Hey there!

It looks like you're enjoying Rap Battles Forum but haven't created an account yet. Why not take a minute to register for your own free account now? As a member you get free access to all of our forums and posts plus the ability to post your own messages, communicate directly with other members and much more. Register now!

Already a member? Login at the top of this page to stop seeing this message.

User Tag List

Page 1 of 2 1 2 LastLast
Showing results 1 to 15 of 17

Thread: Open Eyes

  1. #1
    Class of 06 Quest.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    NC
    Age
    37
    Posts
    10,839
    Battle Record
    84-13
    Awards FL Champion 50+ Wins

    Open Eyes

    Open Eyes


    if u only knew about the struggle,holdin on to life....strong
    i'm prayin to jesus,higher power took nails through the palm
    tears flow down my face as rememberance,the heavenly praise
    jacobs ladder i climb,to add days
    yes i've committed sin's,but i admit it was worth it
    the life i lead,i want better before my funeral service
    please touch me lord,i'm ya child awaitin for forgiveness
    if i was eye to eye,i'd bow to u, cause of ya holy greatness
    no man is perfect,but yet can stop what he's doin
    i'm takin baby steps to life,jesus is leadin me through it
    no pain can match the pain,he went through
    he even took rusty material and a staff in the side for me and u
    u got people doubtin his existence?,how could u listen
    thats disrespect,know we are all god children
    he knew his fate,but he didn't care
    so why everytime one of our own turn,we gotta bring it to death?


    open ya eyes to the life,what do u see?
    is it what u thought it would be?
    this ain't
    what it's
    made to be likeee


    Many struggles happened,over the past years
    from 9/11 to Coretta Scott King, theres been many tears
    New Orleans tryna bounce back from Katrina
    Osama still on the run,and soldiers is steady gettin weaker
    But still we help other countries,that tryna to ruin us
    we got poor peeps in our states,But Bush don't look through to us
    children dyin,many born left to die without parents
    As long as u Rich,can afford ya own,u livin by the standards?
    moral of the United States drops when something bad happens
    we don't got a strong leader,he slow like his daddy
    still dealin wit racist shit,the power to over come will neva happen
    Malcolm x and Martins Powerful words,we preach to keep from collapsin
    in the eyes of my life,i'ma black man aka treat to the country
    seekin for some hope,so i mark lyrics down so u can read my....
    thoughts,and whats goin down through my mind
    touch ya hearts wit meaning,and deep thought in my lines

    open ya eyes to the life,what do u see?
    is it what u thought it would be?
    this ain't
    what it's
    made to be likeee

    open ya eyes to the life,what do u see?
    is it what u thought it would be?
    this ain't
    what it's
    made to be likeee
    Last edited by Quest.; March 7th, 2006 at 10:31 PM

  2. #2
    Class of 06 Quest.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    NC
    Age
    37
    Posts
    10,839
    Battle Record
    84-13
    Awards FL Champion 50+ Wins
    Last edited by Quest.; March 8th, 2006 at 08:11 PM

  3. #3
    Class of 06 Quest.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    NC
    Age
    37
    Posts
    10,839
    Battle Record
    84-13
    Awards FL Champion 50+ Wins
    up for feed

  4. #4
    ..in chains? Naw!
    Join Date
    Feb 2002
    Location
    M24
    Age
    39
    Posts
    3,685
    Battle Record
    5-2
    Awards SS Season Champion
    Your second link doesn't work and your other, you just give shitty feedback. Change it and read the rules on fedback, or I'll have to close this
    ArtificialIntelligence
    Sacred Scriptures Champ: 2006.....Brixton

  5. #5
    Class of 06 Quest.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    NC
    Age
    37
    Posts
    10,839
    Battle Record
    84-13
    Awards FL Champion 50+ Wins
    Quote Originally Posted by D.H.Brixton
    Your second link doesn't work and your other, you just give shitty feedback. Change it and read the rules on fedback, or I'll have to close this
    yea i just dropped some more feed on some OM's check and see if that is straight

  6. #6
    Banned White Dice's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Columbus Ohio
    Age
    34
    Posts
    2,932
    Battle Record
    38-16
    hey Johnny will u please vote on ma battle??? the link is: http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...2&page=1&pp=15

  7. #7
    Class of 06 Quest.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    NC
    Age
    37
    Posts
    10,839
    Battle Record
    84-13
    Awards FL Champion 50+ Wins
    Quote Originally Posted by White Dice
    hey Johnny will u please vote on ma battle??? the link is: http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...2&page=1&pp=15
    hell no....rise for feedback

  8. #8
    You've Earned a Custom Title! MCtrini's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Age
    42
    Posts
    156
    Battle Record
    2-6
    Nice consistency. You stated on the topic of dealing with a lot of issues and you
    stuck to it. I also like how you mentioned a lot of current events and issues in there as well. You begain with a religious outlook and then took a more objective stance. I don't know the reason for this thematic change but it worked and I give u my props.

