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Thread: I Pledge Allegiance

  1. #1
    Mister. Andrew..'s Avatar
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    I Pledge Allegiance

    I Pledge Allegiance

    I Pledge Allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the Republic for which it stands,
    one Nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all….


    No offense. But who are you pledging your allegiance to sir
    U.S. the Worlds Lord, but why do these things occur
    Prevention on Immigration won’t let people get a viability
    Gas prices coasting only enough for the nobility
    One Nation under God when things look amiss
    But when everything is going right to us God
    ….Doesn’t Exist
    We the people live in a very abyssal of confidence and pride
    Because us winning a war is more important
    …..then the people that died
    The People? We are Like a food aisle in a grocery store
    All used for different things but just feed the
    ……Government money that they say was for the Poor
    We reveal stupidity by not taking in new accounts of ideas
    Instead of helping out around the world
    we sit, watch the basketball bounce or the baseball fly
    .…and drink beer
    Can’t even ask the questions of who do we fear
    Because to us America has no challenging Peers
    Now its all Clear..
    So Who do I pledge to? I am pledging to myself
    Because the only person that can keep me indivisible is myself
    Back.

  2. #2
    Mister. Andrew..'s Avatar
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    Last edited by Andrew..; July 15th, 2006 at 12:38 PM
    Back.

  3. #3
    100 Up Cred's Avatar
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    Nice piece here I have to say in my perspective. Nice topic to choose from. & I liked the way you used present day history to write this piece. I really can relate where you were coming from with this piece. That's why it was well understood to me. The set up was nice also & had a nice flow to it also. Good use of vocab also I have to say. I thought this was a really nice piece that everyone can relate too. That's what made it a very intriguing piece to me.

    Feedback appreciated:
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=301447

    -Infamouz.

  4. #4
    Talent. Omega.'s Avatar
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    this shit was crazy nice flow my dude.....real koo complexity and nice unique wrtie here man i was grabbed from the open to finish man....ill crazy ish like some nas shit...lol i like the vocab and how it was formed nto like a freestyle flow type of ish like kanye aswell...lol

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=299799
    ^^RTF on this link please!
    Last edited by Omega.; July 15th, 2006 at 01:40 PM
    Insane Joker Lyricists


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  5. #5
    Mister. Andrew..'s Avatar
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    Thanks to both. Yea Omega leave a link and Infamouz ill hit up your piece before the end of the day.
    Back.

  6. #6
    Written Voices Jon's Avatar
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    Nice read..

    I liked how you ended it. Your kept the flow amazing through out the piece. Liked the structure a little better this time. But maybe to get your pieces noticed. You should take your time, make every thing about your piece great, the the highest extent. You dropped this quickly. Like now, I'm working on a piece that will take me probably a week until I drop it. I'm going to make sure no flaws, Nothings wrong with it. I might drop it early if I have time, but you can always spend extra time on your piece, make it for you..

    Nice job, keep writing.
    Artificial.Intelligence

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  7. #7
    Mister. Andrew..'s Avatar
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    Thanks & Don't sleep.
    Back.

  8. #8
    Mister. Andrew..'s Avatar
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    Why Sleep on this? :-\
    Back.

  9. #9
    Mister. Andrew..'s Avatar
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    Re: I Pledge Allegiance

    Ahem.
    Back.

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