, I'll hit yours up tomorrow

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  6. #6
    . . . Tragedian.'s Avatar
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    Awards 75+ Wins
    real nice not many flaws...decent flow with it only falling once an awhile..
    Chasing the dream, but there's a new race everyday
    A new struggle to overcome, as many fading away
    really liked those lines.keep up man i could use some feed on my oms if u have enough time
    Empire

  7. #7
    Beats You.
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Age
    32
    Posts
    324
    Battle Record
    2-5
    Some more feedback would be nice

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