  9. #9
    Class of 06 Quest.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    NC
    Age
    37
    Posts
    10,839
    Battle Record
    84-13
    Awards FL Champion 50+ Wins
    Quote Originally Posted by MCtrini
    Nice consistency. You stated on the topic of dealing with a lot of issues and you
    stuck to it. I also like how you mentioned a lot of current events and issues in there as well. You begain with a religious outlook and then took a more objective stance. I don't know the reason for this thematic change but it worked and I give u my props.
    thanx rise for more feed

  10. #10
    ***Lady_Latin***
    Guest
    i liked dis piece...ur switch of stance (like he^^^said) was wat kept me interested in reading it...it showed u could b stayin on topic & switchin up ur perspective wit out sacrificin da piece
    it flo'd 2getha nicely & altho da vocab wasn't complex, thru use of current-events i think u held dis 2getha!
    keep droppin these kindsa pieces...it was a diff read from others in here
    -LL

  11. #11
    . Illus''s Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Location
    Brooklyn
    Age
    46
    Posts
    8,361
    Battle Record
    8-7
    An ok piece here..
    however your first paragraph doesn't
    go with the second which isn't good to me..you shouldn't
    part from the subject..

    your vocabulary was par..
    flow was ok...you used some words over again
    however i like the subject
    and good content as well.



    stay elevating.

  12. #12
    Class of 06 Quest.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    NC
    Age
    37
    Posts
    10,839
    Battle Record
    84-13
    Awards FL Champion 50+ Wins
    Quote Originally Posted by Illus'Artis
    An ok piece here..
    however your first paragraph doesn't
    go with the second which isn't good to me..you shouldn't
    part from the subject..

    your vocabulary was par..
    flow was ok...you used some words over again
    however i like the subject
    and good content as well.



    stay elevating.
    thanx...i was just expanding the info and not just stickin to one subject....but non the less thanx for the feed

  13. #13
    . Illus''s Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Location
    Brooklyn
    Age
    46
    Posts
    8,361
    Battle Record
    8-7
    Recalls what he read*


    Use more multies and metaphors.
    Never try to end to lines with the same
    word..it just kills the enjoyment for me.
    Nice structure and good content..
    I know you stated that you wanted to give
    a better out look but try and blend the
    two paragraphs next time so that you don't
    leave the reader confused.
    blend them by gradually relaying one topic
    to another have hem relate.Stay writing espeically
    subjets about God it's always dope well atleast to
    me.


    sorry for the crappy feed eralier.
    Last edited by Illus'; March 9th, 2006 at 06:56 PM

  14. #14
    Newbie KazPer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    II.I.V
    Age
    37
    Posts
    22
    Battle Record
    1-0
    Ya flow was nyce, it came off more like a poem than a rap, but then again rap aint nuttin but poetry anyway. but i lik the way u were able to get deep but still understandable, 7.8/10 very good drop

  15. #15
    Class of 06 Quest.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    NC
    Age
    37
    Posts
    10,839
    Battle Record
    84-13
    Awards FL Champion 50+ Wins
    Quote Originally Posted by Illus'Artis
    Recalls what he read*


    Use more multies and metaphors.
    Never try to end to lines with the same
    word..it just kills the enjoyment for me.
    Nice structure and good content..
    I know you stated that you wanted to give
    a better out look but try and blend the
    two paragraphs next time so that you don't
    leave the reader confused.
    blend them by gradually relaying one topic
    to another have hem relate.Stay writing espeically
    subjets about God it's always dope well atleast to
    me.


    sorry for the crappy feed eralier.
    ight good look...thanx for the feed again

Similar Threads

  1. Eyes Open
    By The Dark Knight in forum Open Mic
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: January 29th, 2008, 11:02 AM
  2. Open Eyes
    By mosh_master in forum Open Mic
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: May 18th, 2006, 05:54 PM
  3. please open ur eyes
    By severe lyrics in forum Poetic Scriptures
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: June 24th, 2004, 11:15 PM
  4. Open Your Eyes
    By rule in forum Open Mic
    Replies: 15
    Last Post: February 9th, 2004, 10:23 PM

Posting Rules

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •