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Thread: Blue Wolf

  1. #1
    a shoulder for my demon bobericc_lyrics's Avatar
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    Blue Wolf

    7/16-17 11:30p.m.-12:45a.m.
    a heart is where the sorce is in, giving up isnt forfitin',
    the sun isnt distorded when, a full moons orbitin'
    pardoned sir, he stepped out of the restaurant a martyr
    sparklin in the moonlight within his four fathers fur
    clammed, his stance grew, the adrenalin glands too
    ran to his mans crew, & gallopped as he scanned thru
    a snout emerged as someones shout he heard
    a little birdie of his own let him in on that lousy bird
    about 12 midnight, mehh it isnt late,
    he'll catch that snitch, the bitch is fake
    the claws ripped from fingernails to eviscerate
    his krypton was silver bling, walking like wolverine
    he grasped a handful of shadow to pull a skeme
    ghastly laughs elapse in the alley way, & sadly fade
    serving commotion over death, & quicc to retalliate

    hes the blue wolf...
    the daytime promises stacc's of cash
    then moonlight... the blue wolf
    looking out for his pacc
    ...the blue wolf...

    7/17 1:30a.m.-5:35a.m.
    he looked thru a window, ruby is there with a passenger
    had no fur, and the wooden door creaked over lavender
    in a basement, since he cut thru the red lobby
    ruby & lead hobbies, he seen 2 dead bodies
    hearin ruby skills bitchin, he got his fill in the kitchen
    caught his boy in the hall, "how u like killin & snitchin?"
    ruby's boy almost let out a scream, in a rabid style
    silently grasped his vitals, with a passive smile
    blood exhillaration, he made sure the ants got crumbs
    --picked up what he was holding--
    ...now a werewolf w/ a shotgun...
    in a door cracc, the skin shows, thru a grey vein,
    the sins flow,
    he found ruby, and blasted his ass out the window
    threw him his boys head, ruby's quicc to pass a limb
    scabbed a scrimp, leaped out the window after him
    not to late to warn, but the hate will mourn,
    he played on a ruby organ til the brake of dawn

    hes the blue wolf...
    the daytime promises stacc's of cash
    then moonlight... the blue wolf
    looking out for his pacc
    ...the blue wolf...

    7/16 2:00p.m.-2:45p.m.
    making a reservation, to take his beauty to eat
    if it was anywhere else he knew she would leave
    brought her home, known to rearrange if it clutters
    a knock on the door--he became to stutter
    a life lost w/out a paddle, his nieghbor on sed plateu
    red chain, red eyes, red kicks, red neck, red afro
    "frozen pipes? im the plumber..." wait...its the summer
    hes already inside "the names ruby bitch, now slumber"
    knob nulled, pistol pulled, mist erupted from steel
    made a blast so loud jisted the thundered appeal
    penetration, "concider it your medication"
    ripped up his wife as she cried, in his dieing eyes
    ruby had her raped, he wont forget this lieing guy
    before ruby blasted, a wisp escaped her lips
    save me
    the red man walked upstairs and stabbed his baby
    a whole family gone, not blue yet, no use
    ruby turned the T.V. onto the news...
    he laughs and says "i know your other scouts"
    a screen says a flame obliterated his mothers house
    ruby lights a cig walking out the door... "fuck.."
    and while the door closes, in comes a mutt
    "please...the phone" and extends to stand
    ---the dog then bites his hand---

    hes the blue wolf...
    the daytime promises stacc's of cash
    then moonlight... the blue wolf
    looking out for his pacc
    ...the blue wolf...
    'Chaeta

  2. #2
    a shoulder for my demon bobericc_lyrics's Avatar
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    'Chaeta

  3. #3
    The Witness. Witty's Avatar
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    I really liked this peice dude,it was a very interesting and enjoyable read. Your storyline was great I loved the plot of thios peice and the imagery made it a hell of a lot more enjoyable to read. You can really tell a very good story, and I can't wait to see another drop from you, I really got in to this peice and I didn't want it to end, and that is one hell of a compliment because most of the time I can't get in to Oms as well as I did with this one. I really liked this, keep dropping dope shit like this and no doubt you will elevate a shit load my dude. You have just shown me that you are not just a battker, you have other hidden qualities too lol good shit dude, keep at it.

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    24 x OM Hall Of Fame

  4. #4
    -Camera Kisses- P. Mortuus's Avatar
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    Awards Legendary Member PC HOF OM HOF PS Season champ SS HW Champion 25+ Wins
    Like said ebaove, this was a very enjoyable read not what i expected from a battler. Your storytelling covered some technical potholes well and the rhymes you used were at time exclusive therefore i don't believe i have to tell you to use original ideas. I liked the flow it had a rap flow with a story which was impressive. Imagery was really good too. I reckon that if you build on this you will reach knew heights as at times i had no idea with which word the line would end.
    .
    .
    Keep at it, and if you can leave some commetns on my new piece:
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=301685
    Kiss me through the camera lens.
    TNL

  5. #5
    You've Earned a Custom Title! Black Hornet's Avatar
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    this had such a grimey feel to it. your rhymes are off the hook and you got some kinda crazy flow. i thought this was an overall good piece. it would sound deadly as an audio.
    keep up the good work man.

  6. #6
    The Witness. Witty's Avatar
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    24 x OM Hall Of Fame

  7. #7
    this piece had some nice imagry the most that i followed. i like the time line thing in this it caught my eyez real well. the flow was craccin the spot(hot). okay vocabulary, but u use it very well through ya lines.. fams keep writing...

  8. #8
    a shoulder for my demon bobericc_lyrics's Avatar
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    thnx, uppin the deally
    'Chaeta

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