Cold, and chilling, forever willing to spend the day with her
Far from home, the parts unknown to visit whats a blur
Tormenting memories, of obscenities of life together
Spared by the wicked affair, of her being gone forever
I cry through the lonely nights, absent from her side
I die slowly inside, venturing away from her guide
Deep thoughts of her been, being gone, never seeing
Her face as I wake, ready to take, her values and agreeing
Because without her, I’m wrecked with infinite sorrow
It doesn’t concur, for others I’m sure, I won’t live tomorrow
Walking amazed, through lives maze, sadness with bore
You can’t love living, if you have no love to live for
As the wind chills, and the reaper kills, I carry emotions
I try to fabricate, the feeling of hate, as a missed notion
I fall to the ground; this is her day, the grass I pound
Her voice is the sound, which I rewound so I rebound
The essence of her tone, and her divine movements
Considering her rhythm made natural improvements
Without her I’m confused, without circadian patterns
The tree that held me up died, destruction of Saturn
Suicide attempts I tried and a miss determination amiss
What is this? The threshold of my depression fit
Grievings’ seven year teasing, for god it’s pleasing
The seizing, of what was appeasing, was freezing
My reality as it was known, when she was found prone
Stitching couldn’t solve this injury, it wasn’t sewn
My mind had skipped
I cried in the dark
…drowned the picture
my body had flipped
I had just embarked
…my mind stricture
Staring into her stone eyes, vengeance on my mind
Not forgetting our earthly tie, spiritual was hard to find
War on my mind to be raw, with teachings of evil
Satanic thoughts of what I’ve fought, seem feeble
Enraged with rage, my lethal gaze, hand raised
In the fading haze, my eyes ablaze, a new phase
Turning to Machiavelli on important strategies
Thoughts of death, my conscious is mad at me
This is a remembrance period, I’m not serious
My image is imperious, my mind is delirious
I’ll return in a year, each year it seems colder
On the occasion that she becomes a year older
Another year, and all that I feel is so very alone
Another year, I celebrate her birthday with a tombstone